Why hasn't he asked me out again??!

[BEAUTlFUL]

Met this bloke online-dating. He was very keen, chased me until I agreed to go out with him. We met for dinner and had such a good time. He walked me home, brief kiss on lips.

Next day he was text-happy, arranging second date. I couldn't see him for a week, and he kept in touch, even going back to the online-dating site and sending me a really sweet message to say he missed me so much, he had to look at my photos.

Second date was lunch. I felt very shy but we had a good laugh. I did tell him that I had a couple more coffee-dates with online men coming up (and was going speeddating). Maybe that was a mistake, but it was true!

That day, he kissed me on the cheek, sent a few more texts (keen ones) then... nuthin. I've had one more text and a couple of friendly but platonic emails.

WHY???!!!! I really like him, what is going on?

Please don't tell me to "tell him you like him" as I'm too cynical. Surely if he liked me, he'd ask me out again?

Howcome you are internet dating? i have never tried it and have you got anymore lined up.

Nooo beautiful come back.

Sunny, I work from home, have two kids, DH buggered orf... I don't really know how else I'm going to meet someone. Would prefer to meet in real life, but where???

Oh, and yes: another date tomorrow night, and possibly policeman another night. There's a tasty-looking film-maker as well, from Match, who I think will ask to meet quite soon.

Don't you go out? i know it's hard, i have three, cant your mom babysit for you? while you have some time out.

oooo policeman that sounds promising

Mad

as

a

cut

snake.

mmmwine (and queenofdenial) - it a very long story and too late for your date but I do think there is a moral to the story of my disasterous inept courtship of DW. That is why I always say to anyone in the position BEAUTIFUL is in to never let a good thing slip through their fingers through lack of courage.

I met DW on University interview in December 1982 and loved her from the moment we met. I thought about her every single day after that but we didn't meet again until September 1983 when we both arrived at Oxford University as students. She did not like me at all at first but we gradually became friends as we were in the same college on the same course. I used to sit next to her in college tutorials on a saggy old sofa with our arms and legs touching and so close I could smell her perfume. It was utter torture as I was desperatley in love with DW but she did not seem to notice.

Anyway got to the summer term of the first year and I still had not had the courage to ask her out. Then to my horror another bloke invited her to go with him to a sumer ball. DW did not have a ball gown but she asked me to go with her to choose her dress. It was like the scene from Four Weddings and a Funeral and Hugh Grant helps Andy MacDowell choose her wedding dress. We even look a lot like those two actors.

DW tried on a backless silver dress. I was utterly dumbstruck and stood there in the shop with tears in my eyes looking at her knowing then what a damn fool I was and mumbled something like 'she looks beautiful' to the shop assistant. When DW went back in the changing room the assistant went in and told her that she thought I was 'very keen on her' and DW admitted to the assistant that she wished I was taking her to the ball not the bloke she was actually going with. I knew nothing of this conversation in the changing room but walked back to college with DW and as we walked our little fingers brushed together and we held hands not speaking or daring to look at each other. Eventually, we saw a friend approaching and let go of each others hands like we had been electrocuted. Nothing happened and we left for summer holiday. I was heartbroken. I only saw her once in the holiday and DWs mother noticed how I looked at DW and she told her. Again nothing happened because I didnt have the courage.

We went back to Oxford and for second year and I eventually suggested we go out for a couple of meals 'as friends' but again nothing happened. Then literally 25 years ago this week DW asked me over for a coffee in her college room and as I was leaving she pinned me against the wall and made to kiss me. I think I missed and ended up kissing her nose instead but we persevered and that was that. It had only taken 23 months to get to that stage and DW eventually express the love I had felt all along.

I nearly threw away the chance to be with DW and it would have been all my fault through lack of courage. NO one should do that.

lol " at oxford"

you had to say..

High latency reading there, ABD...

What a lovely, lovely story.

Just my cup of tea, I'm always convincing myself that my crush secretly has great longings for me and fancies me madly but he seems incapable of bloody asking me out.

queenofdenial - you could ask him round and pin him to a wall. Worked for me.

it's ok for a teenager to lack courage in these things but a bit sad if a middle aged man still does

That said I was 23 and DH 27 when we met and I was all cool, calm and collected and although he was smitten he was scared of admitting it. Fortunately I realised what a silly sod I was playing games and went to tell him how I felt. Would have been very embarassing if he'd turned round and said he wasn't keen but he was

So I can see both sides of the debate

sorry if this has moved on but it's too massive to read and the simple truth is that he's not that bothered or is acting like a fuckwit
eitherway there are 20 more fish in the sea

beautiful-def come over and join us on the 'fit and intersting men thread!

Aww ABD, how lovely! made me smile

I have a tear in my eye!

snort @ andi macdowell and hugh grant lookalikes.

UPDATE

He texted me this morning and we're going for dinner on Saturday.

Whew! I'm so relieved!!

Hu-bloody-ray!

Well done Beautiful, just be careful with your heart - remember how we girls always fall for the bad boys.

ABD was welling up reading your story.

BEAUTIFUL pmsl - perseverance. Have a great time!