Husband blocked me after he dumped me. What to do from here

[Annabel20]

Any advice would be greatly appreciated. My husband left me out of the blue (we have 2 DD’s). He says he still loves me but he wants to forget me and move on. He has also said he wants to start dating but he doesn’t have anyone yet although he’s open to finding someone and remarrying and having more children. He then blocked me on WhatsApp so I can’t even call him about the children. I’m heartbroken I can’t stop crying. How can he say he loves me then block me and say he wants to move on. Surely if he loved me he wouldn’t be looking to be with anyone else? Also how can he block me when we have children. Please advise I’m on the verge of a nervous breakdown. How can he be so cruel. How do men do this I don’t understand how can he think he can just dump his family like we’re nothing and go start again. I’m a young mum by the way and I have no support at all 😭

This this this. What a nasty piece of work he is. Focus on the practical steps now, lock the emotions away as best you can. This swine will fleece you if you delay.

I couldn’t read and run, he is an utter fool. I’m so sorry. It may be that at some point you turn this inwards and blame yourself but don’t, this is all him. No decent human being ups and leaves his wife and kids and takes all the money with them. You must tell your family, your friends and get support around you. Lawyer up and I hope something can be sorted re the money. I am just appalled at his behaviour and offer a handhold. You deserve much better as do your kids.

I’d be buying a baseball bat and a shovel myself. Good grief what a heel this guy is.

OP, if you get on well with his sister I'd be tempted to go back to her and say y'know what SIL, I don't expect you to be a go between, but you are DDs auntie and you will always be DDs auntie and I would love for you to still have that relationship (if they have a good one!) so can we talk about how we can keep that going? The girls will need their family around them, as many decent family members as exist, through this

Its funny how he feels your father is responsible for you and his kids, but he can walk away from his responsibility easily enough.
He's a complete shit obviously, he has broken your heart, the kids heart without any explanation, he doesn't want to pay and he has millions? He's stole family money and refusing to talk to you?
Gently, I'm asking is this his normal behaviour and now it's too serious to ignore? You where not on any house deeds, joint accounts you do sound easily erasable, you know you where too trusting, but why has it taken him leaving for you to see how little effect you had in your own life? You can't tell his parents incase they get ill? That's his worry not yours, you telling them their son has abandoned and stole from his family is his shame. No one seems to care about you, sister In Law not calling back, you seem already so distant from your supposed family. That's hard, I'm sorry your in this position. Don't let your kids go down the same path, if his family want you or kids in life, they have to talk openly about what happening to you and support you. Fight for every penny to can claim from your marriage, he's told you he doesn't want to look after his kids, so you have too, by making their father pay for them.
He sounds so dodgy to be honest, it wouldn't be long before something comes up which would make it hard to be with him

Thank you. Oh no not feeling suicidal at all my kids are everything to me and I would never leave them. Just in shock and incredibly hurt but today it’s become anger. I’ve always been very strong mentally and that’s what my ex hated. I’m just an honest person so to think I trusted someone like this is incomprehensible to me.

He has financial responsibilities towards his children which he cannot choose to ignore.

Your wealthy father is irrelevant

The UK prohibited UK companies from issuing bearer shares in 2015 and required existing UK bearer shares to be converted or cancelled.

If property was owned by an overseas company, then (since 2022), it has to be on the register of overseas entities. An overseas entity selling relevant UK property will generally need its overseas entity ID for the Land Registry process.

Stop talking to his family they have already shown they ar enot on your side. Get a lawyer fast, they will tell you what you can do. Find one specialising in high net worth individuals. Borrow the money for their fees off your dad. They will be expensive but worth it. They are used to rich bastards trying to hide their money and wise to their tricks. Firms like Vardags/ Irwin Mitchell/Weightmans.

Do not tell his family anything. Put in a CMS claim immediately while he's still in UK. Stop worrying about if he's cheated sexually he's cheated you and YOUR CHILDREN financially. He is an utterly shit husband and dad. Take control

OP, what was the reason for the house sale?

Have you ever signed anything related to businesses or property while with your (soon to be ex) husband?

I know it won’t feel great now but you are well rid. He’s so appalling on every level it’s unreal.
Stolen your money.
Left.
Blocked you.
And his kids.
No way is he depressed the lying scum bag.
I know he has responsibilities but from the sounds of it he will be off with your money - partly his, but he has stolen from you and his own children.
I would want his parents to know. I wouldn’t give a toss about their health he doesn’t give a toss about your parents.
The only lesson for you here is to never get financially involved again. When you are ready one day of course you can meet someone else.
While it’s not your dad’s job I do hope he can help out. Make sure you get everything sorted because things like inheritance matter.
Do not let this man take any more.
He has no idea what he’s lost.
He is also about to go and live in the most soulless place on earth. I know because I have experience I hated it.

He's moving fast, you need to move faster. Tell your father, get legal advice fast... I know it's hard but sort this now & cry later. And be glad you're rid of the bastard. Awful, awful man.

You have his family and presumably work contact details so I'd have thought he could be traced. I hope his family will be supporting you - what kind of man abandons his family financially when he has millions in the bank? Your solicitor will advise but it sounds like he has committed a crime by removing your access to the shared proceeds of your house sale. I would involve the police asap.

I agree with this. Don’t be fobbed off with tales of high blood pressure, etc. he obviously didn’t care enough about his parents to not put them through any stress.

dont believe his sister. She won’t have your back. He will spin a load of shit about you to his parents. You need them to hear the truth from you. Ideally today. Do they see their grandchildren often?

I’d be calling police, what he’s done is theft!

Focus all your emotion and anger on protecting yourself and the children. You need a shit hot lawyer immediately, hopefully your DF can fund this, tell them everything and get them to explain your options for freezing his (your shared) assets. In preparation for a first meeting, write everything down about the house purchase and sale, the company structures, the offshore accounts, dates for all of the above, and what your contributions were to everything. Search for any and all detail you can add around full names and numbers of the companies, where they are registered, etc. All of this will help the lawyer and save precious time. It sounds he like has been plotting this for a while.

Oh, and he sounds like a total and utter shitbag. I am rooting for you.

Great. It’s in the millions. That means it is absolutely worth employing shit hot lawyers and forensic accountants. Get angry and don’t lose your anger.

I think PP meant that your ex could be suicidal

Then get to a solicitor today to freeze his accounts

Hi OP. This is horrible and I am so sorry that he is behaving like this. It is possible that your husband is both depressed and seeing someone else. His behaviour is very hurtful and many of us will have gone through something similar when this man you have loved and cherished just changes to reveal himself as a complete pig. There are two things you need to be focused on. Firstly yourself and your girls. For you get access to therapy and seek as much support from your family as you can. This level of shock is great and the suddenness of it can really impact you and the children as well.

Secondly you need to prepare for divorce. As others have said, start gathering as much information as possible. If you go online google Form E. This is the form solicitors use in divorce and asks for disclosure on a number of areas. It is a good basis to start on what information you need. It includes pensions, savings, shareholdings etc. You need to make sure that you are getting absolutely everything you are entitled to.

He does not want to support you or his family. He can fuck off with that notion. Ask your dad for a loan and support to get the best solicitor you can. Ask around for personal recommendations and then deal with this only via your legal advisor suggests.

At some point he may try and come back. This usually happens when any new woman also realises he is a shit, and she will be dealing with a ready made family. Or when he realises that his finances will be severely impacted by divorce. Be resolute. He has shown himself to be a shit and trust me he will not change. Take him back once and he will use the breathing space to shag someone else in due course.

There will be brightness on the horizon. There are much better men out there and you will find one. Dutch this little shit ASAP.

Makes you wonder if he has planned this from the beginning when he met you. He probably knew about your wealthy family.

First things first. Get your friends/family around you and also go see a lawyer. This is going to be a long road and it will evolve a lot from where it is now. Keep things simple, don't think about the future, and keep talking to those around you. Don't look at the "big picture" as you will feel overwhelmed. Just look at the next step.

You poor poor thing but remember he sounds like he has planned this for months so MOVE FAST.
-Solicitor today (ask your dad for help with money)... Take their advice if report to police. Get his accounts frozen
-CMS application today
-Uc application in the next 48 hours
-start divorce proceedings
-Get the solicitor to do what they do to stop him taking your kids to Dubai... You may enrage him by standing up to him and try to steal the kids. He is a psychopath
-STOP going through SIL to parents. Speak to them directly as grandparents. All this wishy washy "they want him to stay" will not clothe or feed their grandchildren. Can they help support if he won't? Dont give a toss about their blood pressure.
-take anything you can from joint accounts immediately

Find your anger and protect your babies. Good luck xx

You could spend ages wondering why he left. He sounds awful. Concentrate on practical things. CMS, solicitor-why should he waltz off with all the house sale money. Find out what you can do to stop him running away from his financial responsibilities.

sending you love and strength! I’m sorry this happened and what an absolute asshole, leaving you in such way but just abandoning his children is disgusting. You will come out the other side, it won’t be easy but you will! x