Grammar schooling and the local community

[Cantdohair]

My son is just entering Yr 6 at primary school. We live in a large village in a relatively affluent area with both a primary and secondary school in walking distance.

A big part of the reason we moved here was to be part of a community and so far that has very much been the case. My son has really lucked out with his year group and they are a really strong group of friends who he could theoretically stay with through secondary school. They could all walk in together etc....it all looked very idyllic in my head! (Although I do recognise friendships change a lot at secondary level and they make new friends etc).

Unfortunately I underestimated the grammar school impact. It varies year to year but it looks as though all of his close friends bar one will sitting their 11+. They have all been tutored for some time, are bright, and stand a very good chance of passing. My son is aware of this but is not sitting it himself - this was a joint decision and we don't feel grammar school is right for him. I must admit though, I had underestimated how many of his friends would be sitting it. With the exam in a few weeks we are at peak 11+ fervour amongst parents and peers and it is really starting to bother me.

There is just so much snobbery about it and I just feel really sad that my son will miss out on the secondary school experience I thought he would have within the village that we live. The secondary school in the village is a good school, the results aren't amazing but I suspect this is more the grammar impact rather than the teaching and it has a lovely feel and a great pastoral side. I know its idealistic but it would just be so nice if they could all just go to the same school. I'm sure my son will be fine - he is far less bothered than me (eye roll) - I just feel sad about the whole system and what feels like a lack of loyalty to each other and the community. I'm not sure what I'm looking for really - just some reassurance that I am not crazy for feeling this way!

Ok - I get it. You're not interested in an actual, evidence based discussion, you aren't willing to engage in actual evidence that challenges your world view, you make sweeping statements that you refuse to provide any evidence for beyond people you know and what they've said, and now you're actively lying about what I have and haven't said.

I wish you well.

You have not provided any solid evidence based on statistics with the information witch legitimate government source with solid sample pool, how it is measures. You provided that dubious report that just had a statement that children in catholic schools are rich that doesn't base it on anything. Sweeping statement. Before you privided the famous anti grammar website that has been there for years with outdated information. No specific admissions to specific sample schools and then demographics.
UK has much less deprivation than 90 percent of the world. Yes, it exist everywhere even in UK but still milions have flocked to UK for the better life because as compared to most countries it is better.