Beautiful's Road to Recovery for the Recently Ditched

[BEAUTlFUL]

Dearly Be-Chucked, we are gathered here today because, for whatever reason, our man has dumped us!

Whether we were dating, cohabiting or married, we are now to use therapist-speak well effed-off about the whole business and are desperate to regain our fabulosity.

Well, this is the place! This is where we regain our positivity, our self-confidence and eventually our mojos. We might think at the moment that we'd also like to regain our men, but that might not last long, as we'll soon realise that anyone who could put us through this does not deserve us.

Come in and start regaining your brilliance! I will be setting us exercises to complete that are based vaguely on self-help books, beauy tips and Feng Shui, or we'll just have a right good bitch until we feel completely drained and sick of the sound of our ex's names. Whatever works.

Hello dumplings!!

Just checking in briefly. I have a date at 8pm with a man from Match and just cannot be bothered. I hate it. I hate walking in pub by self, having to look around like a twat, then talk to random Match man without knowing if he's thinking, "Cor!" or "Ewww".

I hate the small-talk bollocks. I hate getting dressed-up for no reason. Hate waiting for them to call - or text as it is now - and have to go through the whole bloody business again.

I also hate that I have wasted today (my only child-free day all week) creating a stupid, pointless blog instead of proper work, and EATING NON STOP.

This is my last online date. I'm off men. Bloody wastes of time, the whole bloody lot.

(Of course, in a lovely fateful World, this would mean that tonight goes fabulously and it's all perfect, but in real life I bet it's just dull, pointless and boring.)

Date Report later! Bet you can't wait!

Hi Caramela, thanks for the words of wisdom, now hold on ..............slap......do not contemplate contacting the navel gazing fukwith that dumped you within a week of shagging you senseless if I remember correctly!!! If he had truly reformed & come to his senses he would be serenading you as we speak. You will only end up back in the same place again. It's probably just his cunny abilities you're really missing..... hold on, you'll find them again with someone who is not a fukwith. I love my xh too but he's still a fukwith & I'm better off here on my own loving him then hating the fuker & trying to live with him & his fu*kwitness.

I deleted my PoF profile last night as well, I'd prefer to stay single for the rest of my days then to be dealing with that bolloxology. I saw a thread about online dating on the lone parents thread here & I think they were recommending match & my best friend (or something like that), as being the best ones. I'll take my chances with the real world & the universe though.

Mavis, hope you day went well.

Beauty, your probably just about to enter the pub just now but I'm looking forward to an up-date on your return.

Need to dash, dc's killing each other. Bedtime yipee!!

Hi all.
Beauty - hope your date is going well. Much lol at swearing off men AGAIN - let's hope tonights date persuades you they aren't all knob jockeys.

Loobie - hope your date is going well too and that Mr Gate Shaver is suitably deep!

Startingover - I hope your dcs have some quieter nights, it's a killer but hopefully shortlived. I've got a really great circle of mum friends here so have lots of coffee and cake opportunities it's just they all go home to their families come the evenings/weekends and that's the hard bit. Forget men, I need to cultivate single friends!

Caramela - thanks for waving from the otherside of toddlerdom. And you really don't want to get in touch with bollockface. My X is also a navel gazer extrodinaire (that's actually what his job is. No really) and it's a PITA

Right, another night of MNing and tv. Ah well.

Hi Mavis, hope you have a quiet night too tonight. Glad to hear you have plenty of company by day. I feel the same when they go home to their families, that's why I'm usually buzzing by day & hit depression by night.

Just checking in to say hi and tell you all how bloody wonderful you are - cos you are you know.

It takes a strong person to pick themselves up and get on with things whilst raising dc - and that's exactly what we are doing. The fact that your dc's will grow up to be so fab will be more or less single handedly down to their wonderful mums x

And, just as I decided to also have a break from dating - guys come along like buses.

I may have a date friday with a football coach, saturday with a local nice guy and next wednesday with an army guy I had a few dates with after the summer. And a male nurse I had a date with at the beginning of October got back in touch today but I am pondering this guy - he was really nice, totally gorge and my type, but after are date said I was lovely but he had been on a date with a girl who lived closer.....and yet I just asked him if he was seeing someone and he said no.......

Remember - chin up and boobs out ladies - men or no men x

I'd be lost without you lot, never leave will you??

Date was a bit of a Yawnfest, as predicted. He was tasty! And i did gaze at his inner thighs as he walked in front of me to the bar but... no. He's an action man, ex-RAF type and I'm horribly unfit and just wank about on my PC all day and eat Dairylea. It would never work.

Made me really miss Womaniser! He has vanished now, but that first date was honestly the best first date I've ever had. He was so funny. Tonight's man = not funny.

Sigh. I think I might just buy 8 vibrators and literally wank myself to death.

Mutha! OMG, you're on fire!! Just go out with all of them. Are you OK for babysitters? If so, just go, go, go. Free meals, means you will have more money to spend on DC (guilt gifts, to say sorry for leaving them all weekend with random passers-by while you flit about with divorced cock!) Just go. Don't think/mull/ponder -- go.

JaynieB, thanks so much for your message! Exercise is indeed a fab idea. My new goal is to quit fags, quit Dairylea (it's really becoming a problem) and get all fit and healthy. Thanks!

Oh beautiful. Hold on for someone worthy of your wit!

Toad's girlfriend called him 'hun' on his FB page and has been replying to his friends that she's never met. Boy can he really screw up, she's a bit of a nutter. Who on earth sticks 1000 of photo's on their page? Aint my problem though, karma and all that.

Caramela, my advice is the opposite of
(wise) Mavis's -- for some reason, I was thinking about you and BollockFace in the shower today. (Don't be frightened - I wasn't soaping my baps and moaning noisily.) Why not go out with him if he asks you? Just one drink? See what he says? Could it really hurt? Could it?

Has he tried to get you back at all, or is it still just the self-justifying texts, etc?

Thanks Fluffster!

Er - do you think it might be time to hide WankFace's updates from your FB page? If I could see my ex's FB updates (or lovely Womaniser's, for that matter), I'd be going nuts, churning it all round in my brain all day. Ignorance really is bliss, you know.

(((Fluff)))

It's already been done. Sod that I thought, I'll leave him to his nutter, they are well matched considering his head games. Now, I just need to meet Gerard Butler.

Right, am off to remove Beautiful date-face and go back to wrinkly, haggard face of 40-a-day single mother, put on PJs and spend quality time with the one man who'll never let me down: Bill from TrueBlood.

See you all tomorrow. In style of sergeant major: Chins UP, Tits OUT!

Well done, Fluffy. Sleep well, dream of Gerard!

He'll do until I find a real one hey. Night beautiful. I hope you have a truly lovely day tomorrow.

Morning, God I am so tired trying hard with the tits out chin up style of walking but my face is letting me down I look like I need to sleep for a week. Teenage son has got the hump with me for having the audacity to go out for 3 whole hours last night and leave him in charge of the kitten.... you know the kitten he begged and pleaded for months to get!! He's not really talking to me today either and it made me realise that despite the fact that he is my son he is A MAN

Date went well I am still waiting for somebody to come along and pull the rug from under me there has got to be a catch just not found it yet.

Beatiful I too got to the I really cannot be ars*d stage with internet dating, the whole wasting a couple of hours of your life getting to know somebody that you may or may not ever see again, it's tiring and mind numbing, but if you do find a half decent one it kinda makes it worth it even though blokes are not worthy of us with our fab glamour and wit. Plus how do you know anyone is half decent they should all come with pedigree papers like my kitten and a brief overview from previous partners so we know what we are letting ourselves in for.

Startingover and Mavis I hope you managed a better nights sleep last night

Mutha a football coach you lucky lucky cow

Fluffy you simply cannot have Gerard Butler he's mine LOL

Right better do some work before they rumble me have a fab day Dumplings

Oh by the way Caramela well done for avoiding the Vodka and NO NO NO you must not B*llock face, the cold sores are dreadful and the cunny loving gate shaver is still performing well even though my DIL beat him to the gate shaving antics lol

Just shortest visit. Will catch up more fully later.

But just to say I was doing ok with enforced celibacy - but am not now and blame you all. What with talk of gate shaving, hot funny dates and doing the deed, I am not all right now and even sadly considering phoning one of those dating sites for married people. (but of course not wanting to damage someone else marriage beecause dont think you could ever belive any of men on it)Also considering asking estranged H - now that is desperate.

See what youve driven me to. I would definitely do puppy if available. Back later

Mumfun apologies try to blot all the sex talk out & definitely do not go via illicit encounters been there done that and you end up feeling worse not that I ever did the actual deed of course

do puppy?

Morning Dumplings, so glad to see you're all doing well. Had dc's up again last night, so am wrecked yet again. It's good for keeping me in focus though, I don't have the energy to even think about men or shagging.

Mumfun, beware that happened to me last wk when I was reading all the posts of dates etc.. & I ended up with strange penis texter! Feel so much better since I've dropped all that shite. I'll ship you over puppy on condition that you'll return him if I become desperate for a bit of physical relief.

I don't have much in the whole tits dept to be shoving out but I'm doing my best with my gel filled push up!

Loobie, I've a good feeling about your cunny gate shaver, just enjoy & don't be looking for the pitfalls. You've probably been too busy with cunny man to have read your book but it will tell you that by worrying about these things we'll draw them to us, so banish those thoughts.

Fluffy, tits out, onwards & upwards.

Beauty, sorry to hear your date didn't manage to rid your head of womaniser. Invest in a rabbit (the battery type), satisfaction guaranteed everytime & no rejection to contend with.

Mutha, aren't you the dark horse...... how did you manage all that, have you hidden yourself away with the secret & been visualising men in abundance!!!!!!!!!!

Forgot to say my painter is moving operation house along as we speak...yipee.

Tiredness has deffinately cured me of all things male related........I have a single man of the right age upstairs whistling in my bedroom & I haven't even engaged in any thoughts of sex deeds!

Womaniser texted me and has remembered we had date arranged ages ago for this Sat! 'm back on men again!

Hurrah for Beautiful
Startingover I simply cannot believe you have a man in your bedroom and you are not even the slightest bit filthy minded you must be so tired review the situation immediately, single, right age you go girl!!

Hurrah for Beautiful
Startingover I simply cannot believe you have a man in your bedroom and you are not even the slightest bit filthy minded you must be so tired review the situation immediately, single, right age you go girl!!