DatingThread 55 - Spring has Sprung!

[Nosdacariad]

The Rules:
-The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating -Develop a thick skin
-Do not invest emotionally too soon
-It’s all BS until it actually happens
-Trust your gut instinct
-People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault
-Know your worth
-If it's not fun, stop
-Loo update is mandatory
-No dating the thread
-Treat others as you'd like to be treated
-Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with
-The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future
-OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy
Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item*

He's mid 40's... He's definitely a bit of a unicorn! Absolutely not relationship material but good fun for "itches".

Haha love it!

Ok dilemma - only been back on apps for 48 hours and had a man who looks exactly my type in all ways swipe on me. However, and it’s a biggie, I know his ex fiancee! I wouldn’t say she’s a friend exactly more of an acquaintance but I’ve met her and we’ve got several mutual friends.
Looking at this guys pics as well, he had mutual friends with me too so it’s a mystery his we do t know each other already.

So would the fact I know his ex put you off?

I think it's great, she can give him a reference or not.

All women should freely give reviews to the new squeeze, it would save loads of trouble.

@SupportivePanda welcome!

I seem to be having coffee tomorrow with Mr Ok and potentially with Mr Moist on Sat if he can nail down a time.

Like buses!

Please can whoever posts page #38 start a new thread and link it on page#39 or #40?

We're nearly there 😁

If you remember - add to rules

If you're wondering if you're being too picky/should give another chance after the second chance/should try harder - the answer is invariably NO! You're not and you shouldn't. My reason for saying this - it's been said by the hive mind - if this, now, is as good as it's going to get, the A game, then do we want what comes next?!

I think that dating apps amplify the awkward factor to be fair! I don't really mind the word in real life but when random blokes on Tinder start offering themselves as a "cuddle buddy" my vagina clamps shut pretty quick.

@Kaltenzahni saw a man say snuggles on his profile today! It put me off! I think I have a heart of stone haha

@SupportivePanda welcome! This thread is the best thing about the absolute nightmare that is online dating.

@TwistedWonder go for it! Unless their breakup was very recent, very acrimonious and very much his fault I don't see why there should be an issue. It's a small world, if you're dating in your local area you're bound to be bumping into people who have dated people you know.

@Nosdacariad Mr Moist is my least favourite iron name on the entire thread. Dare I ask where the name came from?

@Catza the thing with the neurodiversity is that wasn't why we split up (I dont think) so im wondering whether its tarring all by the same brush. Ive no plans to have kids or move in with someone either. That said, ive got a habit of being the nurturing one in a relationship and I feel ill end up doing that again.

@TwistedWonder id be wary but id probably still chat! Its a small world.

Went on a date with Mr Tall. Looked nothing like his profile picture! It was him but the photo must have been at least 10 years old. He seemed nice enough but I didn’t fancy him. He paid for the meal using a discount voucher so I guess that’s why he chose that place! I won’t be seeing him again.

That just leaves Mr Intellectual on the irons front who seems lovely but is overseas at the moment. We’ve said about meeting up when he’s back, so we’ll see.

I would use the connection to try and find out more about him! That’s one of the things I don’t like about OLD and meeting complete strangers - you can’t verify them and what they are telling you.

@Kaltenzahn MrMoist is a damp surveyor and turned out to be not up to my expectations so is now blocked. He asked for my number three messages in, I said he could have it if we met, he gave me his and told me to whatsapp him.

@Polly1979 did Mr Tall think you wouldn't look at him? Had he time travelled a lot?! Also voucher, first date?!

Thanks all. The situation is we actually live 40 miles apart and his ex gf lives even further. We’ve just bumped into each other at music events over the years.
And what’s even more strange is that my male best friend of 20 years is one of his closest mates - and yet we’ve never met!

I did bite the bullet and match with him and we had a back and forth chat yesterday so let’s see.

There was one photo taken at distance where he looks a bit more like he does now but his main profile pic and the first few he looks like a different person!

I hate any hint of cheapness so vouchers on a first date is definitely not a good look. Not like it was a favourite place as he said he’d never been before! So it was literally like ‘which place has an offer on?’ when he was looking for a place.

@TwistedWonder sounds promising! Keep us posted.

My friend went on a date with a man who pulled out a 50% off mains voucher, told the waitress they wouldn’t be having desserts and shouted up the bill, told my mate it was his treat then in the car park afterwards asked her if she fancied climbing into the back of his car!
When she refused he told her if he’d known she was ‘frigid’ (his word) he wouldn’t have bothered and sent her a text with his bank details to pay for her share of the bill.

She blocked immediately! And this man was in his 50’s ffs

Just going to meet Mr Ok for coffee. Wish me luck 😁

Good luck! Do come back and report

Fingers crossed he’s better than okay @Nosdacariad xx

Discount voucher is fine in everyday life, but displaying it on a date, I don't know about that so much... also 10 years older, no... next

Nosdacariad Ooh hoping it's going well!

good luck, can't wait to hear how you get on!

It can be nice dating someone you have friends with in common in that they kind of have an in-built reference on board so you know they are safe and good. If she's not in your real inner circle of friendship, I think it's fine, obviously if she is that might require checking in with her first?

I liked Mr Ok a lot. I told him to message me. How long do I give him?

To be honest she’s a vague acquaintance I’ve crossed paths with on a handful of occasions. She’s a long term friend of my mates partner so more a friend of a friend.

If it was a close friends ex, i absolutely wouldn’t go there.

Anyway he’s calling me tonight so let’s see how that goes.

How long since you told him?