My poor fanny

[bigredboil]

Ok, obviously name changed for this. I have a massive book on my pubic area. It hasn't got a head, it's just a huge angry looking lump.
It hurts. It is so sore. And I'm fat. So getting to it is not easy. But is doable.

Please lovely sporners...help me!

Dh has completely blocked out the information. He has forgotten. Bruce won't be getting popped by him. Weirdo.
I have a huge tolerance for hot water so I gave him a good scalding in the shower a little while ago, had a hot cotton pad on it after but it kept moving.
Poked at it with a needle again but absolutely no joy.
I just remembered I had one similar about 15 years ago, down lower and inside slightly.
When it burst(in the shower) it was green, porridgey, like peas and porridge mixed, absolutely glorious.
I enjoyed that one.

I am loving how enthusiastic everyone is getting over a stranger’s intimate boil.
Keep us posted OP 🤣🤣🤣

This board is lovely. No bad news. Only mild disappointment if something doesn't turn out to be sporny. Hope it soon goes !

When it burst(in the shower) it was green, porridgey, like peas and porridge mixed, absolutely glorious.

<sigh>

You can make magnesium sulphate paste from Epsom salts. Just mix the salts with a bit of water.

Try again for a photo!

Can't believe it's not erupted yet!

And make sure you have Prime so it arrives quicker - even if it’s just to satisfy our desire to hear that it’s popped on the board 🤣🤣🤣

OP, I think it's time for antibiotics

I'm pretending to type that I'm saying something useful but just heavily invested.

Same 😬

Me too! Good luck OP. Sad no photo😅

Omg hahaha see when you said 'gave him a good scalding...' I thought you were talking about your husband but no, it's the boil you're on about! 😂😂
God that tickled me - thank you
Hope you get a big juicy jump of jelly from Bruce soon

I have always deliberately avoided this board because ick.

But I am now strangely fascinated and seem to have been converted.

My only vaguely interesting boil story is that when I was about 5 or 6, my friend invited me to her home, to watch her older brother get a boil on his back lanced by the GP. I declined.

(Yes, there really was a time when a GP would visit your home, by appointment, to lance a boil. Would have been about 1967. Audience optional. And no, I have no idea why I remember this.)

Google the glass bottle technique for boils. It involves filling a glass bottle with hot, not boiling water, letting the glass heat through, then emptying the bottle and placing the open end of the bottle over the boil, keeping an airtight seal around the skin. As the bottle cools, a vacuum is created, which draws the boil to a head and often draws the pus out.
This can work very well after the hot compress and mag sulph.
It is better than squeezing, which risks forcing bacteria deeper into the tissues.

I've had a few of these. Yes, the eruption can be glorious BUT- sometimes if you squeeze too much before it's ready, you can push whatever infection might be brewing further in. Believe me, I've been there!

Can you get into a GP for antibiotics? I really think it's warranted here.

I’m in Australia, impatiently awaiting for Bruce’s explosion! Shamelessly place marking for updates

Ooooo! 😀

Shamelessly placemarking! Come on Bruce!

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/cjV4VxYHYPs

I will just leave this here. The glass bottle method.

That is ….. unholy

(unlike the title of this thread, which is pure Jane Austen)

Shamelessly placemarking

How is Bruce this morning?

If its big red and angry you need antibiotics. I went to walk in with one a few years back and was given strong antibiotics and a special queue jump card to come back. If it wasn't significantly improved in three days I was to come back in (on Christmas eve) to be look at booking in for surgical removal. These can turn nasty quickly.

I still hot a good burst out but it kept refilling (but more like a spot than a boil) so I got plenty more painless pops out until a hair came out with the pus. The hair had turned completely back on itself and had corkscrewed at the end as nowhere else to go! After that it cleared up and never came back.

Wake up OP!

Oh I need to know more 😬 I do love a good boil