DD given a Prefect role on a 'probationary' basis - singled out for not complying with school rules, which is news to us

[hmcAsWas]

Parents evening a few weeks ago. All favourable - dd works hard in class is meeting expected targets etc. No negative feedback.

Pupils were recently asked to apply if they wanted a prefect role. All those who applied were given prefect roles - with dd and one of her friends held back and spoken to separately. They were both told that they were on probation for half a term and their prefect roles would only be made substantive if they could prove themselves. Apparently they are not complying with school rules.

DD was aghast - apparently she rolls up her skirt too high. She has been told about this by her form teacher and she rolls it back down again when asked and has been complying without being asked recently. She and every other girl who has been selected as Prefects all do this - including the head girl, and dd is adamant she is no worse than anyone else. DD has complained to me previously that her Form teacher does not like her (or her friend) and is harder on her (and her friend) than on her peers and does not appear to be consistent or fair minded. She has given me a couple of recent examples.

It seems that dd now has this sword of Damocles over her and is sure her role wont be made substantive when the half term is up because she thinks her Form teacher will be looking to find fault

What to do?

Maybe your dd rolls her skirt shorter than the Head girl and others, but hopefully the FT can clarify re her reasons for the probationary period.

I think if you ask for advice on a public forum, you can expect to get a range of ideas and advice. If you don't want this adivce and you're going to do whatever you feel like, don't post.
The comment re: the report - no, we don't need an account of how she's doing in every subject Good Luck and better luck to the school if you refuse to work with them.

I've posted for advice before and completely changed my opinions and approach based on the input from other posters. I guess this hasn't happened on this occasion ....

And I did want the advice - it has helped clarify things for me (i.e. that I have heard nothing to persuade me that I am wrong)

Although to be there have been some very constructive posts too. I am probably overly irritated by a handful of very dismissive posts - I'm only human!

...and growing tired of this now. You must all be bored insensible by now! I'm off for a bit - Happy Mothering Sunday everyone

I think your daughter should hand in her probationary prefect badge as she clearly doesn't get it. She sounds sneaky and conniving as well as a pain in the backside. The 2 girls clearly egg each other on and in amongst their childish behaviour they have skewed visions on their versions of events.

Previous post is a case in point - it gets a huge from me

I have taught many before whom in lessons do everything that is brilliant and their report states this; behaviour and attitude outside of lessons can be horrendous but as a subjrct teacher im not at liberty to voice this as my report has to be subject based. The form tutor tends to have the true reflection of behaviour and attitude overall

hmc

From what you have posted you are right to chase this.
As a form tutor this is what they are there for.
As a head of year, it is something that is definitely part of the job.

Reading through the thread again, your dd isn't just going to be a prefect she is possibly going to be the school's sports captain.
This is a fairly prodigious post given that many pupils in the school will be looking up to her.

It is possible that they are wanting to make sure that she understands how important the post is.

Okay noted - good points. Perhaps the report doesn't cover everything. At least talking to school will fully inform me.

Yes it is a prestigious role Boney - and yes it is reasonable that they need to be confident that she understands this.

What you are telling us here, OP, is that your dd spends an inordinate amount of time looking over her shoulder to see if others are not being as bad as she is- or else where would you have all this information from?

If this attitude comes across in her general demeanour, then I can well see why her teachers are in two minds as to whether she has the maturity to be a prefect.

Only she can prove them wrong.

You want two teachers to give up their time, weekly, to review your DD's behaviour with her, based on her being asked to keep her skirt at the right length and remain outside when told to do so? Have you any idea how many more pressing things they will have to do?

Op said it's a private school. It would be a ridiculous request in my dd's comp, but I reckon in a private school it's more reasonable.

TheColonelAdoresPuffins:

Only if class sizes are very considerably smaller. I am a core subject teacher and form tutor (may leave) and I would only have time to do this if I ignored the discussions I have to have with students about serious behaviour problems, absence, academic performance etc. This really wouldn't be my priority.

Are you in a private school?

No, that's what I am saying - I agree with you that this might be possible in a private school if my form of 18 students in a comprehensive and my classes of 31 translated into a form of 9 and classes of 15/16.

Yes. Don't leave teaching by the way. You are needed! Remember you are always going to hear the negative stuff on mnet as people don't tend to post when all is going swimmingly. When they did the ofsted parent view thingy at dd's school 99% of parents said their child was happy, but the teachers probably hear loads of moans, but just don't hear from the silent happy majority!

I don't think this is just about a rolled-up skirt. I see lots of parents on here complaining about schools seemingly suddenly objecting to their child's behaviour when they think everything's been fine.
The truth is, it won't usually be a sudden thing. Many pupils just tread on the right side of the line, and are good about removing themselves from the scenes of any crimes at the opportune moment.
When selecting pupils for positions of responsibility, you're looking for kids who've never been anywhere near the line at all, and moreover, go out of their way to go above and beyond to help others and be general all-round good-eggs. So there are those kids (and possibly your dd is one of them??) who, whilst they haven't specifically done anything awful (worth reporting to parents), they also haven't been noted as having done anything wonderful either - or at least, as wonderful as those who have been selected. These posts are heavily competed for.

TheColonelAdoresPuffins:

thedearoctopus -yes but dd has represented her school at national and regional level in sport and art, and has volunteered to marshall at Prep level athletic events etc, so she has gone above and beyond

Yes it is a private school with small class sizes.

Any how I should get the low down later, Deputy Head has already rung me (unfortunately I was out so she left a message and will be phoning again later). I am looking forward to a positive, constructive discussion, and I will behave myself and keep an open mind. I have had dealings with her before, nothing behavioural! - but related to dd's anxiety, and she has always been helpful

I've sent her this drawing by text to lighten the atmosphere (although not to make light of the matter) reminding her comply

to comply

Shit - should clarify! I've sent that text to my dd, not the Deputy Head. Sorry - badly explained

Hahaha! The deputy head might have found the drawing helpful. You might find it emailed out to all parents as a handy visual aid!