I met a guy a few months ago who came to do some building work next door. We hit it off when we met and would find ourselves chatting a lot. it was flirty but it didn’t cross any boundaries and he was never inappropriate, as he was at work.
I found him very attractive but wasn’t clear on what signals I was getting so I didn’t pursue anything or put myself out there. when the job came to an end, we had a very awkward goodbye. He found a reason to return to remedy tiny little bits of work and pop by, and at that point, I felt more confident he might be interested so I put myself out there and said I was going to miss his company.
From there we nervously got chatting by text and he confessed after a few days of nice brief chats he thought I was beautiful, and lovely to be around, and he liked me.
We decided to meet up again on neutral ground, I was so nervous, and turns out so was he. The nervous chemistry between us was intense. We had a very awkward first kiss because he is so tall, all the proportions were off and I was on tip toes but we both laughed about it and it did break the ice.
Since then we met more and each time we have spent hours, and I mean hours and hours, just opening up to each other about our most deep secrets, mistakes, parts of our pasts, hopes, dreams, desires, flaws etc while hugging and kissing affectionately, laughing and enjoying each others company.
I have told this man things I’ve never told my close friends! He asks me things about myself, remembers what I like or what I say, seems interested in getting to know me and is kind to me so far. He doesn’t over text though
We got carried away kissing last time and this led to the bedroom and it was very passionate. However he said he was so nervous and it had been quite a while since he last had sex after his last relationship that he had some performance issues so we ended up just lying together laughing and talking.
Red flags
🚩the over sharing
🚩He is 50 and said he doesn’t know if he’s ever been in love before. He says he is looking for someone to share his life with.
🚩His last relationship was a disaster and ended very badly they do not get along
🚩he says he’s very fussy about who he dates
🚩He says he’s been in therapy about his last relationship
🚩He’s had a pretty promiscuous past
🚩He says he wants to have sex but he’s overthinking it and is experiencing ED. He’s very physically fit
🚩He is solvent and financially stable and seems lonely but I do think he might drink a little too much too often but that’s not clear yet - he does seem to go to the pub a lot. So I don’t know if that’s a red flag
🚩He really is going very fast with his feelings (faster than me) he keeps mentioning how it’s taken him by surprise and there has genuinely been an occasion where I felt like he was going to say he thinks he’s falling in love with me.
🚩He talks about the future a lot and things we could do together
🚩He showed me his house (which was really nice) and told me all his finances and it felt like he wanted to impress me
🚩He says he wants to impress me a lot
🚩The compliments I get are pretty big and grand, but not too often to make me feel uncomfortable
Only time will tell but is this a sea of 🚩? Or am I just cynical and been on MN too long?
what should I look out for as right now I am thinking is this too good to be true?