Safeguarding on the sex chat thread on the sex board

[AutumnLeavesFallingIntoPlace]

There have been a number of threads about changes to the Sex Board and the standard @MNHQ response is that they're taking feedback on board and ask us to hide the topic, which doesn't answer people's questions. I'd really appreciate some answers specifically about the sex chat thread on the sex board.

The user registration requirement to post on Sex has changed from 3 months to 7 days. It was in place to discourage trolls and predators on the Sex board so it would be helpful to know why that's no longer a concern and 7 days is deemed sufficient.

The sex chat thread exists for users to connect via PM for explicit chat and the thread advises posters they can then move that conversation to platforms like Kik and Telegram. At the moment, MN's advice is to report dodgy PMs; once users move off site this of course no longer applies.

Defence of the sex chat thread seems to be 'it's fine between consenting adults'. MNHQ, please could you tell us what measures you take to ensure participants there are adults? Currently, there is no safety warning and no age verification. How do you intend to keep any underage users from accessing this thread? How can anyone on there know that posters are over 18? You have removed the previously existing safeguards; why is this and will you put any more in place?

There is a risk users might feel safer and more inclined to trust a sex chat hosted by a site like MN; it does feel odd that you haven't made any attempt to counter this by pinning a post reminding users that MN can't vouch for anyone on there, particularly now the three month registration period is gone. Do you intend to do this?

Finally, the thread contains a number of married men who 'aren't getting any at home' and are seeking 'any available female' (direct quotes). Can you confirm this is in the spirit of MN and that you're happy to let it stand?

Thanks, and please don't advise us to hide the sex board again, or even just the sex chat thread, we get that's the MN party line but would really like an answer to the actual questions.

His thread has not gone unnoticed. It’s been discussed on other threads and other sites where people are discussing the mumsnet sex topic issues, so I wouldn’t feel too bad.

If he writes posts like that, he’s going to get a lot of people calling him a perv. He might even like that. It adds to the thrill for some. <shudder>

@Rieslinger i see it’s your turn to be vilified. Funny how no one is bothering to repost all the insightful discussions you’ve had xx

I’m not sure a man who needs advice on quick-release trews while out in the countryside has any ‘insights’ I’d welcome. But then as long as that sort of dodgy stuff stays on a topic I’ve hidden 🤷‍♀️. It rarely does, though, ime. <sigh>
Indecent exposure is a huge red flag for other things fyi.

Indecent exposure? Noooooo, I think you’ve mid interpreted his question! Did you read the original post or did you just jump on a bandwagon?

While out WITH his partner.

Is it huge red flag for her as well?
Is she a pervert?
Should it be implied she's also a sleezy predator?
Potential danger to society?

Surplus, just give up.

Yes his dp must be a grubby perv too. Imagine that wanting to have sex that doesn't involve lights out and nightie up for 5 minutes.

5 minutes?

You mean they do it TWICE?? 😳

Stop with the smut talk, they'll be some with faces like bulldogs sucking wasps as we speak.

@Janiie wow imagine having a sex life that takes place in various places positions etc that you don't feel the need to splatter all over a parenting forum...I mean I am a member of several jazz forums how the hell am I surviving without a sun forum to talk about my crotch less panties to tantalise my other half when we take a drive to bridge club....

He should have posted in Style and Beauty surely? 🤔

With his partner involved it wouldn't work in DIY

Sorry what? jazz forums?

Anywayyy if you wanted to go on a dedicated sex board and ask for tips on 'crotchless panties' whilst you drive to bridge I'd also defend your right to do so.

Horses for courses.

Do they talk about trousers in DIY? Maybe boiler suits and overalls but that’s the opposite of what he needs presumably.

@Janiie yeah for people who are interested in music other than BTS or whatever kids listen to these days

@Janiie but that's the point...a jazz/parenting forum doesn't need a board for perverts does it

People discussing sex and their problems or chatting to others are not necessarily 'pervs'. I don't doubt the sex board has trolls as does the rest of the site and everywhere else online but honestly, just report. If there was seedy inappropriate content over there it would soon be zapped. However easy access trousers and sextoy discussion is nothing to be horrified about.

Again you don’t need to like it, join in or even look but calling people perverts as if we live in the 50s is batshit.

@Janiie - this board is supposed to make parents lives easier. And as it's called Mumsnet and the majority of parenting is still done by women, can you explain to me how married men looking for women to talk dirty to them is 'making parents lives easier'?

Women talking about sex issues between you and your partner I totally get. Women talking about problems if you're single I totally get.

Men using MN as a hook up site I don't get.

And discussing porn type scenarios and underage sex
Nope sorry not buying it that you want to paint everyone who objects to perverse men invading women's safe space AGAIN as man hating sex hating old biddies from the 50s
There are plenty more appropriate places to discuss how sexually liberal you are

I don’t see any posts about the mn thread on the 800,000 starving children?

“Mumsnet and the majority of parenting is still done by women, can you explain to me how married men looking for women to talk dirty to them is 'making parents lives easier'?” Well some mums like a quick fuck. 🤷🏼‍♀️Escapism, whatever. Pretty grim imo - but I just don’t go on those boards, add to them etc

And there are plenty of forums people can join if they want a 'quick fuck' like I say I wouldn't demand a jazz forum make a sex topic so I can get a hook up without having to pay for the other sites!

I'm sure many gardeners dream of a quick fuck whilst tending to their gladioli however most gardening forums won't have a specific forum catering to pervs. But there are many such forums for that they can join without judgement

I do think it's a valid point that Mumsnet isn't the first place most men would think of to find someone to hook up with if they aren't 'getting any at home'.