The Goose & Carrot Pub

[RedRegular]

A thread for all who have DC with SN. The thread is deleted in 90 days and doesn’t show in active. The season is changing and the bar is well stocked.

Hopefully you can build from the one hour @Lougle - its often exhausting to meet new people so would expect you would need to build up. DSs limit was about 1 minute of someone with him. 😂

I have a quote back re new shed design but there are issues with roof slope so we have to make another decision - current quote is £7770 and then if we want roof above 2.5 metres to maintain angle its another £995. I have just done some angle calculations and think it'll take height to 2.7 metres. The other issue is the tree branches - will have to take a look. I know before at 2.5 metres they weren't an issue, at 3 metres they were. I think we can find a solution but trying to avoid back and forth on planning. There's about a 15 week wait for planning after we have done form. Shed has 10 week wait but don't know whether to pay the £1500 deposit now. Maybe safer to wait. Its going to be going into autumn / winter as well or wait until next year.

It sounds like good progress @Tulipandmagnolia. Are you planning to insulate it? Insulating with Superfoil took 6 inches off each dimension.

@RedRegular playing the long game in style! £15 profit is pretty good, I think!

Well the cabin is almost finished. It's looking good and I'm glad it's done!

Not sure on insulation but useful to know how much it takes off. Its a slate effect tile roof. It has weatherboard 7 inch and then ply lining. Online it seems to say their roof eaves height is 1.83 metres which is just above DSs height and also its an apex roof so its just in the middle. I think if we stick to 2.5 metres height roof slope is 24 degrees. If we go to 30 degrees it needs to go to 2.71 metres high for an extra £995. We have big trees around which will drop branches. They said we can go up to 3 metres height but then it would be in tree branches which may trigger a tree report request and also not sure what advantage 3 metres high is over 2.7 metres. Its just slope of roof really rather than useable space.

Well done on cabin @Lougle, looks great.

@Lougle that looks brilliant!

One hour is great. Three hours is a lot to jump in with. When we introduce new staff working with DS1&3, we start very small, and that is after trial shifts, training and shadow shifts. Otherwise, it is setting everyone up to fail.

@Zeonlywayisup good luck with the appointment.

Yes, unfortunately I was in the car when they phoned to arrange the first session, so DD1 heard and insisted that she needed 3 hours, even though I was saying 1.

I shouldn't get frustrated, because DD1 is the same as she always is, but I put in a 17 hour day on Sunday and 15 hours yesterday, DD1 hasn't even taken a teaspoon to move a spoonful of soil, or done anything else to help, and she thinks I'm completely outrageous to be slightly miffed that she only spent 20 minutes in the cabin. I probably am, but I'm human.

Lovely cabin @Lougle and building up from an hour is very sensible.

Call with solicitor today re appeal, he suspects that even just seeing "he's at an SEMH school currently" may be putting off SLCN schools but hopefully we can remove everything else on the EHCP that is out of date and irrelevant and therefore preventing him from being in an SLCN environment.
I mean, if his current school actually bothered to do therapy/education that would be another thing, though I still have major concerns about the whole lack of safeguarding in SEMH settings.

I hope you can get a rest soon @Lougle. Its frustrating when they won't help at all but I think all you can do is try to look after yourself.

I noticed when you expand the photos you can see you and your 3 girls in them reflected in the glass.

lougle the cabin looks great. I agree that building up is best but 1 hour is a good start.
No wonder you are exhausted and frustrated.
It is my birthday today and I am trying very hard to be hands off and let my birthday meal be made for me but keep being asked to problem solve.

Happy Birthday! 🎂 NHMW

wow Lougle fab tiny house.

it’s 25 degrees here and we still had a walk 😮 I’m starting to believe that side effects have a lot to answer for.

Happy birthday @NoHaudinMaWheest

Well done @RedRegular and miniRed.

Happy Birthday @NoHaudinMaWheest.

@RedRegular brilliant to manage a walk.

@Lougle I’m not surprised you are exhausted.

Have settled on a roof height after doing calculations but now discussing windows. I am going to do a solid wood door as DS is heavy at closing doors and am worried glass might break. DS also doesn't like windows /light but its balancing that with needing some light. I think we have solution now but may add a bit to first quote. I think we may try planning first before giving deposit to be sure we can do this. I think it should get through but you never know and living in a village some people have nothing better to do than comment on applications. We have not had issues but the council publish everything and 2 of our neighbours write 5 page objections to each other. They tried to get us involved but we are staying out of it, I don't care about things like what shade of a colour someone's porch is.

DH came back with peaches then went upstairs for a minute. In that minute the fruit monster struck.

Need to stop gardening in dresses I have 26 very itchy bites.

Ouch @Tulipandmagnolia

Happy Birthday @NoHaudinMaWheest !

Oh happiest of birthdays to you @NoHaudinMaWheest . Yes, birthdays rarely stay as birthdays for us, do they? I think the best one for me, was that my aunt was in hospice care late in the month before my birthday. I turned to my DM and said 'Mark my words, she'll die on my birthday.' At 05.30 am on my birthday, the phone rang and my DM said 'Happy birthday, darling. Your Aunty x died this morning.' I spent my birthday at the hospice, sitting next to my dead Aunt, while my uncle read the newspaper!

A close second was when we kept sheep, and we headed to the farm to check on them. The co-owner phoned as we arrived, and said 'Don't worry about the sheep today, DH has checked them.' As we were there, we just said hi to them. But two didn't come and say hello as they normally did. We went to investigate and saw that they were badly suffering from flystrike. So I spent my birthday manhandling sheep into our 'ambulance' (trailer) to get them down to the stable, visiting B&Q to buy Hazmat suits, shearing the sheep, demaggoting, and applying flystrike treatment.

I hope you've found pockets of peace and tranquility in the day.

Happy Birthday @NoHaudinMaWheest birthdays are like that here too. You are loved and that is very precious.

@Tulipandmagnolia you could put in those natural light funnel things in the roof. In Africa they use bottles but they sell more proper ones. If you’re not having any electricity you can get rechargeable light switches and wall lamps/table lamps. I have some (rural house with regular power cuts) and they are cheap and useful. Height is always a flag with planning. I’d definitely get planning before ordering.

@Lougle it’s beautiful. You do so well for your girls.

@RedRegular thats amazing. You’ve come so far with your girls. It’s just the best news hearing about it.

It’s been a long day. EHC has been ceased. We are going to try valproate. Community want to check in every two weeks, clinic we can call if concerned and see in three months, the latter sounds more “me” iykwim. I just feel I can’t rehash everything endlessly. I keep notes on any concerns but talking it through every other week will make it much bigger and ds will have to hear it. 🙁. and a dear friend told me today she wasn’t going to continue with her chemo.

some days aren’t great.

Sorry its been a tough day @Zeonlywayisup Chemo is tough going, hopefully they have done enough of it already. You can also take breaks for a few weeks if they just need a reset.

We are going to stick to 2.5 metres, and I think we will wait for planning before placing order. I've added another window to make 3 and waiting for updated quote.

Its nice having DH around all the time. He did more gardening in the lane today. Tomorrow he is doing his classic car. I've just booked us an afternoon tea and house visit on Friday. We will do gardening / shed on Thursday.

Thanks for all the birthday wishes. The meal came together nicely in the end.

lougle those are some tough birthdays. My worst was the day after Ds was admitted to a psychiatric unit in London.

Zeonlywayisup I am sorry it has been a tough day. I hope you can make a good forward plan for Ds.

Tulipandmagnolia glad you are enjoying having DH around.

@Zeonlywayisup life is chunky. Goodbye EHC it wasn’t working and the pummelling away to shape it to fit in the final 3 years of the window is energy taken from all the good stuff that DS is getting on with. It is done never look back.

Glad we caught the last chance to walk as the forecast is hot and very hot for 2 weeks.

Just catching up.
The shed looks great @Lougle
Whoop more walks @RedRegular and errgh I’ve just seen the forecast for next week looks hot hot I really don’t like it above 22c I just shut down & dd2 starts struggle too. @Zeonlywayisup hope a better path for DS opens up and you can enjoy your time together more.
@NoHaudinMaWheest happy birthday.
@Tulipandmagnolia sounds like shed plans are coming together well. Glad your enjoying DH company.

I’m utterly exhausted but it’s self inflicted as DD2 & I had a great if very tiring 24hrs in London. She coped brilliantly & really enjoyed herself. Plus huge thanks to the loop ear plugs. I’ve now ordered myself some as I was the one struggling with noise overwhelm. We did trains, buses, tube and walked 24k steps in one day. She had a wobble at one thing but lots of calming technique and reassurance and she was able to reset herself.,I’m so proud of her, just 6months ago this would have not been possible the ADHD meds have made so much difference to her ability to manage. I’m sure there will be fall out now for 48hrs as her energy reserves will be depleted as our mine but I’ve got to muster something up to get working now. Caffeine is required today!

You're really making such good progress - unthinkable a couple of years ago!!