Is a man being bisexual a turn off?

[Username3021]

As a man I think im bisexual but when it comes to dating and being in relationships I only see myself with women, I also want a family someday also. Apparently lots of women are turned off by bisexual men where as a lot of men dont mind bisexual women, I also dont like the idea of hiding it from my future partner because I think your partner should know everything.

Would my sexuality be a problem?

Yes it would bother me. Im not against it in any way my own son is gay! But I don’t know it just would.

What you actually said was:

"That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t examine your reasons though and question why you think certain negative things about bisexual people."

Why is thinking someone is gay (rather than bisexual) a negative thing? Your thoughts and feelings appear to be routed in homophobia.

You see that's the bit I find odd. For me the romantic aspect is so interwoven I couldn't really envisage attraction without it. It's the bit that makes it meaningful.

So for me, yes it would a turn off to know I was in a relationship with someone who was perfectly capable of attraction without that underpinning it. It would remind me of those terrible motorised rubber penises they used to use for sex education where the educator pushed a button and the flaccid penis became erect to demonstrate how to put on the condom - sort of unpleasantly mechanical.

lol. Seriously, try harder. You’ve got nothing to add in good faith to this discussion.

Is a man being bisexual a turn off?

For me personally? Completely.

I suspected that may be difficult to answer.

@BarbarasRhabarberba
How is this bigotry?
Assuming someone would treat a bisexual person the exact same way as they'd treat a heterosexual person, as a friend, family member, employee, patient, customer, student, pupil, political candidate etc. etc.
So literally only having a sexual preference?

I couldn't be with a bi sexual man, I even cringe when seeing men kissing passionately on TV, and anything more is even worse so a massive no.

I wouldn’t want to be with a man who I knew had had sex with other men, no.A turn off and I would be concerned about health risks.Same here.

Wouldn’t do it for me personally but I’m sure lots wouldn’t mind!

I don't think it would bother me but I've never dated anyone who told me they wwrw bisexual so who knows.

To be monogamy is monogamy and people who want to cheat will do so regardless of the sexuality.

All that said, I fundamentally disagree with the notion everyone is a little bisexual. It's just not true. I'm female and straight. I have never had any sexual feeling towards a woman. If I see a stunning looking woman, I can appreciate it but I would think, I wish I had her figure or her looks as opposed to I'm attracted to her. Why do a lot of people find that so difficult to comprehend?

Have you read the reasons people have given? A bi man won’t be monogamous, they’ll cheat, it’s repulsive, they want to use a woman as a beard or a human incubator, they’re just gay and won’t admit it… if you don’t think any of those things are prejudice I don’t know what to tell you.

Me too, I look away. Makes me feel ick

So if I refuse to date a man because I think he's gay, that makes me a bigot and I should examine my preferences and date him immediately? What if I examine my preferences and yep, still think he's gay, still don't want to date him. Am I homophobic now too? What is the blueprint for attraction that people MUST adhere to?

Oh come on now this is just plain old homophobia.

Yeah, this thread is pretty eye-opening. I didn't realise people would be happy to be blatantly, openly bigoted, and weirdly proud of it.

Would you have the same reaction to a man who has had anal sex with women before? And would you consider it sexual coercion if a man failed to disclose that he had had anal sex with a woman (or that he had never had the opportunity for anal sex with a woman but that it was something he found appealing and would be very much interested in if the opportunity presented itself) before asking you out on a date?

So if a gay man thinks straight sex is disgusting, does that make him hetrophobic? What if he thinks lesbian sex is disgusting, is he also homophobic?

There’s no “reason” about it. We’re talking about sex, not rejecting a bi person as a friend or an employee. Sex belongs in the non-verbal, non-reasoning realm. It belongs in the realm of the body and the psyche. You can’t alter your sexual preferences willy nilly to suit whatever is politically correct / in vogue at any given moment.

oh my fucking god. Where have I said you should date him immediately? I haven’t. You’ve invented that. Yes, you should examine your prejudices. No, that is not the same as saying you should date him. THINKING is not the same as DOING. You understand that, right? And yes, if you think a man who says he BI is GAY that is absolutely phobic, because you’re invalidating someone’s orientation and implies bisexuality is not a sexuality in and of itself

If they have a problem with it then they’re not the right women for you, a bisexual man, to have a relationship with. Find someone who is cool with it and then you can be honest and your relationship is more likely to last.

Can you answer the question rather than resorting to false equivalences? Are those statements prejudiced or not?

@BarbarasRhabarberba
Ok that may be the case about those reasons, as they say something about how the "someone" views the bisexual person's personality.

But what if someone is just sexually turned off by the thought of men having sex with men, and hence would not be sexually attracted to a bisexual person?

While treating bi / gay people the same as everyone else in all non romantic/sexual contexts ( as per my previous post - employee, friend etc etc.)

Girl

Its a feminist take. Honestly, its everywhere, women being used for their womb and then dumped and labelled 'homophobic or biphobic' if they arent supportive of the man who was 'bisexual but loved women and wanted a family' but has suddenly discovers theyre gay once the kids are here

I would sleep with an (openly) bi man who is clear that its just sex, why not, as long as he fancied me back

But someone who says stuff that was in the op, is someone you need to fucking run from.