Continuing AIBU thread 3

[PithyBeaker]

More of the same, and thanks for your support

Gosh that resonates. DH says ‘things break’, and they do, but they break les if you take a modicum of care. My nice mugs, the best small knife…

I don’t care if it was old, it was really good for doing certain jobs and he broke it by using it to cut a swede. Careless fucker.

"Feeling good this morning."

I'm so happy for you! What a relief it must be.

And your house plans sound wonderful!

I'm loving the reclaiming of your mug-style! It seems to be a "thing" they do, doesn't it? My XP also broke everything of mine that he touched, including a ceramic something-or-other that he dropped onto a tiled floor seconds after I had unwrapped it Christmas morning. It was something of my father's that I had always admired when growing up, and he had carefully wrapped it and sent it to me from halfway around the world. Within seconds, it was gone. Clumsy? Accident? I doubt it.

OP, You seem to be doing well so far. And your ex seems to be focused on being busy, so at least you can keep your mind on the party. Good for now.

Keep in mind that once he's finished setting up his flat, and things have moved forward into a routine with his children, he may start looking for reasons to show you how much he's "grown". It's barely been a week. You will need to have your wits about you.

Enjoy the party!

This is awful. I’m so sorry.

Yep, they take less care and then make out we are “materialistic” if we get upset at broken things…. He took the same approach if his kids broke something. Rather than tell them off, tell me I was teaching them that “things” are more important than family if I got upset…. 🤨

@GreenhampsterAndEggs that’s awful about your ceramic, what an asshat 😔Hope you’re well rid

Guessing that somehow he didn't take quite the same approach if his things got broken?

Wow that's awful. Teaching people to have no respect for other people's belongings
I bet if you poured tea over his gaming console he wouldn't the same!!!

That's the same mentality that had him expecting you to share everything and then calling you money-focused for quite rightly feeling utterly drained by the "one-way street" aspect of the whole situation!

I’m amazed at how much less often my stuff is broken now I’m single! I had counselling and I said that, she looked horrified and said ‘He was doing it on purpose?’. I said not necessarily, but he definitely took less care with my things and shrugged when they broke.

And now it's his stuff that will be getting broken due lack of care and he bears the cost of fixing or replacement.

I like the idea of a ceramics room.

Just had to log back in to say: word from the flat is that the kids are coping and the beds are assembled. No drama. And my cleaner has just been and the carpet is out and the house is quiet and peaceful and I’m taking DC out for Friday pizza. Thank you all, from the very bottom of my ventricles. ❤️❤️❤️

Aw this is such good news.

What a relief for all parties involved in this.
You absolutely did the right thing, and you refused to be horrible about him and to him.

You're classy! Hope you and your son have a great evening.

What a lovely peaceful ending.

Have a lovely weekend @PithyBeaker

What a difference a week makes! Well done for staying strong and getting what you needed @PithyBeaker Have a wonderful weekend with your boy...

You've handled this with strength, dignity and grace, proving that you can hold the line without scorching the earth. What a week! Enjoy the peace you've earned.

Oh God my H has broken 3 very special things with sentimental value of mine. Irreplaceable, why did he even need to touch them? Makes my heart hurt a bit every time I think about it😞

Thank you, don't worry, it was more than 20 years ago now and I have moved on! (still remember though)

ps sorry that was for PP , seems to have dropped off the quote

Mine threw away all my piano music.
Stuff I'd had since childhood.

Unbelievable.

He also pretended that he'd lost the beautiful black and white photos of the children, because he didn't want me to have them. He said he couldn't remember what he'd done with them.
He'd paid for them to be taken years earlier, as a fortieth birthday present for me.

Yikes! That's seriously below the belt stuff

OP, sounds like a great Friday evening. Onwards and upwards!

Very happy for you and your DS. Have a lovely weekend OP.

I've read all of your threads on this op and I just want to say that I think you have done everything right, you've dealt with a very difficult situation, incredibly well. I really wish you the best of luck in this new chapter and I hope you and your dc make many wonderful happy memories in your home. I'm a single mother with one dc myself and I've never been happier.