To ignore worrying DH ChatGBT conversations

[PlantKiller1]

H and I dont really love each other. Like roommates. We are drifting further amd further apart. We have tried therapy. Didn't work. My kids are v young and ive actually been saving £ in the hope of leaving by the end of the year

He has been more distant than usual. Saying intense things about time and physics when im trying to do regular stuff like cook dinner

I was just on his computer and went to look something up on chatgbt and realised I cpuld see all his chats. And I looked at some of them im afraid

Plenty saying how frigid, cold and career driven i am and how he wants to leave the home for 3 months. Which doesn't surprise me. But other more worrying stuff. One of them being "why do celebrities alwsys do satanic hand gestures" and then questions like "is time linear" "did aliens build the pyramids" and some race theories i cant repeat.

He will say he's just "interested". But he's been withdrawn and distracted recently. Severe mental illness in his family. A close relative lives in supported living because of severity

I dont know what to do. I dont love him. Hes not v nice to me. We havw little in common. But im not sure he's well. But also how can I leave now? My kids might not be safe. I think the stress of divorce might really push him over the edge

Can I just try to forget it? Do I need to do something? He once said some really weird intense stuff a year ago about universes and I ended up calling the GP who told me "disordered thinking" was super common and nothing they could do

That's not a healthy human response OP, he's blackmailing and emotionally manipulating you in abusive ways.

What did "agreeing to do therapy" mean? Who for, and what sort of therapy? As MN often reminds us, there is no point "doing therapy" with an abusive partner.

Sorry I was banging on last night, but your post really reminded me of the situation I was in with ex-DP. I foolishly used the word "schizophrenic" but am not qualified to do so, and you should take that with a pinch of salt, especially as my ex-DP never got a proper diagnosis (still chaotically drifting through life looking for things to get agitated about; we can only hope he does not continue to take responsibility for "fixing" them in violent ways). He could talk a good game when it suited him - under pressure the mask would have slipped, but the few relevant agencies he encountered never bothered to apply any.

You might never understand why he's like this. A lot of people seem to float around in a world of paranoid delusion and no one ever finds out why or does anything about it. Not all, but some of them can become dangerous to others. It's not a chance I would take, especially with children involved.

EDITED TO ADD: Given what you've said now, be very careful not to alert him to your leaving him. Just go as soon as you can do so safely. It sounds as though he will become unstable at the very thought of losing you, even though he treats you badly. In his current mindset, that might be expressed violently if he feels that's necessary to keep you in place.

Lol 😆 me too.

I know the thread has moved on - have not read through.

Whether I believe this or not is irrelevant.

My comment was highlighting the fact that the secret symbols topic was not conjured up by your DH. It is a pre-existing and ongoing topic/discussion on social media and various forums.

These are really odd questions to be typing into a
laptop

really odd.

are your kids teenagers, is it them
or definitely your husband?

Sorry to hear about your relationship issues but the ChatGPT subjects aren't remotely odd. Lots of people including me use ChatGPT to ask whatever questions come into their head for whatever reason.. and your H's questions could have been asked by me! If something occurs to me and I have time in that moment, then I ask. I have even asked questions similar to those specific subjects! I don't consider that odd or worrying at all. Especially as you don't know the full context.. eg re the satanic gestures.. he was probably reading some bizarre headlines from social media fake news and decided to ask chat gpt if it was true. It's the sort of thing I do and despite having ADHD, I don't think I'm that odd

I don’t think you are overreacting.

Focus on making a plan to leave safely as soon as possible.

I don't think there's anything wrong with looking at conspiracy things, or looking into deep concepts such as multiverse theory and time/space and extra dimensions. I have done it myself. Unless they go deep into conspiracy theories and become like, obsessed. It sounds like none of you are getting any satisfaction from the relationship and maybe he's using it as an escape. Unless he is showing any dangerous signs or harming someone? You can always separate amicably and try and remain friendly to check he's okay. Nevertheless, you have to ensure you and the kids are settled and happy, so put that first.

This. Maybe you should screen shot these chat gpt convos in case it becomes relevant later….

If someone would check my Chat GPT searching history - they would probably send me to mental health clinic 😁😁😁😁😁

It's not proof of bad mental health or even that worrying - everything he's asked ChatGPT about is what was discussed on the Louis Theroux manosphere documentary!

Why are people just focussing solely on the ChatGPT stuff? There's much more to this than just that.

I googled 'can psychosis involve developing tics?' OP and Google said.

'While rare, cases have been reported where patients with schizophrenia develop tics during the course of their illness, sometimes appearing as "seizure-like" involuntary movements or vocalizations, often coinciding with severe psychosis.'

I think you know this is not just your DH looking up random shit while bored, his behaviour has been disturbing for quite some time. When you say he went crazy in the house for 48 hours when you tried to end things what did you mean by that? Surely behaviour like that is having a negative impact on your poor kids?

I haven't read the full thread just popping in to say, I don't want to be that person but...celebs do all make satanic hand gestures. They make the sign of Lucifer, cover an eye, make a 'shhh' signal etc - they are all masons. It's literally all of them. Which after the Epstein files probably shouldn't shock people so much.

And it is hard continuing to function in this ever more dystopian reality once you start digging. The fact he's looking tells me he might be a good guy who's possibly worried and shocked by what he's finding.

I would be out of there like a shot. It’s one thing if you love him. But you don’t love each other. Don’t put yourself through it.

I look up totally weird stuff. I find conspiracy theories interesting, doesn’t mean I believe a lot of them. You should just focus your energy on leaving, I think you’ll both be happier.

Unless there's something more going on I wouldn't worry about it. I am really interested in the kind of topics your husband's been reading about. I literally listen to UFO/alien podcasts every night and love learning about different theories in physics, time, the universe etc. I'm a mum, a lawyer, and not mentally ill! Just find it super interesting.

He's abusing you OP. Maybe he has mental health problems that he won't do anything about, maybe he's just a controlling shit - either way, he's abusing you.

I think your first ports of call are your GP and Women’s Aid.

Make sure you see a kind and empathetic GP. If you’re not sure which one that is, the tip from my psychiatrist is to ask the receptionist who is best for anxiety.

Leaving is difficult, OP. My GP told me my DP was abusing me (I had no idea until she told me). It then took me about 2 years to make the decision to leave, although once I made that decision, I left in under 6 weeks. Making the decision was very hard. You need support.

Of course it is. Tbh, he sounds like an interesting intelligent guy. - it’s natural to be curious. Satanism, which is mainly atheistic. Is actually incredibly interesting as are symbols. The question regarding is time lineal is quite a common debating point and your husband is far from the first to research into it. - your DH sounds like 99% of my friends, none of whom are dangerous, is he ND at all? Often these sorts of areas are areas of interest for intelligent people who see the world differently rather than in the standard boring way. If someone tried taking to me about the non- lineal nature of time whilst cooking dinner I’d be ditching the food, ordering a takeaway.

you two clearly aren’t a good match

Why? She didn’t say he was abusive?

Do your friends also lie in bed all day shouting in an empty room, or talk to chatbots about hurting themselves?

For threads like this, MN needs a big flashing banner that says READ OP'S UPDATES

I can't believe people are praising and agreeing with him. What OP has just described is abuse, coercive control

If someone said to me in the pub "how do you reckon the pyramids got built" that is v different to if someone said "isnt it crazy that so many celebrities worshop the devil and have secret symbols"
The first is inquisitive. The second is deeply paranoid.

I disagree with you and think you’re being way OTT.

But the bigger issues here are you going through his ChatGPT conversations at all - this is massively overstepping and quite controlling.

You honestly sound more paranoid and psychotic that DH and I’d be careful that you’re not obsessing over something and therefore being the ‘crazy’ one.

The other issue is him claiming he’ll hurt himself if you leave.
That is abusive.

This needs to end now.
Sit him down and tell him it’s over.
If he has no where to go then you’ll have to start the divorce proceedings.
If he threatens to hurt himself then call the police.

He is her kids dad. I wouldn’t say she has no responsibility at all when it comes to his mental health. Imagine if he hurt himself badly, how that would affect her kids for the rest of their lives? She has some responsibility to think about how health, because of her responsibility for her kids

Specifically ChatGPT is well known for "hallucinating" as it doesn't follow any of the EU laws and regulations. A good AI model to use is Empathy or Deepseek, they're bootsrtaped with checks to stop hallucinations.

From what you're saying your husband is desparatly lonely and it would be kind of you to make the divorce as gentle as your conscious allows.

You need to plan your exit for your own sake and that of your children.
You can't fix someone with mental health issues - that's for a psychiatrist to try to do. Your relationship is over and it sounds like your partner has gone down a rat hole and honestly, I'd leave him there.

Trust your instinct - every time.