How much is everyone really getting?!

[Ruskyrobins24]

For those in long term relationships with small children...
How often do you actually have sex?!

I think I read somewhere that 30 mins is "average" for foreplay followed by PIV.
30 mins is a good time I think....although morning, 10 min quickies are usually a nice change too!!

Wicked that's so lovely
Isn't it great when you get a little "moment" like that and you are both in tune with it...doesn't happen very often, but when it does? Wow! Makes you realise just how much you love him doesn't it? 😍

i feel like i must be doing it wrong :( it used to be all the time, now it's 1 or 2 times a month and even when i shimmy around in sexy pants, he's too busy playing games on the bloody computer. why am i with a 29 year old child?! sob

Probably 2/3 times a week if we're lucky. It's not for the want of trying either, ds is 1 and not in his own room still eyeroll. Our sofa has seen quite a lot of action in the last six months..

It used to be all the time here too. Had DD, and now I think the last time we had sex was... April, maybe? I hope it's right about sex drive going up as you get older, I'm only 21

I have endometriosis so I get very bad stomach pains after sex to the extent of crying, which is a bit of a boner killer unfortunately.

All the bloody time at the moment but when we are not ttc-ing, usually between 2-3 times a week, but we do go through quiet patches sometimes for up to about a month between shags.

DP and I have been together for 7 years, 2 DC age 3 and 1. We've had lots of ups and downs with regards to bedroom stuff over the years. When I was pregnant with DD1 I totally lost any urge for sex and we didn't do it for something like 7 months! That was the 'lowest' point in regards to sex I think, although other aspects of our relationship seemed okay. Pregnancy completely ruined my drive first time round, didn't seem as bad second time round.

On average I'd say we manage once a week or once every 2 weeks but we probably have bouts where we go longer. It's hard sometimes to get in the mood after a day of being constantly pawed at, asked questions and not being given a minutes peace but I actually find if we arrange it in advance then we're more likely to stick to it. It sounds like the least unsexy and unromantic thing ever but it really works and we get to look forward to it etc.

I think sometimes when you have small children, and even older children you need to plan these things otherwise it's easy to fall out of the habit.

DD is almost five months and we haven't had sex since the day before she was born only managed about 7 times throughout the whole pregnancy?m! I was/am so tired and pregnancy and breast feeding have killed my libido ! Poor DH somehow thinks that when we start having sex again it'll be kinkier than ever... ever the optimist!! ;)

I feel better after being intimate with DH and I don't just mean having Sex. It's easy to forget how important it is to cherish each other post children. When we do make time for each other it really lifts our spirits, it has such a positive effect on our relationship.

This is so so true.

None at the moment, hubby is waiting for a circumcision and we can't do anything in case we cause some damage. I went off it completely during both my pregnancies, but between we were doing it 3/4 nights a week. His op can't come soon enough!

Crikey...we used to do it all the time - since DC2 it has slowed RIGHT down as mornings (my fav time) are now rudely interrupted by one or both children! I hope to get back to once per week... My libido pretty low right now due to tiredness and BF hormones which doesn't help. Luckily my OH is hot or we wouldn't do it at all! ;)

Absolutely not jealous of those who do it daily here. I know OH would like it more often, but I'd like to not get up almost every fecking night for 4 yrs with the children while he snores! (Sorry sleep is still more desired here)

Seriously though on holiday it's every other day or so, but not on holiday it varies between a few times a month (rare) to three times in the last six months. In our defence oh had an operation and then I became very ill with a chest infection that wiped me out. We do get out of the habit. That's said we do other things that fit in better with not waking light sleeping children up if you catch my drift

Imwithspud you are so right about being pawed!! I'm touched all day long by the kids, and sometimes it's nice to be left alone. (Sorry OH)

About once a month or a bit less. Don't believe the average is once a week or more for those with young kids, when do people have time?!!! I don't mean I'm disputing it, I mean that people are more likely to post if they're going for it most nights. Our kids don't sleep but even if they did I think it'd still be more like once a week than most nights!

DS is 18 months. DH is Deputy Head and knackered. We usually manage it twice at the weekend and once through the week.

More during school holidays, less towards the end of a term. Both 37, been together 8 years.

When ours were young yes we were tired but managed several times a week. Now with pre-teens and teens they are ALWAYS around or awake!! 3/4 times a month if we are lucky. Both in our mid 40s been together 15 years and have come to conclusion we sometimes prefer a quite night in watching a movie without kids rather than jumping into bed :)

quiet*

Four times a week or so. I'm 54, been with OH 20 years. Sex has never been better.

Omg you all sound like rabbits ...... Mid thirties here been together 21 years and about once every month or two , normally lazy sex which takes minimal effort from me and always listening out for ds who is 15 as if he heard it would be cringe worthy

I'm early 30's. Dc1 is 2, dc2 due imminently. Sex not been had since conception. We had sex maybe 4 times last year and before that not since dc1 conception.
On my part, there's only so much asking and getting rejected you can take.

It used to be ok, was never great but dh had a bereavement about 5 years ago and has been weird ever since. If we do do it, it's a perfunctory 10 minutes prod and nipple twiddling which leaves me feeling revolting so I'd rather not bother. I wanted another child which is why I tried to force it last year. Dh hasn't initiated anything for about 5 years and won't even think about foreplay anymore.

This thread is good. Im very nosey and always think ' i wonder how often other couples do it ' we do it every other day , every day to sometimes going a week without it. I have times where im horny, but DC around ( 11 & 5 ) then by the time we get to bed im shattered and the moments passed. Other times i really could just go without.
Whilst this conversation is going ahead does anyone else have the Mirena and finds their sex drive is lower ? Ive read a few articles about it but wondered anyone else finds the same .....

Early 40s, been together 12 years, and generally have sex once a fortnight, more if on holiday. We used to do it a lot more, but both knackered most of the time now. We're very intimate and affectionate, so I don't worry - if that tapered off I would be really vlmcerned.

This is piv sex? Don't those of you shagging on a daily basis get sore? Here it's maybe once a month.