The Goose & Carrot Pub

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A thread for all who have DC with SN. The thread is deleted in 90 days and doesn’t show in active. The season is changing and the bar is well stocked.

Got DS EHCP but I can't be bothered to look at it before putting in for appeal. No bandwidth what with work and now DM in hospital (I've been posting in Elderly Parents). DS did some more writing today, used "eerie" which he had to ask about.
School told us DS is "on track to do Entry Level 3 maths in Y11" which again shows THEY CAN'T BE BOTHERED.

Thanks @BlueandWhitePorcelain Yes definitely no PVC. Our houses here are Tudor so its Tudor colours but every Tudor house here is black and white (black is the beams). I think the black comes from Victorian times and it was dark brown originally but it also goes on what it was on the date it was listed. This guide seems to have the colour choice as white to light grey. I am hoping to do a white house with a coloured door. Lots of people here do make their doors coloured and worst that can happen is you'd have to repaint it an approved colour but they have got hardly any staff so no-one does anything. I think colours were only used by the very wealthy / royalty. They can be very fussy about details. It does depend a bit who you get.

https://www.edwardbulmerpaint.co.uk/inspiration/how-to-choose-colours-for-your-period-property/?srsltid=AfmBOorp3WeJz7vxBXcB0LP1L2HO6rQLHOjiCPZkuCtPrbr4jG34xqiL

Sorry about your Mum @drspouse

@FrostySunRun legally, the phase transfer review must be undertaken within 12 months of transfer and the amended EHCP must finalised by 31st March of Y11. Your LA knows this. They are trying their luck. In order for this to happen, the phase transfer review meeting should be held the autumn term of Y11 (or failing that at the very, very beginning of January). Otherwise the LA is at risk of breaching the deadline.

When LAs wrongly use the Y10 review, in the vast majority of cases they ‘just’ breach the timescales rather than finalise in the autumn term of Y11, so most don’t get appeal rights until March of Y11 anyway. It is the same when LAs use the Y5 review as the phase transfer review. Most still don’t get the EHCP with secondary placement until Feb or Jan if they are lucky.

If you want to, you can push back on the LA using the AR in a few weeks as the phase transfer review.

@drspouse I’m sorry your DM is in hospital.

@drspouse I hope your DM improves very swiftly.

@drspouse really difficult for you. The hump of suitable care for the reluctant is hard. A breezy approach with no decisions works better for my DM anything else is a no. Most importantly get your own head and heart as settled as it can be.

@Lougle oh check you out, posh paint/own graft/stunning result designer/builder. Love it! Brava! DD1 popping her head above the parapet and showing her old/actual self is the best.

I’m sorry to hear about your mum @drspouse its such a difficult phase of life both mine are 80s very very stubborn & passive aggressive behaviour is increasing as my mum in particular refuses to make any changes to her lifestyle yet really needs support now caring for my dad.

Thanks @scoopofmintchocchipicecream the LA appear to be doing this as a LA process now it’s not just a couple it’s lots of AR being bought forward to June & July and treated as phased transfer reviews. I did already write in an email to them that I didn’t agree but as usual it’s ignored. Sigh more games whilst at the same time putting out lots PR in their newsletter about all the amazing improvements they are making in send services and their communication. Hahaha.

really hope you can continue to secure the right provision you need for DS1 too

I’m here but life crazy. @Lougle veeerrryyy swanky! I am impressed. I do think that small house/garden room/separate but together is the answer for ongoing care. Well done for making it all happen.

Ds is still a bit up and down. I’m feeling a bit odd, but I think just stress and we’ve had family funerals and family in hospital so all a bit much. I’m trying to enjoy each day and just do jobs off the list. Work also a bit busy, and I’ve got a lot of catching up to do. Bleurgh. Wasn’t being grown up supposed to mean you were free?

Sorry to hear about DM @drspouse . It’s very difficult being pulled both ways by aging parents and DC!

@Zeonlywayisup sorry to read family have been in hospital.

@FrostySunRun if you wanted to force the LA’s hand and they are ignoring you, you would be able to go down the pre-action letter route if the LA refused to hold a phase transfer review in the autumn term.

Still dealing with post exam anxiety here poor DD2 had full teary melt down before going to tutoring this afternoon. “… Everything is too hard she’s useless she can’t understand anything …” all this came pouring out between snotty tears.. the reality that she’s sat one exam and now the plan was to sit the next two made up of 4 papers in November is now looming and her brain has gone back into panic mode. Even my eldest who went to the college the LA want to name for post16 in 16mths time said “mum she’ll never cope next year she’s just not ready emotionally” she can’t cope around her peer group at all as all the old self doubt and trauma just floods back to the surface. I’m trying to get her to walk home from the local tutor but because it involves walking down the road at 3.30pm she can’t because there will be other peers about. She’ll walk down that road in daytime when they are at school though.

Just called the mediation service for a mediation certificate and emailed the solicitor we used before to ask them to act for us again through tribunal.
Last time we didn't make it to tribunal as they conceded before we got there.

@drspouse I hope the solicitor can get them to concede before tribunal as I’ve heard it’s still a year plus wait time. I really don’t have the fight in me for post 16 if our LA do what I’m assuming they will.

Hope the LA will back down @FrostySunRun that's sad she's scared to walk home at 3.30pm. DS was like that and they think he was likely bullied but of course they all denied it.

DS is slamming the doors now as he goes to garden every 5 minutes and its doing my head in - maybe the doors have changed with the temperature. DH is almost deaf so doesn't hear it much and after DS goes cat sometimes starts howling for DS.

Still after this week DH will be home so hopefully will have more time to find solutions.

Sorry about funerals and hospital @Zeonlywayisup

Hospitals and funerals are never good @Zeonlywayisup. I hope everything improves where it can.