Would you date someone who does not drive

[Dancemom1]

Would it put you off from dating someone if you found out they didn’t drive?
after a nice first date with a man (40)
i found out he didn’t drive.
i do drive myself and couldn’t be without my car as i have w busy life with kids.
he has no kids so its a bit different.
he also lives around a 20 min drive away.

It’s caused a huge amount of resentment to be honest. He now says we can’t afford to run two cars so there’s no point. He completely misses the point. The point that we could share the driving. I have chronic health issues now and drive myself to and from all my hospital appointments (60 mile round trip, we live fairly rurally) and I am sick of it. It’s worth another thread to be honest. He has no motivation to learn for himself as he works 5 mins walk down the road. It suits him. It’s very selfish.

It was my late mum's expression for anyone who thought they were better than 'the masses' and it just slipped out!

😆 It just sounded funny.

I actually remember reading the Little Lord Fauntleroy book in English at school in the early 1980s.

Yes, my mum was a fan of the book back in her youth! Hence the expression. Do you know, I don't think I've ever read it?

Anyway. Back to your scheduled programme...

Sounds like you might be a bit younger than me...

I'm in my sixties...

LLF was just never my thing, but my mum loved it!

The whole car dependence thing irritates me so I would be put off by someone who couldn’t contemplate someone who uses public transport / cycles / walks etc

(I do have a car and drive but also use public transport a lot and my Dc were independently using public transport as soon as they hit secondary age. City life)

Obviously cars are essential for some people, for some purposes and some journeys but the MN obsession with driving, parking, having your own drive is anti-planet and non progressive, and a symptom, in many cases, of TSM (Tedious Suburban Matron)

Ah ha, maybe a little bit older then. 😘

Thought you meant Lord Farquart from Sherk for a minute there
Also apt for a little weedy man lol !

Apparently, that’s what my DH used to be called by my BIL when they were both growing up. Because my DH was the goody goody child. 🤣

It would depend on why, where he lived (town or city for example vs rural) and how willing he was to sort himself out on public transport. If you live rurally and a 20 min drive away I think the effort of constantly being the one to drive would quickly wear thin. Having said that a good friend is in that position (long term real but living apart) and he will get the bus to her or she will drive to him and she likes it that way (I think it works for her for him not to be there too often!).

I’d much rather someone didn’t drive than they drive but were a really atrocious driver.

The key for me would be their ability to get themselves around. One of my DDs isn’t allowed to drive for medical reasons. She gets herself around perfectly fine (despite the fact we live rural and she has to be organised.

One of the guys in her support group for her condition basically expects people to fetch and carry him and his attitude would be massively offputting.

It’s not clear what you mean by ‘does not drive’. Doesn’t have a license? Has a license but no car? Has a licence but doesn’t want to drive?

When I met DP he had a licence but no car. It’s was a total non issue as we live in a major city and neither of us need a car for work etc. It’s a total waste of money to have it sat there just for rare occasions.