Beautiful's Road to Recovery for the Recently Ditched

[BEAUTlFUL]

Dearly Be-Chucked, we are gathered here today because, for whatever reason, our man has dumped us!

Whether we were dating, cohabiting or married, we are now to use therapist-speak well effed-off about the whole business and are desperate to regain our fabulosity.

Well, this is the place! This is where we regain our positivity, our self-confidence and eventually our mojos. We might think at the moment that we'd also like to regain our men, but that might not last long, as we'll soon realise that anyone who could put us through this does not deserve us.

Come in and start regaining your brilliance! I will be setting us exercises to complete that are based vaguely on self-help books, beauy tips and Feng Shui, or we'll just have a right good bitch until we feel completely drained and sick of the sound of our ex's names. Whatever works.

Ok, Fluffy you're excused, get the rabbit (rampant) instead

Morning, oh dear just chocolate and wine took its toll on me last night & I was snoring away on the sofa by about 10pm.

Tired today as had to hoy my sorry butt into work for 7am to catch up on reports that I should have done whilst reading MN they are done now hurrah!!

Startingover you had a young sweaty painter in your bedroom and you showed restraint [hmmm] today you must try harder if not exactly throwing yourself at him you must at least indulge in rampant thoughts about him it is Friday after all

Yes we all should be taking time to enjoy our independance but I'm not so young anymore I'm on that dreadful slippy slope to 50 and it's scary!!

Morning Dumplings, I am sad to say I left the side down this morning. I awoke exhausted, as usual, however this morning I did not have to leave house as dc's have no school. I had an hr before painter due to shower & beautify myself, I decided to hop back into bed.

Next I knew, he was here, my hair was all over the place & I realised my pj's were the furthest thing from sexy possible (and of course without the bra he would have spotted I've been faking it in the tits dept). I had to think fast, the hair was unredeemable, so I just rapidly brushed teeth & threw on a dressing gown.

I've convinced myself I still look sexy in an unkempt kind of way! I've given up now & spent the morning wandering around in my dressing gown. I have to say he's growing on me by the hour, I'm enjoying the manly whistling & singing. He's great patience with the dc's. I'm off now to have a shower & indulge in a bit of sexual fantasy for a few blissful minutes!

Have fun in the shower, startingover!

On the plus side if you ever do get things off the ground he already knows what you look like first thing in the morning, unkempt sexy is this years trend anyway lol.

So what do you know about him? is he single?
Whistling and singing sounds good, patience with DC's snap him up girl

Nickname, welcome to the fold.

Loobie, that was my exact thought, he's seen me at my worst now so at least that's out of the way. Anyway, here's his stats, single, 35, good bod, loves dc's, know him about 5yrs, he already knows xh & knows he's a raving nutter at present, has his own place (essential for persuing sexual relations away from dc's), my dc's love him already.

Ladies, I tell you I've had the best day ever, he has this habit of using his teeshirt to wipe away any paint splatters, the first time I saw him doing this I stood there grinning like a teenage girl (lovely toned stomach). I've just been romping around on my bed with the dc's while he's been laughing & singing painting my ceiling.

I think he's always had a bit of a crush on me but of course I was happily married & never looked at him in this light. I was thinking he'll probably be too nervous to come straight out and make a move so I'm thinking I'm going to drop a few hints about missing having someone to go out with etc..

Hello fellow independent and confident Dumplings - still no sign of an eager puppy type / gate shaver / flat stomached painter offering his sexual services. To be honest, I'm not sure if I could be arsed even if one turned up naked and balancing a box of Lindt truffles on his genitalia.

Beauty, I was so surprised to see you descibe yourself in such a negative way - I imagine you as a 5'8" Pre-Raphaelite type - all creative and funny, striding around in your knee high boots.

Startingover, the painter sounds well worth a few hints, he has a toned stomach and he's good with the dcs ? Geddin there.

The lecturer question as to whether it was knob or job first - I met Bollock Face when we were both 18 ( when I became the 'love of his life ' - ha ! ), he wasn't a knob then although in my committed and repeated attempts at the time to divest him of his keks, a certain amount of detail may have escaped me .

Hello fellow dumpets.

Sounds like a good day starting, I wish you well. Take one day at a time.
Your eager puppy will turn up Carmela.

My camp guy isn't moving, he's got a job where he can commute. We're discussing meeting for coffee tomorrow, the toad can look after ds in his shop for a while

Startingover drop huge great thumping smack him in his gorgeous face hints sounds perfect has he got an older brother? So is he being held hostage in your bedroom as we speak? any news?

I have decided I need to have a lazy night tonight but cunny loving gate shaver has been texting me, I was playing all Friday nights are girlie nights with him because I don't want appear too available if you know what I mean?! But quite touched that he's texting me I think you are right startingover I need to stop looking for the negative or will come out and bite my bum Actually I am having a girlie night but not out clubbing or anything I'm way too old for that malarkey!

Caramela yes lust re B*llock face I remember that stuff trouble is it makes you take all leave of your senses.

Beauty so glad you are seing womaniser tomorrow and I am sure you are simply fab and gorgeous or he would not be coming back for more tits out chin up girlie and strut your stuff in those fab patent boots

Fluffy have a fab time with the camp guy tomorrow

I seem to have reached saturation point on drinking wine solo and it has got to stop my bum is getting bigger and bigger so not a good look

I've cancelled my membership to the dating sites, there's way too many toads on there. My camp guy was on POF though. There's nothing going on with us so I can't moan really. He can't be too interested though right?

Hi everyone!

Need some advice from you all ..... I'm going on my Christmas night out with my work collegues, were going to Liverpool (very trendy) and I feel like a fat frump!! I've got black jeans, killer shoes and a black top with sparkles on it, best friend said its great but I'm not sure?? Is this going to be OK, everyone keeps telling me to wear leggings, WTF! I can't imagine going out in leggings ....?

I want to look fab, I want to attract looks from men .... so give me some tips on what to do, I have been off the 'scene' for 7 years and haven't a clue!! .I don't want to appear desperate (I am for a snog)!! But need some subtle ideas

BF is coming with me, there will be three other girls and five men, but I'm not after them men!! I just want to have a good flirt possibly a snog at the end!!

Sweetie, just be yourself. Don't dress up to attract looks from men, wear whatever you want. A real man will like you no matter what you are wearing, real men like smiles, not cleavage, tits are for little boys!

Evening Dumplings, "I'm not sure if I could be arsed even if one turned up naked and balancing a box of Lindt truffles on his genitalia." Ah Caramela, you never fail to give me a laugh. I was feeling exactly this way but couldn't have expressed it as eloquently.

I have to say however having a red blooded male in my house for the past two days has really thawed me out. I have to confess I have been day dreaming about things of a sexual nature most of the day & wondering would it be very sluttish of me to have had two eager puppy types to aid my recovery??

Fluffy, enjoy the coffee date. I already deleted my PoF profile tg.

Loobie, enjoy your girlie night.

X post MumtoWillow, I would deffinately go with what you're comfortable with i.e. the jeans, shoes & top. If you go with the leggings you'll probably feel very self conscious if you're not used to wearing them & end up wasting most of your time thinking "is my bum fat in these" instead of engaging in some flirting fun!!

You'll be fab in the jeans & I really hope you get that much desired snog!!

They need to rename it, plenty of slimes. Bleugh!

When's he back starting?

Hi Fluffy, back in the morning!!!!! A better name would be plenty of fuckers!!! Are you looking forward to your date tomorrow?

kind of. I can't really be bothered to be honest. I'm much happier lusting over Gerard Butler and Hugh Grant. I don't think I can be bothered, they are such a hassle.

aww Im rubbish at posting atm. But good luck to all daters today (and rest of weekend power to you Mutha) !And Starting painter sounds lovely -wish I had talent like that lined up.

And yes Caramela that gave me a good chuckle too and summed up how I feel too.

Dating reports please in ddue course( asap!)

Afternoon Dumplings, you must all be busy getting ready for your dates tonight etc..

Waves to Mumfun

Painter still whistling upstairs

He works on a saturday? this painter guy gets better and better I hope you are wafting around him looking suitably tempting startingover

Been shopping today and for once resisted any temptation to buy things for me and concentrated on presents for other people this is a huge step forward in my mindset because usually I buy shoes and handbags maybe I am cured hurrah

Nervous about tonight even though I know him now how silly is that?!

Hi Loobie, Nah, I went for the dressing gown look again this morning. He's just gone now. I'm becoming quiet attached, he was meant to be finished today but I've added in loads more so I'll have him for another day or two anyway.

That's lovely to be excited/nervous for tonight. I hope it goes well for you & that you get a repeat performance in the cunny dept. Enjoy & of course don't for get to report all back here for us creatures who have less exciting lives at the moment.

Beauty, hope you have a great night tonight with womaniser.

Waves to all the other dumplings.

Thanks startingover and Mumfun!

loobie, I'm nervous too! but have decided that I'm just going to go along and pretend he's just a friend. I have my outfit sorted & have just dyed eyelashes.

Want to ask him to come here and pick me up, but am scared he'll think it's a hassle or too forward. Argh. Bloody men, bloody dating!

Hello all

Just returned after a few days of fun with friends (female).

at reading so much talk of dates and hot painters.

Completely confused by my own feelings of "I can do this on my own - I will stay away from all men and dating sites" and "Where is my painter, life is so unfair?".

Wine, chocolates, DC's and XFactor all feel good tonight anyway so will be a night of drunken singing on the sofa.

Startingover good planning re the adding jobs in thing hope you have managed to slide a few hints in about going for a drink

Beautiful nerves are good I think wish I had thought to dye my eyelashes, go on ask him to collect you if he is worthy of you he will make the effort.

I will report back tomorrow afternoon on the progress he is staying over and we are going xmas shopping tomorrow very coupley thing to do but hey I get to shop and he might buy me a coffee

Hello all other dumplings ........ right off to dry and straighten the dreaded hair think I should opt for somthing short and less hassle but I just don't have the face for it