I think instead of basing your decision on emotion (You wanted this, you pay for it!!!) you need to base it on what is best for you. Is it really best for you to have your finances and your life legally tied to his? Is there some emotional 'tie' that you don't want to break due to the 'finality' of doing so? To keep allowing him time to hide or spend money that should form part of a marital settlement if he decides to? To have no leverage or legal order that forces him to do the right thing? To keep living in a financial (and emotional) limbo? To have your home 'hanging fire'? If you feel that refusing to file for divorce is 'punishing' or hurting him in any way, I can assure you it is not. In his mind and in his heart, he is a single man. Divorce is just a 'technicality' to him. And if he expects to have to give up even a tiny part of his pension or other assets he has every reason NOT to file. And remember, as long as your home is jointly owned or rented, he has the right of entry.
Again, he has no real reason to file for divorce, has he? He is in control of his life and his finances with nothing in place to say he has to pay for anything. He avoids the chance that a court order won't be 50/50 thus having to pay maintenance, he's not required pay on the mortgage/rent or any remaining joint expenses. Nor is he required to hand over any part of his assets. He's really in the catbird seat, isn't he? And honestly, do you really feel it's causing him one moment of anguish that he's still married to you? I can assure you, it doesn't. Whereas it seems that you are feeling considerable anguish at still being married to him. You need to take emotion and pain and notions of 'revenge' out of this decision.
I'd suggest at this point you see your solicitor and get down to real brass tacks about what a total and final financial split would look like for you. And what his pattern of having the DC means as far as 50/50. And (forgive my bluntness), stop thinking with your heart and start thinking with your head. It's a good head and seems to be firmly attached to your shoulders. Get educated and make a rational, unemotional decision. Then, if that decision is that waiting for him to file is best for you, so be it.
FWIW, I decided on a legal separation vs a divorce. At my 'advanced age' and considering survivor's benefits (US) it was a better decision for me financially than divorce. But if I were a younger woman, especially if I had minor DC, I would have divorced DH. At first I was content to just keep the status quo, after all we'd been married 38 years, but after seeing a solicitor and understanding my financial liabilities I had to act. Debt in a marriage is different in the US, I would have been liable for any debt he incurred and any assets I had, even 'sole assets' would have been subject to seizure to pay a debt he incurred. And he was driving drunk and squandering money. 'Getting legal' was the right thing to do even though it hurt my heart because it legally divided all marital assets and legally removed any liability for debts he incurs. I will love the man until I die, but I hate the alcoholic. So I had to take emotion out of the equation and do what was right for me. Was it painful? Yes, it felt like a betrayal. But it was right for me.
As far as your rings, you wear them until you truly don't want to. I still wear mine and probably always will, but then we are still married although I'll never live with him again. If the day comes that I want to take them off, I will. But I had a cousin who divorced due to her exH cheating & leaving for an OW and she wore hers for probably 5 years after the divorce. She wasn't emotionally attached to him, but I guess she was to her rings. She took them off when she felt it was the right time for her to do so.