wanting another baby

[hayley88]

iv got a son whos now one and i want to try for another baby. my partner says he does not want to at this moment in time but the reason is because of his mum and dad. Hes afraid that they will be to upset and disapointed in him. I have told him several time thats we are our own family now no-one elses opinion matters if we are happy then they should be. I say to him would u be happy if i got pregnant and he says yeah so i say well why cant we try......its really getting to me hes to concerned what other people think but all im concerned about is me and my family (my partner and child). i get lectured everytime i go to his house by his 15 year old brother sayin you cannot have another baby do you want to struggle all your life..... i dont struggle i cope very well and all i want in life is my family im sorry for blabbing on im just sick of everyone ruling our lifes and stopping us doing what we want to do im life.

So where is the 130 pounds a week coming from?

i have been on travelling since i was 3years old i have been to 10destinations....i have had 4 partners and i have been with my partner for 3years i am not relying on tax payers for my 2nd child at all because as soon as my partners qualified in gas as well as plumbing then we will be sorted for life. I am not immature i dont like being judge or dictated to by people that dont even no me. I came on here for people to talk to not to be gettin upset of people i dont know its out of order. i only claim child tax and child benefits which im entitled to i work with avon so thats where i get my money from i get £48 from my tax credit and child benefit so yes the other £100 i do get myself!

I "dare" because you posted on an open forum looking for opinions. I gave you mine. I stick by it. If you can't deal with it, don't post it. Your sob story doesn't wash, everyone here has a difficult tale to tell. The world doesnt owe you and nor do your inlaws whom you disrespect and yet provide a roof over your head.

But you live with your MUM, the 26 that do the same may not be asking for their Mum to support them having many offspring whilst living under her roof. When you become a parent the idea is that you become, at least, financially indepedent of your own.
You must know you are out of order.

26 year old

My best advice to you is to continue your education. Wherever you studied until age 15, it obviously wasn't a place where grammer, punctuation, or spelling was in the curriculum.

You are barely out of your teenage years. This is the time to invest in yourself, for your future.

Ah she lives with HER mum. Still, your IL's are obviously and justifiably concerned about their son and grandchild. And your dp, unlike you, clearly realises that 'no man is an island'. You are part of a family and part of society, you have responsibilities to them but like most bleaters around these days you are more concerned with YOUR 'rights'.

Hayley, I empathise with you because my baby is 4 months old and I'm already misty-eyed about having another one! But you must remember, it all goes up as they age, money-wise.

You have years ahead of you to have more kids. That's the wonderful thing about being a young Mum. I'd cool your boots for a while, keep saving and think about it again in several months' (or years') time.

I hate to sound mean, but were any of your GCSEs in English? Your posts read like long text messages - shorthand spellings ("no" for "know", etc), no punctuation and no paragraph breaks - which isn't really appropriate in a messageboard. It does make it hard to understand what you're saying.

Hope you're soon in your uncle's flat and having a lovely time with your brand-new family.

i do not disrespect my in-laws i actually get on very well with them and several times they have told me they see me as a daughter. i Have metioned many times that i will get myself a flat and then see how it goes from there and i wasnt telling a sob story at all i was just sayin i have been threw a ruff time and i have come threw that and continue to support myself and my child.

I have managed to ignore hayley's hallucinogenic writing style until now but can't stop myself from saying that "i had hemeridge and needed a blood transfusion" made my eyes 'hemeridge' [sic] and even [sick]

Ladies, this english issue is a little off topic and can't imagine it will do any more to convincing hayley88 that becoming a mother of two, in someone elses home, is not a good idea.
Hayley what do you want from life?

i actually got a A in my english gcse i just find it easier to write in short text as its faster and easier i apologise if people cannot understand it xxx

Hayley, it's not easier to write without sentences bacoz if u do ppl hv to really thnk about wot your saying and then it gets to the point wear they dont bvvr because its 2 diifeicult to dessyfer same gos for spelling pause and take yr time just like in life if you take things slow and dont rush things are eazier.

To be honest i think you are all being out of order. Yeah have your opinion but dont gang up on me..whats spelling and other topics got to do with it.

So returing to topic, what do you want from life?

i want to be happy to have a happy family for them to grow up respect people get a good education i want my partner to do well in his career and i want to be the best mummy i can and when iv had my child i will go back into work or start a career.

what do you mean bites tongue?

what are you's on about im confussed hehe xx

What kind of life do you think you are giving your child and will give another? Maybe the people advising you know what it is like to have 2 children as opposed to one easy one.

Your next baby might be a screamer, a night-waker, God forbid have serious health problems. In turn the people around you know they will have to help you in this situation as your first child will suffer, and they want to prevent this. I think you just wanting another baby in your situation is extremely selfish - even your DP is honest enough to admit you are both just keeping above water now with the help and generosity of your family and the taxpayer. Why on earth do you want to push it?

Just get real. Life is very tough as I'm sure you know - you don't have to go around making things tougher for yourself and your child.