Share with Dettol your tips for how to find the right balance between being there for your child and being over protective - £300 voucher to be won!NOW CLOSED

[EllieMumsnet]

Finding the balance between protecting your child and letting them have independence is something many parents find difficult. To kick off the launch of their ‘Protect Like a Mother’ campaign Dettol would like you to share with them you and your partners’ tips and experiences on how you find that oh so tricky balance.

Here’s what Dettol has to say: “We know that a mother’s protection of her child is unconditional and just like an animal in the wild, she will do whatever it takes to create a safe environment for her family. We provide mums with that same unconditional protection for the whole family throughout the home.”

Watch their new ‘Protect Like a Mother’ campaign video here

Do you ever wonder if YABU about leaving your child home alone? Do you and your partner have to stop yourselves from constantly checking in on your newborn when they’re sleeping? Did you give your child a mobile phone as a way of giving them some freedom but still being able to check up on them? At what age did you let your child go out by themselves? When do you let them solve their own problems?

Whatever your experiences/tips Dettol wants to know. Share them in the thread below and be in with the chance of winning a £300 voucher of your choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck!

MNHQ

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I try not to be over bearing with my kids. I let my middle child do little jobs such as picking up a parcel that's been left with a neighbour. But my eldest is autistic so I need to keep constant eye on her as she us easily distracted. It can be hard to get that balance sometimes

I’d like to think that I allow my
Son to have independence but I’m
Always behind watching every cautious step he makes. So I will always have his back.

When you first let them out to the corner shop or somewhere nearby 'on their own' follow them without them seeing so you know that they go the most direct route and don't go wandering off. This gives them a sense of independence and you a peace of mind.

I remind myself first and foremost my purpose is to see them into adulthood safely and give them the tools they need to survive. I have to be careful that my emotional attachment doesn't become a selfish love and get in the way of that.

My son is age 10 and is at the stage of wanting to be really independent, It was only last weekend I agreed to take my son and his friend to the fun fair that was 10 miles away from home,
I drove them in and when we arrived I asked if they would like me to come with them and My son said NO THANK YOU! Lol!!
I stayed in the car and browsed through my phone, I lost count at the amount of times he popped back to the car to tell me about the rides they had both been on, i thought it was rather cute and still felt needed but he had the balance of independence and knowing i was just seconds away (hidden) ha ha

I always try to think that my parents weren't so overprotective and still me and my brother didn't get any odd diseases. So, I try to think what my mum was doing every time I realise I'm overprotective.

There's no right or wrong time to allow some independence, I suppose. I do what's best for my family, regardless of what others are doing. I have my own insecurities when it comes to letting her do certain things, but it's not fair on her to miss experiences because of this. I encourage her independence and confidence in allowing her to flourish and express who she is. Helping her grow up to be the amazing little lady she is supposed to be, shaped by the love and support continually surrounding her.

Give practical advice rather than shouts of fear when your kids are scaling the equipment. 'Try to get your knee on the bar' is much more effective in protecting your child than 'Oh my god be careful'.

There's lots of times I feel that I am being overprotective but I'm not unusual in that I think. It also depends which children talking about as my kids are also different. I have left my older child at home alone when she's agreed (nine) when I went over to the neighbour the other day. It's only two doors away but I still didn't linger!

Look at the situation, assess the risk and allow a few failures to aid developing character.
Failing that, hover like a loon and helicopter parent like my OH

I struggle with the children becoming autonomous as I am very risk averse. This is something I am working on.

I used to be a helicopter parent, I was way too overprotective of my girls but I'm letting them have more freedom as they need to have some sort of independence.

I try to make our DC as independent as possible so encourage them to do things by themselves as much as they can. DH however is more risk averse and still worries for example about our 3 year old going upstairs by herself whereas I'd get rid of the stairs gates tomorrow!
Both DC know to ask for help if they need it though and I'll be drilling that into them forever!!

I teach my kids if they need my help

Let them get on with life but let them know you're always there for them if needed

I'm quite overprotective. I don't let my daughter play out the front of the house or go to the park on her own. Instead I allow her to bring friends over, so I can keep an eye on them. I prefer he to be more independent at home. There are too many dangers outside of the house and she is too trusting.

I must admit its something I struggle with since losing my husband. I do little things to allow them to build their confidence . For example i take them to the park then i sit in the cafe across the road so its a sort of compromise. I let them join clubs that are supervised. I try to let them sort out fall out with friends and stuff them self weighing it up and making sure its not bullying.

i try to let my daughter have her reedom ass she should learn from her own mistakes!

Its a difficult one, with so much peer pressure you have to use you gut instinct

Always them have a go and try something whilst watching at a safe distance, always offer help even if they don't want it and praise when it all goes to plan!

Makes sure your not over protective because you’re letting your own paranoia project on to them. I was guilty of this and had to have a stern word with myself!

Its all about not over worrying. As they age it should come to you naturally.

I don't think that I am over protective. My DCs explore and learn by their mistakes. I would never let them get in danger but they are free to find their own way in life.

Don't make a big deal of it when your child hurts themselves, just laugh it off and usually they won't react. But be there to comfort them when they are very hurt, you can usually tell this by their cry.

I am very protective, I started to let my oldest son out when started secondary school, though only with a group of friends and not too far. I make sure he has a phone on him so that I can contact him or if he is stuck. I try to show them how do things so that they know what to do as they ask.