FAB & GLAM PART 9 - DOES IT GET BETTER NOW!!

[macdoodle]

Started new thread guys as needed to post and old one wouldnt let me - sorry if name is bit miserable but thats how am feeling !

The police have just left
It all went tits up tonight - H found out/suspected about NM and lost it completely - was physically abusive and took my phone - best friend called the police!
Has been a hell of a night - long statement - excellent police man - who says should have called them a long time ago - gonna get the domestic violence team to ring me tomorrow - he will be arrested and probably cautioned - he seems really worried it will escalate - has put a marker on the phone for an immediate response, has adviced me to change the locks and go away for a bit if I can, and they will look at putting an alarm in the house
There is still a part of me that feels I am over reacting/is all my fault - even though an experienced police oficer is not happy about the situation!
What a mess my life has turned into

McD - have you ever heard anything about waiting a few cycles before ttc after a missed miscarriage? Never heard that before, but just saw something on a website. Too late for me, just wondered.

McD , TFM

LL how you feeling bout tom ?

Nervous but resigned to it. Expecting the worst so that I can mentally prepare myself iyswim. So frustrated that no one seems to know why I keep having mcs. Still, have had very healthy diet past 5 weeks and no alcohol, so if we have to try again my body will be better prepared.

LL i have no experience in this but can imagine it's very hard and even harder to let yourself think it's going to be ok!
I hope tom surprises you i really do , i have everything crossed xxx

Gosh Lily, just saw your post, quote "i have no experience in this but can imagine it's very hard and even harder" and thought you had posted on the wrong thread!! MacD is leading you astray!!

LL, please don't expect the worst, I know it's difficult (TFM avoids the word 'hard') but, try to enjoy the fact that you are actually pregnant, go with it It's a 50% chance it's good news just as it's a 50% chance it's bad new so why choose the negative view? Please don't think me harsh, I want everything to work out for you almost as much as you do

Awh, I'm glad my post at 20.09 cheered you up LL

cos the negative view helps me to prepare.
Thanks all for the support. Will feedback tomorrow.

Hope the weekend isn't too hard for you

I know sweetie, I really do. I do so hope it is good news for you and will be keeping a look out for your post. xx

LL all fingers crossed let us know

Hi all. Good news
6 week,3 day pregnancy. Hb present. First hurdle over. Going back in 2 weeks for reassurance scan. The sonographer was lovely. Such a change from the previous one.

oh LL am so pleased still have verything crossed for you

Thank you Macdoodle

That's brilliant news LL!! I am sooo happy for you! Enjoy the rest of your weekend now!

Hi Everyone,
Can I join? I have finally split from a miserable relationship from my DD's father and I LOVE the fact that this might be my "Happy Year".

LL - such lovely news that I couldn't not post! So pleased to hear the littlie is holding on.

xx

Thank you Dior and TFM
Welcome MadamOvary

By the way MadamOvary, am going to Edinburgh for the first time next weekend. Any must sees?

Sneaked a look at your profile Btw, your dd is gorgeous

Welcome Madam Ovary

I have taken a peek at your profile too and second what our LL says about your DD! She is gorgeous! And those beautiful eye's! Bless her.

Well done on getting out of your miserable relationship. Here's to a happy future

Hope you are having a good day LL xx

Ahhh at "our LL"
Dior - glad you came out of hiding for a little while. Looks like MadamOvary is a fellow crafter

teabags help .....
STBXH has now gone on charm and manipulation offense ++++++ - phone callls and texts a lot - he is sorry, I am killing him, he cant live without me, has nothing to live for, he can change, he will change, stop seeing NM, stop divorce etc etc etc
Am struggling Have told him that divorce and NM are seperate issues, have no intention of stopping either, he has had enough chances, he cant change, he is destroying me, leave me alone, have now stopped answering or responding at all but need phones on for now as DD1 is out and waiting for her to get back !!
I need to be harder, to be stronger, I need to not care, to not feel sad - I dont know if I can do this, I dont want to go back, I know he is desperate, this is so hard help me be strong please

MacD, just remember the other night. How scared you were, how out of control he was. Having to call the police, giving statements.

He hasn't changed over the past few days. I'm sure TFM predicted on here this would be his next move.

Do not listen. Please for your own sanity. You have come so far. Stay strong. You can do this for you and your DDs sake.

MACDOODLE!!!! STEP AWAY FROM THE PHONES!! DO NOT RESPOND TO HIM!!

Log every single call, text, anything that he does or says. This will help you as it is harassment and is all part or his abuse. He is not sorry, he is feeling lost, he knows he is losing control and he is panicking. He will try every trick in the book to win you round, make you like' him again. Trust me, this isn't about you, this isn't him feeling sorry for you, he is feeling sorry for himself. He feels weak and powerless without his victim to bully and abuse. As soon as you respond to him he will feel a huge relief, he will feel you coming back to him and think the door is open to continue. When he is sure he has you back he will start all over again. Trust me Mac, you need to break this cycle of abuse for the good of you and your children. The only way to break it is by having no contact with him.

Please MacD, be strong.

Snoringnightmare is right MacD, I did predict this would happen here:

TimeForMe on Fri 23-Jan-09 09:39:45

To be honest, I would ring the police and tell them what he is doing, they will log it and it will help you. They will also contact him and tell him to leave you alone. Don't feel bad for doing it, don't doubt yourself or that it would be the right thing to do. It is absolutely the right thing to do. Please don't wait until he has hurt you again before you act, do it now!!