Please don’t judge me to hard

[SENDChaos]

This is gonna sound really silly but my anxiety is through the roof.

a man who has been asking me to take me out since 2018 is taking part in a celebrity charity football match (celebrity side) and has asked me to go. It’s a family event so thought it would be something fun to do with my boy for the day as it’s a 2 hour drive each way.

Well now I’m panicking!! The whole influencer life really isn’t my circle so I was hoping to slide in, watch, see him briefly after and then disappear. He has other ideas! He wants me to get there a bit early and take me and my boy in to meet everyone!’

Its gonna be cold and even raining so it’s not exactly a look my best event and I don’t wanna look like a fan girl!!

can someone help me stop overthinking this?!

Could it be that you’re anxious because he isn’t respecting your boundaries?
He has pursued you for months and you have kept him at arm’s length - presumably there’s a reason you haven’t said yes?!
Also, I wouldn’t involve your child so early on.

I’m not going just with my boy, I’ve got a couple of the girls coming with their kids as well so I won’t be on my own.

I’ve kept him at arms length because he’s younger then me, getting child free time is more or less impossible and I’m terrible with dating.

i think it’s more about his life is nothing like mine! Girls chuck theirselves at him and I don’t have that confidence that he does. Sounds silly really

Good grief no. Why would he expect you to do that? Unless of course he arranges for you both to be collected and taken home.

I'd go if it will be fun. But make sure you have an escape route for when you want to leave on your terms.
He's been after you for 8 years ?
How very odd.

I’m driving and so are my other girls so I can escape easy enough plus there’s gonna be loads of people for me to blend in.

I’ve been mum for 12 years and really lost myself which is another reason I’ve agreed to go.

it’s not been consistently for 8 years, it’s been on and off and we started talking because he lost his brother and started working for men’s mental health xx

It sounds like fun. Girls and kids together and some time spent with an admirer ! Enjoy.

No he didn’t expect me to! We was talking about it, I said it sounded like a good day out, that I actually had a friend who lived there and he invited me

That’s exactly what I thought when I decided I’d go.

He’s not A list celebrity but Callum Best is one of his friends and is also playing and he’s absolutely gorgeous!! I just wanna be able to stay cool and not go all silly!!

Im normally the joker out of my group but that’s because I’m actually really shy!!

Your choice then Have fun.
Cba myself

in the convo or going there if it was you? Lol

Oh bugger yes go for it I hope its amazing 😃
Realising you won't be amongst strangers and you'll be safe.
Im just looking out for you @SENDChaos .

lol. I’m just in my head about it. Why would this 31 year old be interested in me who doesn’t leave her house?

I really need to give myself a talking to

@SENDChaos he probably really likes you.

I just have zero confidence in any part of my life except being a mum

You do! You've made a good start here.

DON'T try to get inside his head. He's invited you and your son to this thingy because it's fun and different. Take it as just that, an interesting thing to do with your mates that'll give you some good stories to tell 😎

A very sound, sane strategy is to focus on what you think of the people you meet. Not the other way round! Other folks' thoughts are theirs to think.

Go as yourself, you'll have a better time than if you're being fake. The guy obviously thinks you're good company as you are.

My girls will play buffer if they see me struggling. I suffer with severe depression and anxiety but I think it’ll be a good chance to slowly get back socialising. i think I’ve got to a place where i don’t know who i am outside of being mum.

we’re actually never been in each others company in this 8 years, it’s been social media and on the phone.

You're obviously still in touch so he's a friend, and sounds like he is a good friend. So great fun to meet up with this friend of yours and your son will love it.
Consensus is - you go ! Have 😊 fun X

Thank you!

I know it sounds so silly

😵‍💫

Yes to this!

it’s normal to feel anxious, but do the thing anyway. Sometimes I think I get excitement and anxiety mixed up a bit 🙈 And can’t sleep before doing something new.

Time to be you, whom he obviously likes, and just have a nice time with him and your boy and friends

Rooting for you

Has he asked you as his date for the day or has he asked a lot of people to come to support the charity? If the former as pp has said at least there will be other people around. If the latter just relax and have a great day out with your son.

So you haven't met in real life yet? Have you done video calls?

I would be a bit cautious with this, and if you are going early, ask that the girls can come along too.

Given that you are reassured he is who he says he is and all is ligit, then let yourself relax and have fun. Sounds like the perfect ice breaker to take the pressure off, you will be more at ease if you would like a future date

As an Everton Season Ticket Holder and, therefore a massive football fan, I’d be going just to watch the match - even if it ends up being shite!!

As far as the romantic side of things goes, all I can say is….fill your boots! If there will be a group of you going, so the focus isn’t on you and your little lad, then just treat it as a novel day out and enjoy it! Don’t feel pressured to do anything you don’t want to do and take it from there.

Who knows, in 5 years time you might be the star of a “WAGatha” article in a lifestyle magazine where, sat posing in the kitchen of your £3 million Alderley Edge home, you fondly retell the quirky yet relatable anecdote about how you and said footballer had your “meetcute”, which was just the start to your legendary and unique love affair…..

Or maybe you’ll just watch a half decent game of football….

As an Evertonian, I think I know what I’d want more……..😉😂

Yeah we’ve FaceTimed, voicenotes, I’m on his personal social media’s as well. He’s 100% who he says he is 🤣🤣

me and the girls are all going there together as a group

He has asked me to hang around after and grab something to eat before I drive back.

it’ll all started as a bit of a joke! We was talking about it, he was asking when I was finally gonna let him take me out and I made a joke about just turning up and seeing if he’d even notice me.