The Dating Thread 57 - The Darling Buds

[Nosdacariad]

The Rules:
-The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating
-Develop a thick skin
-Do not invest emotionally too soon
-It’s all BS until it actually happens
-Trust your gut instinct
-People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault
-Know your worth
-If it's not fun, stop
-Loo update is mandatory
-No dating the thread
-Treat others as you'd like to be treated
-Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with
-The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

• If you're wondering if you're being too picky/should give another chance after the second chance/should try harder - the answer is invariably NO! You're not and you shouldn't. If this, now, is as good as it's going to get, the A game, then do you want what comes next?!

-OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item*

Thanks, that's reassuring and helpful. What you said is exactly what I want in the long term ("I’d be good with not moving in, not texting daily and a couple of nights a week but I’d need exclusivity and some assurance within myself that we had just a specific low key relationship but it was indeed that and between just us and they liked me quite a bit too") but I don't think this counts as casual really.

There’s so many definitions of casual nowadays I think - even if both sides have the best intent it’s hard to get it nailed down.

I refer to my last thing as a situationship now as that’s what it was - but that’s only since it about ended ha as that term didn’t seem to be used before.

I’m probably not helped that I grew up with a pair of soulmates as parents - who ‘knew’ immediately, or my Dad did, my ma took a week lol. Imagine if someone was saying they’d met the woman they wanted to marry by the second date - it would be ‘love bombing - avoid’ ha. I never wanted that overwhelming interconnection they had tbh, so I’ve probably got rose tinted specs on as to all the easiness before t’net as I never did so well dating however you define it lol.

@ForRedShark ‘friend zone’ can sound a bit unfair, like someone owes romantic interest x