Boyfriend can’t accept my past

[2026dreams]

My partner wants to know about my sexual past and everyone I have slept with, is this normal ? He wants to know details of people I slept with 27 years ago

If he wants a sexually inexperienced woman you are not for him, you are clearly incompatible (and he's nuts) so finishing it was the only thing to do. Wish him luck finding someone that would put up with that level of scrutiny. Onwards and upwards.

Sadly you are very very wrong. This recent analysis shows that it’s the opposite of a ‘rarity’ and in fact the majority of deaths were where no prior indication of abuse was known to the police (57%) - but the 43% already known to be abusers is where the police / society have failed these women with devastating and irreversible consequences for the women, their children and their families.

www.gov.uk/government/publications/key-findings-from-analysis-of-domestic-homicide-reviews/quantitative-analysis-of-domestic-homicide-reviews-october-2022-to-september-2023-accessible

Sounds like a lucky escape OP, he sounds absolutely nuts. I'd strongly recommend not seeing him again. With regards his stuff, just dump it by his front door. Block him on everything.

I love the JADE post, I really need to remember it.

Honestly it was exhausting and demeaning trying to think of people I have slept with over 25 years ago
I have been sleeping so much better

So Freeing, I bet.

The anxiety I ve had recently has gone

Please do this www.freedomprogramme.co.uk to help with boundaries going forward.

That’s good news. Have you got new plans to fill your weekend if you usually spend then with him? Have you managed to speak to someone IRL that the relationship has ended?

Thank yes I have plenty of support in real life, I wasn’t due to see him but have no plans this weekend which will be absolutely wonderful
I have a million things that I need to get on with to sort myself out. I am going to treat myself to a lovely lunch out though
as long as those tasks get done😊

I think I feel absolute relief, there is no way I could go back I have told far to many people know who all appear equally horrified with his behaviour

That’s brilliant. I am so pleased for you. It must be such a weight lifted. Keep taking, keep safe and have fun. You haven’t heard the last of him tho - so have a plan for that.

I am so pleased for you. A brighter and more peaceful chapter lies ahead x

Delighted for you. Your relief speaks volumes, remember that.👏

I ve placed all his stuff in the garage so he can get it himself and not bother me
I am going to change the locks as well and block him on everything and ask my friends to do the same

Delighted to see your update, enjoy your weekend and being yourself again 🙌🏻

Excellent plan. All the best for your future.

All fantastic news - and well done you.

Putting his stuff in the garage is great. All good strategies.

Onwards and upwards.

That's how its done.
Good on you.

The thing is I was walking along the other day feeling a bit gloomy and then I thought of all these mumsnetters around the country cheering me on ! And thought fuck it time to take some control back
I don’t feel sad or anxious just quite peaceful and relaxed.
so thank you to everyone who took the time to post and offer support and advice! It really did help
onwards and upwards for me

Im so pleased for you. You deserve so much better.

Well done OP. You have made the right choice amd glad you're feeling better for it.

We are literally all cheering you on!!!!

Hi @2026dreams

I haven't posted on your thread as I didn't feel I had anything useful to add to the advice given by other posters, and in any case it seemed clear to me that you had the measure of the situation and were absolutely making the right decisions. But when I read this I thought I must chip in and tell you this lurker has also been cheering you on!

Onwards and very much upwards OP. Great to see a woman with a strong sense of her own worth.

What a lovely post ! It put a smile on my face this morning and I have woken up feeling free ! Well as free as one can be on a Monday morning at work

I’m trying to think what Barry Body Count might used as his online dating profile?
’Barry here. Aged 50, straight, apparently fully functioning adult. Previous long marriage and relationship just ended as the person would not provide for me, in writing, the number of people she’s slept with.
So what I am looking for is a younger (35/40?) woman who is a sex object, satisfies me in bed, but is an actual virgin. However, I am a man and therefore don’t want a prude.
Before our date I would be grateful if you could fill out the attached questionnaire about your sexual past. And please don’t lie about your ‘body count’ as I shall interrogate you about it until you are close to breakdown.
Anyway, I am sure that’s enough to reflect the wonderful, high value male I am. I look forward to hearing from the masses of women who fit into this category and clearly see what a catch I am.’

More likely it'll be:
No1 reads this. Will fill in l8r.