Being a "high end" sex worker and what it means/involves

[OFFS]

I have another thread going, in which dittany has suggested that I am a male fantasist, and therefore a liar. She says this because I have said that I am a prostitute, and generally enjoy my work, though it is not without problems. I have started this thread so that those of you who have questions about "high end" (SBG's phrase, not mine) prostitutes can ask me, directly, any questions you might have.

Please note that I am not a street-worker, I do not work in a brothel, and I have no pimp. My clients approach me via email - I do not hang out in hotel bars, and I require at least 24 hours notice of an appointment. I have no knowledge or personal experience of these other aspects of sex work.

I choose which clients I see, and can walk out at any time. I am not trafficked or abused, and have never had a violent client in eight years. I pay my taxes like any other self-employed businesswoman. I do not have any addiction to any illegal drugs, and I always use condoms with my clients. I have regular check-ups at my local GUM. While I have no direct knowledge of parlour/sauna/brothel work, I do have trusted prostitute friends with that experience, and I will do my best to furnish the information you require.

Please also note that I am not qualified or experienced enough to discuss women who are trafficked, abused, drug-addicted or so forth. I can, and am willing, to discuss my own life - I am not responsible for others.

'SSD and fairlady: you think sex is work is shameful. Thta's your issue. Projecting it onto other people just makes you look close-minded. '

I do not think that they are projecting it onto other people. OP is clearly ashamed because if not she would do what everyone else does and talk about to everyone. Her DC would be at school telling everyone her mother's job is she wasn't ashamed. I think OP said that she didn't have a DD, but if she did she would be telling her what a wonderful top earner it was and DD could set herself up for life if she started young. She wouldn't want her DD to do it because she is ashamed.
To my mind she does it because she doesn't have the qualifications for a well paid job and so puts the spin on it that it is glamorous and fun to hide the fact it is seedy and sordid.
I assume, since you think it isn't shameful solidgoldbullet, that you would be perfectly happy for your DD to submit to the demands of any man who will pay her enough?

If any child of mine was considering taking up sex work, if s/he was really set on it I would make sure that s/he understood the best and safest ways to do it (ie how to find a good agency or work safely as an independent, Don't work the streets or in the flats, don't accept less than £150 an hour ever).

If any child of mine was going to do it I would be following her around, getting the names of the men and telling their wives!!

solid - True, the city boys are more than proud of their lap dancing visits. I used to work in a place where the men went at lunchtime because you could get a dance and a pint for a tenner. It actually was annoying and a bit creepy because they'd come back into the office all horny, bolshy and randy and it just wasn't appropriate in that environment. You could hardly breathe for the testosterone in the air, a lot of women in the office complained about it and it was stopped.

They all thought they were Gods gift because they could afford to pay a girl to grind on them for 5 minutes.

sgb, so it is ok for a child of yours to sell their body for £150/hour, but no way for £149/hour

that is truly horrible

I would hope to god that if a daughter of mine were savvy enough to become high end in the industry and negotiate that kind of money, she would also be bright enough to do something for a living that engages her brain and not her bits.

SGB i really hope you would be prepared to cope with the aftermath of 'allowing' someone to get into prostitution. I have never been able to forgive my 'friend' who got my into the industry, i couldnt imagine if it was my own mother

Your mother is supposed to be the one who saves you from this kind of thing, i hope you don't think i am having ago, i usually agree with your posts on other subjects but maybe the reality of being a hooker is different to what alot of people thinik?

And anyway, the location of where you do it (obviously i dont mean on the streets) flats/parlours/penthouse apartments/5* hotels/hourly rate hostels doesnt matter, when you do it you close your eyes anyway, you could be anywhere, the only place that you would rather be at the time is out of the body that is having some stranger heaving away on top of you.

I really hope you wouldnt encourage your DC in real life, and that you saying you would is just for show on here because you dont want to be wrong.

Please protect your children, rather than sending them out to let people abuse their bodies, yes, they might enjoy it, but would you risk it if they dont and they get trapped in such an unforgiving industry?
If my parents hadnt saved me i could be dead right now, killed by a punter, drug overdose, anything, you would never forgive yourself. x

Solidgoldbrass - fucking hell!

I'm glad things worked out for you CYSWINC. I am very unliberal because I would do everything possible to stop her.

I am having a little wonder here is sgb ever reads anything back that she has written and thinks "what the fuck was I thinking"??

if

At the risk of labouring the point, I still would like the OP to give a credible answer about why she doesn't tell her children (whom I note she referred to either here or on the other thread as "adults") what she does. After all, if they are grown up, they should be able to understand the difference between what you tell your friends and what you keep within the family.

This has nothing to do with not discussing your sex life with your kids - it's about not discussing your job with your kids. Unless you can cite the Official Secrets Act (or similar) what other reason can there be for totally concealing how you make your living?

MsHighwater...be careful what you are asking, by asking the above..apparently you are making yourself look smallminded, because you are projecting your own view of shame onto the OP...
well, so Solidgold says...

I totally agree with you, btw...having asked the same but not received an answer, I truely would be interested in teh answer....

I am also still astounded how anyone can justify prostitution when apparently being christian (not OP, but the hubbyguy and wife)...now I hvae not had a close relationship with religion for a while, but if my hazy memory serves me correct, than I believe sex outside marriage is not acceptable. So, I can just not understand how a church-going christian can justify prostitution, etc...

FairLady, I think I can live with solidgold thinking of me as small-minded.

I would like to think the OP might have been moved to think more deeply about what her reluctance to share something so important with her nearest and dearest (her dh apart) means about what her work really does to her.

indeed

oh, this thread had me thinking about something last night, as I couldn't get to sleep....about a namechange....am rather tempted to call myself HairyArsedTrucker....lol...as I thought about it last night it made me giggle...

If anyone I knew was considering sex work I would want them to be as fully informed as possible about the risks and how to protect themselves from risk, whether they had a misguidedly romantic view of it, or were utterly desperate for money and thought this was the only way to earn some. If it was the latter I would do my best to help them find alternative ways of getting money because doing sex work out of desperation means you take too many risks and do yourself more harm.
There is nothing inherently wrong with engaging in sex for money, any more than it's wrong to engage in sex for security or career advancement or out of politeness. But if you are going to do it, you need to know how to keep yourself safe and not get exploited by pimps or abused by customers.
I don't think a 'Just Say No' approach is valid advice to anyone on anything BTW, always give people as much information as possible to make their own decisions.

This is a very interesting and thought-provoking thread.

How would you feel, though, if your daughter chose this as a way to earn her living?

If my (hypothetical - I have a DS) DD chose to do this ie working as an escort with a good agent or an independent I would make sure she was armed with as much information as possible, and also that she knew I loved her, wouldn't condemn her, and would be there for her. If the hypothetical DD felt she had no other option or was being coerced into it I would help her get to a place where she could make other choices.

would he get £150 ph? that is a deal breaker apparently

Just think of all the hot guys he could service, though.

I mean, all guys who pay for sex with high end hookers are great-looking and rich, right?

and he'd be able to chat about his day at work with his mum over his tea....