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MNHQ

Mumsnet Christmas Appeal/Secret Santa - your thoughts please?

258 replies

JustineMumsnet · 08/09/2014 11:14

Hi all,

It's that time of year again where we are looking towards Christmas and thinking about the annual Mumsnet Secret Santa.

For those of you who've no clue what we're on about, the Mumsnet Christmas Appeal is an annual (obviously) tradition in which MNers nominate other MNers whom they feel to be particularly deserving of support/reward/love to receive a Secret Santa gift. More about it here - and here's how it works plus some FAQs, too.

As we said, it has a long and honourable history on MN - but some have suggested that now we've got Giving Week we should think about retiring the Secret Santa.

So we thought we'd take this opportunity to ask you, before we launch it as usual, if you'd like us to continue with it. We do love helping with the Secret Santa and the thankyou thread is always a very moving read, but it's quite a mammoth thing to organise and there have been a number of complaints about gifts not arriving and/or a lack of thankyou messages which has put a slight dampener on it in recent years.

In short we're happy to stop if folks think it has run its course - and happy to continue if people still think it's worthwhile.

We'd be very grateful for any and all thoughts. Please do post them here.

OP posts:
cozietoesie · 08/09/2014 18:18

I rather like the idea of actual donations being to a children's charity or wome's refuge but I sense that that might need a bit more thought (and organization) at this time of the year given that October will soon be upon us and many people will need a little notice to eg start to make presents. (I seem to recall that there were also thoughts at the time of the Giving Week about combining that with the Secret Santa in some way?)

Perhaps we should ask for it to run as in previous years for 2014 (learning some final lessons from it) but with a view to a possible comprehensive overhaul of both events in 2015?

CMOTDibbler · 08/09/2014 18:32

I really like it, but maybe something like an organised collection of things for womens refuges (or a charity who want things that mnetters are likely to have to donate) would work better overall - so you could send things bagged up as 'girls outfit age 7', a shoebox of toys/books for a boy age 5, bag of toiletries, emergency bag for a baby etc

PetulaGordino · 08/09/2014 18:34

isn't there often one done via a john lewis gift list (not sure who runs this)? a totally different set-up of course

frankie80 · 08/09/2014 18:40

I like it but I do feel it can be a popularity contest. Also those who nominated themselves got heavily criticised which I felt was unfair as they might still need the help.

Also I missed out one year as I hadn't seen the nomination PM so perhaps an easier way of notifying?

Sparklingbrook · 08/09/2014 18:43

I don't understand nominating yourself. Should that be allowed?

Floralnomad · 08/09/2014 18:44

I agree with daisyflowerchain , also definitely call it secret Santa ,it is not an appeal and that terminology is misleading .

glenthebattleostrich · 08/09/2014 18:47

I like it. But agree it should be secret santa rather than gift appeal.

This is the first year I can afford to donate so please don't get rid!

Oodlives · 08/09/2014 18:52

Yes it should continue, new rules about checking via MNHQ if it's been received rather than keeping posting on the thread.
Get rid of appeal and no self nominations.

cozietoesie · 08/09/2014 19:05

I wasn't aware that it was even possible to nominate yourself.

FruVikingessOla · 08/09/2014 19:16

"I don't understand nominating yourself. Should that be allowed?"
"I wasn't aware that it was even possible to nominate yourself."

Shock do people actually do that? I'm Shock

Sparklingbrook · 08/09/2014 19:17

I don't get it either Fru. Confused

FruVikingessOla · 08/09/2014 19:23

I had absolutely no idea either, Sparkling. I've been part of it for the last two years, but I'm .... a bit surprised ..............

AndHarry · 08/09/2014 19:54

Petula it's Women's Aid who do the JL gift list.

As unpopular as it'll make me, I say scrap it. Too many hard feelings from too many posters and obviously a heck of a lot of work for MNHQ that I think could be better devoted to something that would help people in need.

Maryz · 08/09/2014 20:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sparklingbrook · 08/09/2014 20:12

My understanding of it was the same as yours Maryz.

Sparkletastic · 08/09/2014 20:19

Too open to abuse. Donations to Women's Aid instead.

lordnoobson · 08/09/2014 20:20

i got something and was rather confused by it.
I am not nice or supportive, on the whole, and generally just get cross on mn.

lordnoobson · 08/09/2014 20:20

( I did email MNHQ and suggest it was a typo)

Sparklingbrook · 08/09/2014 20:23

Perhaps people are entertained by your crossness lord.

lordnoobson · 08/09/2014 20:25

Maybe. It was a generous gift pats tum
but the criteria are a little odd

Powaqa · 08/09/2014 20:55

Last year tainted it for me. I remember it all kicking off after one person who wasn't nominated said how much it upset her. Cue lots of posts from upset posters on both sides of the fence.

That's when I also found out that people could nominate themselves.

I like the idea of running a secret Santa and just giving at the same time - perhaps one Just Giving campaign for the Womens Refuge

hevak · 08/09/2014 21:05

I think it's the word "appeal" that confuses people. I had seen it mentioned on the site last year but didn't have the time/headspace to donate. I assumed from the word appeal that there was some kind of criteria/hardship being experienced by the recipients.

IMO it's either a Secret Santa or an Appeal - but not both IYSWIM? I love the idea of both/either but I think a Secret Santa would be fun, especially if everyone understood the rules (whatever MNHQ decide the rules are!). I just think it wasn't very clear last year what the criteria were.

If you haven't been on mumsnet for a long time, or only come on here infrequently (like me) and don't know the history then it can be confusing and I can see why some people were unhappy when they discovered that it wasn't run how they thought/assumed it was. IIRC the word appeal had misled quite a few people.

It's a lovely idea though! Smile

BewitchedBotheredandBewildered · 08/09/2014 21:07

I think it would be huge shame for the Christmas Thing or Giving Week to to stop.

Like other posters, I was horrified at the misery and nit-picking provoked by both.

I equate it to sport, which is something I have little interest in, and rarely get any pleasure from.

But I wouldn't turn up at a golf course, tennis court or football match and start berating the players and the audience about how silly it is to kick a big ball, thwack a ball that bounces or belt a tiny ball miles away.

If playing with/watching other people play with balls gives people so much pleasure they should be free to pursue that Grin

Anyone who doesn't like Ch.T or GW is FREE TO SWERVE IT!

Peace and love Flowers

AndHarry · 08/09/2014 21:18

I'd be all up for a Secret Santa but can imagine it all kicking off with people not receiving a present when they had sent one.

andadietcoke · 08/09/2014 21:18

I was reading through this feeling fairly ambivalent about the whole thing, and then saw a message from the MNetter I nominated last year. She utterly, utterly deserved something nice and I'm so pleased it had the desired outcome.

So I vote yes. No one should need a thank you, or a clap on the back for being so generous, it's just about making someone smile.