Srtraw Poll - What's wrong with sleeping with somone on the first date?

[Janos]

I think if you want to and feel comfortable, what's the big deal?

It still seems to be a bit taboo and I'm wondering why.

Interested to hear other people's thoughts anyway.

who said i wanted the bloke in question for any longer than that shag?

i have my needs that a rabbit does not always fulfil

cant say ive been compared in groups, i dont tend to make my way through them and their mates

i think that would say more about their attitude than mine tbh

Fair 'nuff lou. I just don't want to get that intimate with a man I hardly know. I mean, for all you know he could wipe his arse forwards and piss in the sink.

I like to make sure they're bloody good enough first.

Rhubarb- the blokes you used to hang out with sound like total arses.

God forbid I'd ever be desperate enough to yearn for THEIR respect.....

FWIW I have four older brothers and none of them have ever seen a problem with respecting a woman after first-date sex. But they're decent human beings.

No shodan, just young men in their twenties having a good time.

The band however were not my group of friends. I knew them as one of my female friends once went out with the lead singer.

It's not about earning someone's respect, it's about self-respect too. It's about telling myself that I'm far too special to be just given away to the first man that comes knocking. I want bloody character references and a hygiene certificate!

Seriously though, you don't know where half of them have been.

I wouldn't knock anyone who has sex on a first date, it's none of my business. But this thread did ask for our opinions and that's mine.

You may disagree with me, but don't have a go at me for having different opinions to you, that's what makes life varied.

well i do not go out and pull random guys ive never met in my life, my one nighters are with people i have got to know

but if i want sex i dont see why i need to justify it to anyone

and your friends do sound like arses cos the men i know dont behave like that

There is a singer called Jenny Talia, you may not have heard of her BUT she is hilariously honest one of her songs is called Nice Girls...here is a snippet of it..

Nice girls wear twin set tops
And sensible comfy shoes
Not mini skirts and fishnet stockings
And follow-me fuck-me boots
Nice girls stay pure and sweet
Until their wedding night
I?d rather try before I buy
So form a queue off to me right

Makes me laugh..

Bck to OP
I slept with DP on first date 4 yrs, 1 ds and lots of fun later we are still going strong.

I slept with DH after a couple of hours, so far so good!

I have to say though that the three other relationships of any significance that I've had did not start that way.

Must be all about personalities/chemistry at the end of the day?

blimey, bint, that was fast

how did you manage that ?

We'd been having a girl's night in, then we went out at midnight already quite plastered tipsy and met DH. He came home with me and didn't leave. We didn't get around to having a date until after the sex.

I think it was fate, I wouldn't change how it happened...

Cinderella - you shall go to the speaks balls.

Rhubarb- wasn't aware that I had a go at you anywhere. Apologies if you took it like that.

I did have a go at the blokes who thought it was funny to treat a girl like a piece of meat though.

Hang on though. Sleeping with someone on the first night is not the same as sleeping around, is it?

You could only ever have been out with three men and slept with them all on the first date and have years between each. Hardly a model of promiscuity.

As men who sleep with a woman and then sneer about her to their mates...such behaviour reeks of immaturity and double standards. I can well believe it goes on though unfortuantely.

TLES

Janos...I think she is hilarious and soo soo honest!!

those blokes that all slept with same girl and talked about it... total arses.how can you ... as a female... call these blokes anything remotely resembling friends/associates... what appaling behaviour and complete disrespect for women.

i know plenty of fellas(brothers, their friends, my friends) who think its perfectly acceptable to sleep with someone on first date if the chemistry is there... none of which would EVER dream of passing her like a piece of meat, nor would they sleep with someone their friend had slept with.

agree with janos... the op was about sleeping with someone on first date... not sleeping around, nor sleeping with strangers.

i wouldn't....

looks a bit "desparate"

Yeah I agree...desperate for a shag!

ha ha

maybe you are.....but you don't let him know that...

keep him waiting....make him desperate for you...

"Seriously though, you don't know where half of them have been"

Doesn't matter though if you both look after your sexual health and use a condom.

There are cases where women have contracted STIs from their first boyfriend. Wives from husbands who have had affairs etc.

"but if i want sex i dont see why i need to justify it to anyone"

Exactly lou!

daftpunk

within the hour.....

'scuse me guys - you are getting these blokes mixed up with my friends. I thought I made it clear that the blokes who passed that girl around (although it was her idea as she gleefully told me, to want to sleep with all of them in any order) were members of a band I knew.
That does not class them as friends.

In fact dh had a go at one of them once for making sneering remarks about a barmaid in front of her.

They are now all grown-up though, with wives and children.

And I take the point that sleeping around is not the same as sleeping on a first date, but how do you make the distinction? If you've only done it once or if you've done it loads of times? If they were proper dates of if you met in a nightclub?

Nowt wrong with holding back I say. I'm very choosy and wouldn't let any old cock up my doofer.

Ah, the magic of a snog from Reality