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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

In shock, just another one

636 replies

fairygodmotherto3 · 08/07/2010 14:38

I've changed my name for this, please don't shout troll at me, I feel too stunned about this myself. Someone dropped a letter through the door at lunchtime, no idea who, from my dh. Says he's not coming home, he's leaving me because I'VE been having an affair! It said he'd suspected for a while but couldn't take any more. I haven't, no secret meetings, no even mildly interesting texts, no idea when I'd have time to anyway. Tried phoning him, no answer and daren't phone his work, I don't know what to do. I thought we were ok, probably not the perfect marriage but ticking along alright. Got to pick up dd's soon, what do I tell them? Feel so sick and dizzy.

OP posts:
huffythethreadslayer · 13/07/2010 15:13

Another one here. Hope the solicitors went well and that you're managing with things day to day. I don't imagine anyone on here would feel snubbed if you didn't email back for a while, but I know everyone is ready to support you/listen when you need them.

Take care.

mathanxiety · 13/07/2010 17:02

Thinking of you and your girls.

digggers · 13/07/2010 17:03

the week after my dad left we got a dog. Twas a fantastic focus for all of us. Loved that dog so much. I was 9, my sister 13.

I vote for a dog!

MrsY · 13/07/2010 18:54

Hello, fairy my love.

Hope things at the solicitors went well and they were able to answer your questions re: access to the house and money and so on.

In terms of the access to the house, I know you can't change the locks but you can ask for his keys, and you can also use a chain when you are at home.

I'm sure things will be weird for your daughters, but it will get easier. I'm sure their teachers have experienced something like this before so will know what to do, and their will be other girls whose parents are not together who may be able to offer support/advice.

I think a puppy/cat is a good idea in theory as it will you give you another focus, but don't do anthing too quickly and don't forget that they may require a lot of attention (especially if they are rescue) which may not be good for the times you need to switch off and sleep. Give it a week or so.

When someone is greiving (which you are) they are advised not to make major decisions for 6 months. This includes new furry family members.

Hope you can get some rest and we will all be here for your feedback from the solicitor.

xxx

livethedream · 13/07/2010 20:04

Puppy is lovely idea - esp if you were already thinking about it! (Agree, lots of responsibility - but havign to walk it would keep you going and the walking itself is good for lifting your mood!)

countingto10 · 13/07/2010 20:08

I would advise a word of caution against the puppy idea for a few weeks. We had a 4 month old puppy in situ when my DH did this to me. It was an added stress to everything else that was going on and I couldn't cope with a boisterous puppy as well so I had to rehome him - cue more distressed DC. He went to a very good home though .

anniebear · 13/07/2010 21:17

How awful, just read the whole thread, what an idiot HE IS

THINKING OF YOU AND YOU dd'S LOTS XXXX

Mouseface · 13/07/2010 21:52

fariy

I should imagine that you're rather drained today. The reality of dealing with the soliciotr, all of the 'what nows' in black and white as it were must have been extremely hard for you.

I hope that you are snuggling with the girls in bed. I hope that they are as ok as they can be given what's going on.

Try to get some sleep tonight. If you can't sleep, at least try to lie down or close your eyes.

Rest.

Today was another huge step forward. You are amazing and you will get there. You will. xxxx

fairygodmotherto3 · 13/07/2010 23:11

Wanted to update but feeling very drained. Had some wine when dds had gone to bed and that knocked me out for a few hours. Saw solicitor - really haven't got the energy to say much but went better than I thought, filled out endless forms, he said taking the savings won't drop me in it legally but will all be looked at in any settlement so may have to be paid back on paper but unlikely considering what the split is likely to be. Depending on what he contests/argues a divorce could be very smooth or difficult - not sure I care right now. H replied to email and called this evening to talk to the girls, he wants to call them every night after work and have them one day at the weekend, he couldn't speak to them tonight as they went to bed straight after dinner and didn't want to drag them up again, and I kept the conversation short so haven't sorted anything out with him. I suppose his reply was expected - saying it was silly for him to 'warn' me he was coming round and again saying stuff about arrangements being pointless because this was temporary, unless I wanted to make it permanent - once again it's all my fault. Can't be bothered to even think of a reply.

Thanks huffy - really wish everyone knew just how much this thread is helping me, feeling so helped by all the advice and support, just barely know what to put back.

DDs are really stressy today, school seems to be taking it out of them too mcuh now, definitely time for a duvet day tommorrow, am feeling just slightly less of a zombie, more sobby & angry now so maybe progress. Feel so much better putting the phone bill stuff etc to one side, was driving myself mad thinking about details adn I don't have enough energy to care. Not getting a puppy right now for anyone that's worried, although hadn't thought of a bunny, but the thought is nice.

OP posts:
mamas12 · 13/07/2010 23:38

aww well it is exhausting.

I would suggest go to bed stay in bed and do not get out of bed until tomorrow lunchtime at least just for snacks and get straight back into bed.

Have den/duvet day with the girls you sound as if you need it.

big un mn I know hugs

PurpleOne · 14/07/2010 02:18

Just read all 23 pages of this. Really wish you well FG.
Duvet days are great for the soul, esp when you all lounge in pajamas too! DVDs, crap food, comfy sofa and just LOAF.
You sound exhausted - hope you are resting well right now.

A few words jumped out at me in your last post. 'once again its all my fault'
Darling, this is NOT YOUR FAULT. TwatH CHOSE to do this, he CHOSE to do these shitty things. He CHOSE to walk away, he CHOSE to have a fuck buddy and he CHOSE to accuse you of an imaginary affair.

Just cope with today, worry about tomorrow, tomorrow.

(((hugs)))

mathanxiety · 14/07/2010 06:34

When he complains to you that something you want is 'silly' what he means is that he didn't see that one coming, and is perturbed by your ability to assert yourself, as it is a very unwelcome dose of reality for him. It interrupts his little fantasy.

Stick to your guns about his coming and going to the family home, and please do not budge. He is testing your boundaries. If he shows up unannounced, tell him you will not admit him and remind him that you have made it clear that you require him to have your permission. If he kicks up some sort of fuss, you are within your rights to call the police I know this may seem like overkill, but you never know. Please don't let this slide make him stick to this requirement of yours. It's a very important hint by him as to whether he has any intention of playing by the rules, or showing any signs of respect for you, or whether he thinks he can have everything he wants, his own way. He will teat you, and he will not like it when you resist his pressure, but be assertive (not necessarily angry or aggressive, just state what you want calmly and firmly.)

You really can insist, and there is nothing he can do about it, because it's a very reasonable request. You have not told him he cannot under any circumstances come to his own house, you have just requested advance notice. Perfectly reasonable. And watch his reaction. You already have an inkling that he is pushing back. That's that sense of entitlement of his kicking in, the same sense of entitlement that made him think he could find himself a fuckbuddy (boak), leave the way he did, speak to you so coldly on that dreadful day last week, have a friend deliver an insulting letter through the door out of the blue...

I would be very hesitant to agree to anything he wants wrt visitation until ordered by a court. He has clearly put some thought into how things will be (he has had time, after all, to give it all some thought). You are more likely to end up with some sort of every other weekend visitation schedule, which is standard, and if I were you I would tell him you will be consulting a solicitor and will get back to him, and until then, no solid visitation arrangement will apply. He can just keep on asking you if he wants to come over (and I hope you are also telling him no phone calls at random times to you), and keep in contact with the girls over the phone at certain times, but that they will not put their lives on hold waiting for him to call -- they will go to parties or other activities as arranged. this phoning thing could very well turn out to be a way for him to seriously annoy you and try to get the girls' lives revolving around the time he calls.

Take every opportunity you are presented with to burst his bubble.

And yes, you are right, the idea that the ball is completely in your court now, that you hold the future in your hands typical pathetic effort to shrug off his (100%) responsibility for this. You do control what happens to the extent that you can fight for the best possible life now for you and the girls, but is this upheaval or any future divorce your fault, your responsibility? NO. And he is a coward to suggest this. A cold and calculating coward.

Hoping you had a restful night, and hope the duvet day goes nicely. xxxxx

dietstartstmoz · 14/07/2010 07:01

Hope you're OK FG. Your story reminded me of my lovely sister, her shit of an ex came home one day, told her he didn't want to be with her any more then fucked off, literally leaving her holding the baby. He has appeared to have a personality transplant, which we now know if down to drugs/steroids etc, but he has accused her of affairs(non existent) and he suddenly had another woman immediately after their split. That was a coupld of yr ago now and she has moved on, and is doing well. I'm sure you will get lots of support in RL from family, friends,and Mn too. Take all the support you can get, take it one day at a time and you will be fine too, in time. X

dawntigga · 14/07/2010 07:22

FG hope the duvet day goes well today - maybe sneak out during the day and buy things that aren't v good for you and the girls as a one off?

CakeHelpsWithManyIshoosTiggaxx

BalloonSlayer · 14/07/2010 08:19

Sounds like you are doing fab! Well done you.

Do you want him back, Fairy?

If not, then when he says "unless you want to make it permanent" you can react with the utmost astonishment and say "But of COURSE it's permanent! I would never have you back after what you have done and neither would any sane woman. > I can't believe you think this is temporary after the way you have behaved."

(If you do want him back then that won't really work I guess)

Another useful line: "You seem to be trying to make me the bad guy, H. News flash: YOU are the bad guy." (Suggested continuation: " A man who runs out on his wife and children and gets someone else to put an insulting letter through their door will always be the bad guy to anyone who knows him, however he tries to kid himself." )

I shouldn't keep suggesting things to say but there is so much I wish I'd said to MY ex-H. Must be projecting

Longtalljosie · 14/07/2010 09:01

I agree with everyone else. The mantra is "you've done this, not me". Repeat until it finally sinks in.

MrsY · 14/07/2010 09:30

Morning Fairy

Hope you got some rest last night. I'm sure a duvet day will do a lot to help you and the girls. Enjoy yourselves. Eat little and often. Drink lots of water. Do you have Sky or Virgin and can rent a movie without leaving the house?

Write a message and post it on your mirror or by your bed - THIS IS HIS FAULT. You are not to blame. You have behaved with dignity and grace throughout this whole thing.

You are totally within your rights to ask him for space and time to compute what has happened. It is not 'silly' to ask him to ask for your permission before he tries to go round. It is simple curtesy.

He is trying to push you to make decisions when you are still not thinking clearly. Make sure he knows you are calmly and maturly thinking things through and you will make decisions in your own time.

I forgot how old your girls are; but keep talking to them about what is happening. Ask if they want to see/talk to their father. It wouldn't take much for them to resent you (often the parent who stays in the home is seen as the bad guy).

In terms of visitation I would say that one day a weekend is most sensible at the moment. Whether he is at a hotel or with AW, he can't have them overnight, and some time to yourself will be really useful atm, without them being away from you for too long. Make sure you're happy with where he is going/what he is doing with them.

I know that he has treated you appalingly, but he is their father and if he wants contact, don't get in the way too much, it won't reflect well on you.

The anger is a good sign, embrace your emotions and become stronger.

You are doing so well, and things will get a little easier every day. Take care. xxx

missedith01 · 14/07/2010 09:45

Why is it silly if it's what you want? After his outrageous ehaviour, if he really wanted to be reconciled, I would have thought it would be an easy way for him to show respect - for you and for his family - and build bridges. Sound like he expects there to be no consequences for him at all.

Mouseface · 14/07/2010 09:54

fairy

Hello.

Ah, a duvet day. Wonderful given that it appears to be autumn already!

I have to say that his responses are the norm when you take the control away from him. Well done!

Fabulous advice from maths and MrsY so no point in me repeating that.

Getting angry is good but expect the tears to remain. It's all so frustrating. Just when you think you've turned a corner, feelings come flooding back.

You may find over the next few weeks that you'll have triggers. Songs on the radio, smells, tv adds, random things that you'd never normally notice will suddenly make you cry.

Concentrate on the girls today. And you. Have a picnic in bed. Put some DVDs on. Just veg out and snuggle.

Re the girls seeing him, I wouldn't stop him to be honest. I'd let him see them one day at the weekends for now and for a pre agreed time. BUT make it clear to him that you are speaking to your solicitor to arrange a more permanent structure for when he can see them in the future.

He is quite deluded isn't he? Thinking that he can just swan back in still? You have clearly spooked him He obviously thought, 'I'll confess to some half fabricated nonsense that she may or may not buy, kiss and make up, all will be grand.'

Fool. There is still more to this than meets the eye.

Stand your ground. Insist that he respects your wishes and gets prior permission before he comes to the house or he doesn't come at all. He can't just pop in as and when.

More than anything, it's not fair on the girls for him to just show up. They need routine more than ever now.

Anyway, enough of my waffling, have a fab day with the girls.

Keep going. xxxx

ChazsBarmyArmy · 14/07/2010 10:01

I have been lurking. I am stunned at your H crap behaviour. Well done for moving things forward. I am glad to hear that you will have a duvet day today sometimes when we have a bad shock we need to hibernate a bit to process the emotions.
These are the points that stand out for me
HE LEFT YOU
HE MADE FALSE ACCUSATIONS
HE HAS /IS CHEATING
HE HAS ABANDONED THE FAMILY HOME

So
He has no rights to expect anything from you at all.
You do not have to fit in with his needs or wants he has to fit in with yours.
He has no right to come into the house without your prior permission which you can withdraw at any point if his behaviour is abusive or unreasonable.

msboogie · 14/07/2010 14:17

"A man who runs out on his wife and children and gets someone else to put an insulting letter through their door will always be the bad guy to anyone who knows him, however he tries to kid himself"

This is something that needs ramming home to him again and again.

He will always be the man who did that awful thing. Why in hell would anyone want him back?

diddl · 14/07/2010 14:31

OP-hope things are going OK for you.

Have I missed something?

He wants to come back saying it was never to be permanent?

Or have I misunderstood?

Mouseface · 14/07/2010 14:37

Diddl.

When H came to se fairy last Saturday, this is what was said -

"he thinks we need time alone, him in a holiday flat so we can both talk about what we both need to change (!) and then he could move back in again - he even said he'd tried to time it so we had the summer in just over a week, wouldn't have to stress the girls at school! Seems to think this will be some nice little break so we can both 're-evaluate'".

He still thinks that this isn't going to be a permanent thing and that he will be welcomed back into the family fold in a few weeks once fairy has ended her alleged affair and got over her mid-life crisis.

I think that he may have fallen and banged his head. He is awfully deluded.

diddl · 14/07/2010 15:01

Thanks MouseFace-I had missed that

That is weird.

What in God´s name did he think OP was going to do when he sent a note saying he was leaving?

I suppose this is now so that he can say it´s not his fault & he "only wanted a break".

What an unbelievably callous *

Mouseface · 14/07/2010 15:47

diddl - Bingo!!

This is how I imagine the conversation will go when he is in the pub with his mates, carryiing on as 'normal' and he finally realises that fairy, is in actual fact, deadly serious about never taking him back.

'I made a mistake but it was years and years and years ago, so it doesn't really count but I know that she had an affair so I gave her space to sort it all out, get rid of him but I wanted to go back but she said no becasue she is a meany and not very nice to me and I've done nothing wrong and ............ she is being so unreasonable'

Well, boo fucking hoo. He should've thought about the consequences of his actions but chose not to.

fairy

Sorry for my little outburst above.

I hope that you never take him back. I hope that at some point he will have the balls to be completely honest with you and just release you from the torment that he has created.

You deserve so much more and so do your girls.

xx

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