Sex Drive clash :o)

[Littleblue]

If anyone who was on a previous thread reads this..the ironies rather amusing!..I'm seeing a lovely man..he's everything i could want , funny ,attractive and intelligent..
We "sing from the same song sheet"?BUT...he is apathetic in bed...very low drive , and the sex we do have is invariably instigated and driven by me...I have a very redblooded sex drive.How likely (given we have been together only a couple of months)is this to be an enormous problem long term?..

Bye Shiny...

OMFG!!!!!!! you didnt..ROFL!!!

Didnt he notice you turning pages????

I did
I'd say a fake "oh!" nad flay my arm out to turn teh page

im CRYIN with laughter now!!!!

if he has tiny balls and is a fitness freak has he knackered his nadgers by taking steroids at some point? Scarily common cause of permanently wrecked libido

oh, I hate feathery strokers

I have posted very seriously about this topic before

I am glad to find some like-minded women who also get seriously pissed off at being handled like a waft of fucking fairy dust

He's not a fitness 'freak' he just cycles alot for pleasure...'nackered nadgers'..i like it lol...
Lmao at Heat magazine..god help mama if it was 'practical parenting'

OMG!! i LOVE you Anyfucker!!

Ah it was pre DC

I can't remember which mag! would have been heat-esque though, no doubt

I would be very annoyed with a FS now, I'm very vocal about what I don't want!

Ahem... if a testicularly-average bloke might interrupt this (depressingly funny, if there's such a thing) vivisection of some poor chap who probably thinks everything's fine, and respond to the OP: my wife and I have a similar issue, although not as extreme.

I just have to remember that she's going to be in the mood for it more than I am, and she has to remember that it doesn't mean I don't love her or that I find her unattractive. We don't always get it right, but in practice, from my side, this mostly means actively thinking about when might be a good time for sex (not quite scheduling it, bit looking out for opprtunities, whether or not I'm in the mood). I almost always find that I get in the mood before too long, even if I wasn;t to start with. And on the bright side, it's forced us to both push our boundaries a bit more than we might otherwise have done, which has been fun. Bottom line is, you both need to be gently honest with each other (as well as cruelly honest on MN).

Sorry if that was too serious - I'll let you get back to destroying what little remains of this (thankfully anonymous) man's credibility now...

Oh..now i feel bad ..actually , i have thought through pretty much what you describe as a way of dealing with this..added to another posters view its possible our sex drives may well settle into something aproximating a match..or even a compromise?

My point,besides the drive level is about the laziness..(thank god for anonymity)..i wake him in a most pleasant manner on occasion..as most men i imagine enjoy...as he does , but he never returns any of these advances despite his enjoyment...i wonder if its a case of "she wants it,she started it..so i'l just lie here and enjoy it"..never reciprocates you see...oh,im wrong..once

He rarely kisses me even..just 'pecks'

(I even have a new paranoia..halitosis lol)

If it helps, my wife and I just took some time to think about and then talk through how we imagined it made the other feel. We didn't get it right, but as an exercise in empathy it was pretty useful, opened up the debate, and nipped some brewing problems in the bud.

Of course, having just given birth, her sex drive is officially hovering at around "zilch" right now, so maybe there's your solution - have lots of babies (although perhaps that brings you back to square one).

No ruddy chance..i have FOUR! lol...from 5 years up to adulthood!

I actually don't feel that i can talk t him like that yet...wether that sums it up in a nutshell , i don't know.
He and I enjoy everything else together..how much of his lovelife has been damaged/destroyed in the past i can only speculate.He holds my hand when we go out...thats something?

It's not nothing... Good luck, anyway. If I was going to get all psychological on you, I'd say that maybe you're looking for problems that needn't be problems (yet) and perhaps you should just see what happens...?

You both have a valid point..but Gibran , there's a fairly fundamental flaw here..shinys right..a matter of weeks into a relationship , and we have two very different animals (no pun intended)

You are funny Shiny..i'm not renowned for patience,but i guess i must be!

Congrats on the baby btw Gibran

Fair enough - isn't the question then really: "Is this relationship worth expending the effort to fix this problem?"

And that's about other factors.

Will the problem just get better on its own? Unlikely.

Should you ditch or try to fix? Only you know.

Agree.
send the text.
if he runs for the hills, you've lost nothing but some tiny balls.
If he comes round and does you until you can't walk, bingo.