Dating Thread 56 - Love is in the Air

[BoxOfCats]

The Rules:
-The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating
-Develop a thick skin
-Do not invest emotionally too soon
-It’s all BS until it actually happens
-Trust your gut instinct
-People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault
-Know your worth
-If it's not fun, stop
-Loo update is mandatory
-No dating the thread
-Treat others as you'd like to be treated
-Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with
-The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future
-OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy
Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item*

Haha, as I said, I am intentionally trying to be open-minded in who I meet, post 15 years of marriage I am keen to look beyond my normal "type".

Also, there is no guarantee all four will go ahead with the last minute ghosting!

Might have been good to schedule all on one day - like interviews ha - get it out of the way!

It all sounds nice stuff so at least you have nice things to look forward to and naybe one or 2 nice fellas out of that too!

I would never manage to get 4 dates at once - but first dates with a few different ones is good.

I’m thinking date 2 can be a sort of establish whether I like or not though, so I’d probably have to whittle that down if a few come up good - or my brain would explode!

Enjoy - and we need a comprehensive report don’t forget ha!

Excellent @mumobsessedwithdamp have fun! Looking outside of your normal type is a good strategy I think 😊

Wow, that’s impressive. I’ve had a couple of back-to-backers but never 4!

I love the idea of doing it all in a day - book a table in a pub for an afternoon / evening and allocate them strict time allocations each. The difficulty would be if they decided to hang around after the date. Maybe 4 different tables in 4 different (but close to each other) pubs?!

I’m chatting to a guy who seems really nice and normal, is asking lots of questions and looks cute from the photos. But (there’s always a but) he’s younger than me, a LOT younger. Over a decade! From some of the things he’s said it does sounds like we’re at completely different life stages (he doesn’t have kids).

As I’ve got nothing else going on except a couple of mute matches I may as well keep chatting though and see where it goes. One of my matches sent me a rose (Hinge). What’s the point if you’re then not going to say anything?

@MsJinks if you feel kind you could say, "look you great lump of lumber, I expect you to find out when I'm free, invite me out and plan something pleasant."

Otherwise just block him 😁

@Polly1979 I think you just invented dating open-house. Not a bad idea!

Haha… so easy to get them mixed up!

So I have a dinner date with Mr Charismatic tonight. After discovering last weekend that he’s casually dating several other women, I’d messaged him to say we need to chat about where his head is re dating and to make sure we are on the same page.

We were messaging earlier today, we are both working from home and I sent him a pic of my desk. He replied with a pic of his and I noticed a calendar on it. Zooming in, I could see my name written in for tonight. But also I could see three other female names, all for different days earlier this month! Lol.

So I think it will be an interesting convo tonight, but I’m 99.9% sure he will say he’s not up for a relationship, but happy to be FWB….

@BoxOfCatsyou sound like me. I used to always zoom in on any photo my ex used to send me as I didn’t trust him . I was looking for more errant condom wrappers etc . I’m in the wrong job and should be a detective .

Got to keep your wits about you!!

@BoxOfCats my best one was when he was going through his phase of going radio silent for a few hours on a week night and then texting me from Tesco . One night he text me after a silent stint and I used AA route mapper to calculate how long it would take him to drive from his female ‘best friends’ house to Tesco . 11 minute. Sure enough his next text was 11 minutes later from Tesco 😂😂😂

I want to not admire his organisation- but I kinda do as my calendar is not up to date ever lol.

Mind I’ve never had so many dates I’d need to track them on anything!

Well done - I take the high road with my kids and go ‘you don’t need to do that’ - when I would be so definitely doing that and more.

I hope you have a lovely dinner and evening though and I hope the talk is productive.

I'm weirdly invested in the outcome of this, hope you're ok xxx

Good luck @BoxOfCats! Hope it goes well. If Mr Charismatic is open to going exclusive how would you feel about closing the door on Mr Nomad?

Guys, I made a new thread

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/5521142-the-dating-thread-57-the-darling-buds

All good! I’m at his house, haha. Will update in the morning!

Wine and coffee machine - that’s just exactly what a girl needs 😃 Enjoy!

I agree seems perfect!

West Sussex sports business owner - please be warned. Appears very charming but really very damaging. After 3 years of letting myself ‘wonder’ I’ve drawn the line. What the hell has been wrong with me…time to find someone kind and happy to see me.

Late to this, but "I'll be in my garden" is he serious?!! I am reading forwards now.. I hope this one ended up on the manure heap!

Well I don't mind this at all... Mr Soughdough and I rarely texted at the beginning, once between a weekly date maybe and we are more phone calls now with the odd text, but he has turned out to be an absolute catch so I wouldn't judge a man by his texting habits, unless he says something terrible in them. You should say what you want, see what he does. I don't like texting BTW so this suits me, not for everyone...

This is the A-game zone, do you want a man who only steps up when you acknowledge that he didn't the first time? I'd give it some consideration as it won't get better from here on in, in my experience...

Well if they vote themselves off the island, you get home earlier! Keep us posted, excited for you...

@rubberduck68 we've got a new thread, come across and update us on Mr S!

www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/5521142-the-dating-thread-57-the-darling-buds?page=5&reply=151966809

@MsJinks thank you, ill try and go with a positive mindset