My son MUST have HAIR CUT for secondary school!

[strewthy13]

We have been informed that we MUST get our sons hair cut before he goes up to secondary school this year. If we don't the school will refuse to let him attend. We have written to the school and quoted the sexual discrimination act etc but they will not budge. The school rules say hair no longer than the collar and will not be tolerated. Hair off or him off. We are really not happy about this and needless to say our son is devastated to say the least. Our child has had long blonde hair since he started to walk...thoughts and ideas would be very much appreciated. If anyone has had the same experience that would be helpful too!

He has to put it up in a ponytail and not have it loose ?

Or he could get it cut?

Or go to a different school?

Or you could home educate?

Lots of choices

It's probably a safety thing. Can't he just put it in a ponytail?

Can he wear it tied up? Or must it be cut?

Ultimately if you want him in that school he has to follow the rules. If you frame it as a positive and look at hairstyles online etc he may be more open to it? Is he picking up on your unhappiness over the whole thing?

Have they given the option of tying it up so its above his collar or are they just saying it has to go altogether?

Don't back down. There isn't a good reason for this. What about Sikh boys? Transgender? Why can't boys have long hair ?? Move schools of needs be, but don't back down. Contact your mp.

tie it back. They'll probably drop it.

Ignore it. They can't discriminate like that.

DS had really long hair until recently.

What about a Jon Snow style man bun??

We live in a world where its ok for armed police to undress a woman on a public beach because the law says she is wearing too many clothes. And you are worried about a little hair cut?

dickie it can't be a safety thing if girls can have long hair there. If the rule is the same for the girls fair enough but I bet it's not.

Choose a different school with different rules.
Did you not realise when you chose that school that they have certain uniform/appearance rules?

Oh yawn confusion
It's perfectly fine to have personal issues that affect only you whilst there is worse stuff going on in the world. Bigger shit doesn't mean the smaller stuff isn't still a problem.

Is it an all boys' school? With no Sikh's?

Contact Board of Trustees or whoever tops the persons that wrote the letter. It is an absurd rule and your son should not be made to change his hair in order to attend school. Long hair is acceptable for girls, it should be the same for boys.

I'd be surprised it they didn't let him have it in a ponytail, plait or bun (depending how long it is) to keep it above the collar.

you knew the deal when you signed up
get it cut

That's ridiculous.

I could see why they would have a hair tied back rule especially for certain lessons but not a length rule.

It should be the same for boys as girls.

Man buns have come into fashion now.

if the school is traditional on this issue you might find that this is the beginning of a long acrimonious relationship that will impact on your son
Is it a trad boys grammar school kind of thing?

My son was told the same 3 years ago, that he had to have it cut. We still haven't managed to go to the barbers! They have girls with waist length hair who tie it up (sometimes grr) so he just wears his tied up. They can't discriminate like that. What is the schools policy on girls with long hair? He should be allowed to decide how he has his hair, after all how is long hair going to affect his ability to learn.

Going to school is about education, part of that is learning to follow the rules. Even ones we don't like. Maybe you should home educate.

What if he was trans gender? Would they be able to keep the rule if he was pre op for example? Get him to turn up with big bunches with ribbons!

Ds has long hair. Atm he attends an on line school/home ed. Where the length of his hair has been an issue with schools in the past he has been referred to the girls rules on long hair that it must be tied back. Only one HM has ever said he needed to cut it. He agreed to it reluctantly but it became like a barrier between him and the school. He left after a year for other reasons and it took him 2 years before he summoned the confidence to go back into school environment.

Hair for some is linked to their confidence.

Did you not know the rules when you chose the school? Or have they only recently imposed it?

Is there another school he could go to or will you have to home educate? It seems an extreme reaction given that he will probably want to cut it soon anyway. I would just get him to tie it up properly or cut it.

Ivydale rules are there to be challenged not blindly followed

Can he not have a pony tail ( sensibly banded), tucked into the neck of his shirt?

Rules are there for a reason ( heath & safety for instance but not exclusively) and there are usually compromises to be met.

You might well have a case for sexual discrimination, but I do think you need to act in a responsible 'adult' way about it ( ie no daft thing like ribbons)