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Original poster

Anyone want to accompany me while i sleep train DD?

523 replies

MrsKoala · 07/12/2017 13:58

I am starting to sleep train 13mo DD tonight. She has been a terrible sleeper since birth and always co-slept on the boob. I had a consultation with a sleep expert today who has talked me thru a gentle process of sleep training.

I am starting tonight as DH is away for a week from next Thursday, so i want it in place for then. DH is not particularly supportive because he hates them crying (and i love it obviously Hmm ) so it would be great if there was someone who was doing theirs at the same time for a mutual support group!

OP posts:
FannyTheFlamingo · 07/12/2017 20:58

@Kentnurse2015 It's a whole other thread! I can't let myself get angry, otherwise it'll affect my ability to deal with everything else, so I need to not let it bother me.

Kentnurse2015 · 07/12/2017 20:59
Sad
Original poster
MrsKoala · 07/12/2017 21:02

She's asleep. 1 hr 45mins.

The first hour was more angry yelling and wailing than crying. No real tears. The last 45mins was more like real crying and the last 15 mins she was actually asleep but crying in her sleep.

It's not that DH isn't supportive - he's happy i'm doing it,but he caves immediately. What's the point? Well it isn't humbling kept awake all night and when he works away i'm fucked, So the point is that i need to do this for me.

It's okay Kent, I don't mind what Marie said. I still wouldn't do it her way even if i had a time machine to go back and start again. We all make choices that we can live with and i chose to wait till dd was a year before i did any training. I knew i would have buckled and just made it worse if i tried before now. I had 2 half hearted attempts when she was 6 months and i knew i couldn't go on.

Anyway, i suspect i'm in for a rough night so i'm off to bad. Thanks for all the support. I did think at one point - just think how good it will be to go back on MN and say she's asleep!

OP posts:
nuttyknitter · 07/12/2017 21:28

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Sparrowlegs248 · 07/12/2017 21:34

Oh ffs. Bugger off Nutty that's not helpful.

Op I'm all for avoiding crying. Ds1 didn't cry. I fear ds2 will be different. He's definitely got more of a temper on him. Don't let stupid comments like that bother you. You were right there, she was warm, fed and had you thee for comfort. And now she's asleep.

RockinRobinTweets · 07/12/2017 21:34

Hope you get some rest Mrs.

Some folk have no idea what actually constitutes child abuse. 3 nights of crying in a loving, caring home is not child abuse. No way, no how.

Original poster
MrsKoala · 07/12/2017 21:35

Ha. That’s got to be an actual joke. Or do you really think I should continue not sleeping longer than 45 mins at a time and holding a baby on my breast all night. For over a year. Being unable to drive because I’m so dangerously tired? Crying and shouting over nothing, forgetting everything?

If it isn’t a joke then you sound a total fool.

Anyway, she woke briefly cried out and then just went back to sleep. One thing I’m concerned about is how do they stay warm? She won’t have blankets on her and I’m not cuddling her now and the house is cold.

OP posts:
Sparrowlegs248 · 07/12/2017 21:37

Grobag? Ds1 had them his first 2 winters. He's 2.5 now a days won't have one. He's in summer weight full length pj's with a fleecy onesie on top and bed socks.

RebeccaNoodles · 07/12/2017 21:37

Zip her into a sleeping bag tomorrow night. Cosy, 3 togs. Well done OP, you did it! Stay strong.

OneGreyElephantBalancing · 07/12/2017 21:38

Hi. Just to say I did this at 10 months.

Almost exactly the same technique. First night similarly. 1 hr 45. Subsequent bed times were improved and after 3 nights we had it done enough to regain some sanity.

I'm with you in spirit. Hang in there. It's utterly emotionally draining if I recall.

Original poster
MrsKoala · 07/12/2017 21:40

Oh I don’t have anything like that. All of mine have slep with us and never would have a blanket on them. What shall I do for tonight? I triad a blanket just now and she screamed and licked it off.

OP posts:
Sparrowlegs248 · 07/12/2017 21:44

Go in once she's more settled and put a blanket over her? I always think it would be nice for ds to have a hot water bottle to cuddle but the thought worries me

Kentnurse2015 · 07/12/2017 21:45

Please no hot water bottles for babies!!!!!!

Kentnurse2015 · 07/12/2017 21:46

Place a blanket on when she is more settled but yes definitely try and get hold of a sleeping bag tomorrow. What temp is the room at overnight do you know?

Original poster
MrsKoala · 07/12/2017 21:50

I’m sleeping in here with her so if it gets too cold I’ll just have to put the heating on. Problem is the rad in dh and ds2 room is broken and belts out heat. I’ve got a blanket on her now. Where would I buy a sleeping bag? I’m not near any shops. How do they stand up in their cot?

OP posts:
Original poster
MrsKoala · 07/12/2017 21:51

I don’t know the temp of the room.

OP posts:
Kentnurse2015 · 07/12/2017 21:54

No stress about the temperature. I just wondered.

Do you have any friends who could loan you a sleeping bag? My little one is in 2.5 tog usually (a normal winter tog) but his room gets very cold (down to 13 degrees) so he does go into 3.5 tog occasionally)

They can definitely still move around and stand up in the cot in them!

Original poster
MrsKoala · 07/12/2017 21:59

I’ve put the heating on. It’s too cold for her without it. It’s a big old draft house so I’d rather be sure she’s warm.

OP posts:
Original poster
MrsKoala · 07/12/2017 22:01

I can’t sleep without her. I feel weird and anxious.

OP posts:
Original poster
MrsKoala · 07/12/2017 22:04

Right. Shutting my eyes now. Night night.

OP posts:
mamma2016 · 07/12/2017 22:04

I’m very grateful to see this thread tonight. My 14 month baby’s sleep is so similar. All my friends babies sleep well and I feel at a loss of what to do. I’m ready to stop BF now but it’s so hard to stop when I’m so desperate for sleep and have to be up early for a long working day. Only BF in the night now and only feed after 4 but my baby still wakes at least twice before that.
I wish you success OP and lots of sleep! My baby has no problem rolling, sitting and standing in a sleeping bag. He can fall asleep independently too but I always end up cosleeping at some point in the night- and then he often wakes even more! I too am debating a sleep consultant but wonder if it’s too expensive?

Kentnurse2015 · 07/12/2017 22:05

You're doing fine. You know the first few nights would be tricky. It is as much about training your body as training hers. If you can't sleep just try and do something relaxing instead for now. Book? Podcast? Radio?

FannyTheFlamingo · 07/12/2017 22:05

DD stands up and takes her sleeping bag off, and also she sleeps on her front so she ends up all twisted up in it, so since I started CC I've swapped to an extra layer and blankets. When I know she's properly asleep, I go in and check it's still on her. You could order a sleeping bag online if there's no shops near you?

StinkPickle · 07/12/2017 22:10

Get a sleeping bag online. EBay or the grobag website. She definitely need something or she will be freezing and won’t sleep well.

If I had no duvet on I’d be stone cold

Kentnurse2015 · 07/12/2017 22:17

My child literally won't sleep without a sleeping bag on - naps or night time!