AIBU to ask my DCs to cry using their inside voices? - £300 voucher to be won NOW CLOSED

[CountOlaf]

Welcome, welcome, welcome to my first AIBU. Allow me to introduce myself, I am Count Olaf - the handsome, talented, actor extraordinaire. I have recently adopted the three ungrateful Baudelaire orphans after their parents perished in a house fire (perished means killed). I have kindly told them that my home is their home - but they must not touch anything. I have even provided a single bed for the three of them to share out of the kindness of my heart.

After instructing them to do simple tasks such as to clean the filthy bathroom using only toothbrushes, and to cook me and my theatre troop a delicious meal, they have the cheek to complain! They didn’t even applaud my theatre group's impeccable performance!

AIBU to think they are being spoilt brats and have a dangerous abundance of selfish disregard for me, IYSWIM? Tell me what you think and I will give one of you a £300 voucher - don’t ask me where I got the money from.

If you think I am BU, you are WRONG! Anyway, the theatre awaits…

Your Greatness,

Count Olaf

Standard Insight T&Cs Apply

This chain has actually made me lol! Although that may just be sleep deprivation

YABU! They'd be better off in the army!

You're being far too soft with them, and they're taking advantage. Honestly, what on earth were you thinking when you gave them a bed? They'll be demanding food and education next.

Take some time out to focus on your own needs - stop focusing on everyone else's demands and make yourself a priority for a change. And good luck!

Most definitely Yanbu - they should count their blessings

Shame on them for not enjoying your theatrical efforts!

Make them watch it again and again until they applaud!

No I don't think you're unreasonable! They need to pay their way, and be grateful!

Another new fangled way of thinking

i think you need to chill out a bit!

lol... is really all I have to say...............

just tell them to shut up and get on with it

YABU for mansplaining perished

Hmmm, that does sound like a Very Frustrating Dilemma. YANBU, best stick around for the massive fortune pleasure that children bring.

I would suggest the only thing you hide is the matches.. seems these little darlings might use their inner voices on you next!

Sounds perfectly reasonable to me .

Inside voices?! Oh how I dream of finding my DCs inside voices. We operate on football stadium voices most of the time but reading the above I can see where I've been going wrong. Thanks for the tips, am off to buy toothbrushes!

no no no. yanbu. I have children ( who cried a lot and loudly ), but nothing is more annoying. It also does something else. it shows that you are not ignoring their behavior but showing that certain behavior is not acceptable in certain places.

I think you're being a perfectly reasonable parent.

aaah Count Olaf... i suspect i know where you money has come from, and slap hands child benefit is for the children not for you to get new costumes and flaunt it on nights out with your troupe - and, it just isn't classy.

I am glad to hear you are not feeding them on take away food, but a bed each and some Stardrops and cloths might improve their performance in the chore department, and you could always pay them in advance to clap with glee at your troupe next performance!

I suspect they are ungrateful as they feel, well a little enclosed and locked away - fresh air is the tonic and I suggest you let them go out to play (after they have finished the bathroom of course)!

As for the dirty cash - life has taught me not to look a gift horse in the mouth - so if you give it to me I promise I will not spend it on lavish outfits, merely a pollytunnel so that my slave...oops sorry son... can be busy shovelling what comes out of the other end of the gift horse onto some vegetables! (but he can do that with a spade rather than a toothbrush as it might be a little faster)!

How entitled of them, I wouldn't let them cry at all! Maybe you should leave their other guardian to look after them and have a spa day.

Don't they have to climb up the chimney to sweep it too?

Yes they should be grateful! chores are a lesson in life and help them to understand responsibility!

They need to be loved, poor little orphans.

In my opinion sir you are indeed being unreasonable. I agree that they should indeed be grateful for the kindness you have bestowed upon them by taking them under your wing and allowing your home to be their home. However sir I fear you expect to much of them for such young children who have recently lost their parents. Perhaps they do not yet respect you because they do not really know you. I advise sir that you take your time to get to know them and them you, teach them all that you know and in time they may grow to be more appreciative of your generosity. Perhaps you will find yourself growing to care for them. Yours Truly, A Concerned Viewer.

I think you should tak eon my three for a week and see if you can get them to pick their underwear / dirty towels / clothes up off the floor or remove used crockery/cups from their pits sorry I mean bedroom and as for asking them to cry using their inside voices well I'm sorry that will only happen if theres an itunes app for it IYSWIM

Get them to sign a contract and then YANBU to punish them... Have you not seen Judge Rinder? :)