Life is pointless when your single

[OnionOnions]

How can you stop feeling like life is pointless empty or sad if you don’t have a partner? I really wish I was one of those people that loved or embraced being single but I don’t I absolutely hate it. The only reason I stay single is because I’m a single parent and have my kids full time so can’t make a relationship work. If I didn’t I would be doing anything I could to find a loving relationship. I just feel life is better when you have someone by your side, to share it with. Is it normal to feel this way? I’m in my 30s so most people are settling down now and I feel like I will be alone forever.

I’m not going to anymore, I’m unwatching this thread. Exhausting.

Yes, lots of single mums do have family who can do childcare for them, but you don't.
So what are you going to do? You can either look at all of the avenues that have been suggested here to find someone to watch your know ds while you date, or decide you don't want to do that, and find a way to get happy being single.
All you're doing at the moment is wallowing in something you have decided not to try to fix.

So no response or "wow, good idea I can try that" to any of the other suggestions I (or others) have come up with, but you immediately home in on the one idea you can immediately reject because it fits with your view of everyone on facebook being nutcases.

You clearly just want validation of your woe is me complex, which will only cause you more distress and unhappiness. I wish you well regardless.

You're feeling sad about your situation and getting very little empathy on here. I totally get that using a stranger as a babysitter is scary - your children are so precious. You might decide to sift through the suggestions another day and be open to something that could work for you in the future? Good luck 💐

@OnionOnions

No one is suggesting you go to random places on Facebook.
Use your community pages, school whats app group.
Do your kids do clubs ? Speak to the parents there.
Sometimes school TAs looking to earn a bit extra will babysit.
Ask people at work for recommendations

No school WhatsApp and they don’t go to clubs

Thank you.

@OnionOnions if I didnt have family, i wouldn't be leaving my kids with any strangers, definitely not babysitters, but thats my choice. I dont trust anyone apart from my sibling. That said, my friend has a friend and they take it in turns to babysit each other's kids so each can go out. Maybe you need to invest in more friendships where youd trust that person to have the children. Also, at our school, families have nannies etc so have recommended them to others on ad hoc basis'. I know its not ideal but at least this gives you a bit more freedom.

Well that’s exactly what I mean, I wouldn’t leave them with people I didn’t know. it’s just not for me. I have friends but they don’t want to babysit my children which is fine I don’t expect anyone to. Making friends with the intention of them babysitting my kids seems a bit cheeky. It’s ok I will wait for them to grow up this was more just venting which some people understood, others didn’t.

Its not cheeky, you make friends and some may do it, some won't. I dont babysit that friend's kids because I don't want the responsibility but she has some who would.

Could they go to clubs? That would give you some time to yourself.

They have gone to clubs in the past but they are not at any atm. The clubs they’ve been to have clashed though so they are never all away at the same time due to different interests.