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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Long winded text I've written to send to a man I like, thoughts?!

436 replies

BeBe05 · 09/11/2025 16:58

Hi T , because I've felt like this since last December. Would you like to come over for a drink some time? (When the kids are in bed) I know you probably won't , but just in case you do want to get to know me better, I thought I'd ask. As I know this is awkward. If you don't reply I'll take it as a no. And when I next see you , please be the same as before , although I may laugh. Because that's what I do when I'm embarrassed. Also, please don't tell anyone either way.
Also, I'm guessing no. Feels like when I was 8 years old and I told a boy called Lawrence in my class I Iiked him, I was so innocent. He called me a pig and broke my little heart. I still am innocent. I feel this maybe this again but hopefully without you calling me a pig. A thing I've made up in my head, because you are a polite man who doesn't gruff at me and surprises me when you talk from your heart. I've.not been use to that apart from with my brother's . P never would. Also, he would call me expletives most days, so any man not doing that would unfortunately gain my interest. God what an essay.
Don't reply please as I know it's completely crazy .
Also, just so you know every time you waved hello at me in the morning on the school run in your van. You made a woman who had so low self esteem feel just a little bit better about herself. Like she mattered enough to be noticed. Thanks for that.
And, also please don't be weird with me after this , as I really was hoping to ask you if you could help with the training at school (if your doing that) as my younger two go to bed at 7:30 .
Anyway , have a nice evening , and also thanks for how much you give to L at football, your a good guy.

OP posts:
Aluna · 09/11/2025 17:47

Nooooo

DeirdreDragon · 09/11/2025 17:47

Mental.

tripleginandtonic · 09/11/2025 17:47

That sounds so pathetic OP, Im cringing on your behalf. It sounds like an 8 year old writing it Just ask him to come round for a drink.

TheWalkingEyebag · 09/11/2025 17:48

Please don’t send that - it won’t elicit the response you hope for. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a casual message like:

‘Hi T, I just wondered if you fancied a drink some time? My way of saying thank you for all the help you’ve given L at football!’

Then you can go from there.

jenny38 · 09/11/2025 17:49

No no no. Do not send this. Next time you see him just ask him if he fancies a drink sometime? No need to expand on your whole history.
If you must text instead, I would say something simple like, hi x, do you fancy popping round for a drink one night next week? If he says he's busy, you have your answer.

Butchyrestingface · 09/11/2025 17:50

starpatch · 09/11/2025 17:00

Honestly I think you should ring him.

You think that text would improve on being read aloud? Grin

dailyconniptions · 09/11/2025 17:50

Wind up.

Justcallmedaffodil · 09/11/2025 17:50

I hope it was cathartic to write it out here, but please don’t send it!

begonenicotine · 09/11/2025 17:50

Strong no

CarrierbagsAndPJs · 09/11/2025 17:50

change it to: Hi T, would you like to meet for a drink some time?

notes:
NOT in your home with your children asleep ffs.
Dont trauma dump.

HonestGoldAnt · 09/11/2025 17:51

Do not send.

Elle771 · 09/11/2025 17:53

😱😱😱

Barrenfieldoffucks · 09/11/2025 17:53

Sooooo many no's.

JellyBabiesmunch · 09/11/2025 17:54

Just no.

shuggles · 09/11/2025 17:55

@BeBe05 Man here.

Maybe I'm weird, but I think if I received a text like that my heart would probably melt.

Olivetawny · 09/11/2025 17:56

TheFatCatSatOnTheMat · 09/11/2025 17:05

If someone sent me that guff I’d be worried for my safety. Get a fucking grip OP, this is not normal.

Too mean.

crappycrapcrap · 09/11/2025 17:56

Christ no.

OnlyOnAFriday · 09/11/2025 17:56

Don’t send please don’t. Just send him a message asking if he’d like to meet for a drink. Nothing else.

OnlyOnAFriday · 09/11/2025 17:57

shuggles · 09/11/2025 17:55

@BeBe05 Man here.

Maybe I'm weird, but I think if I received a text like that my heart would probably melt.

And in some sort of chick lit romance novel that would happen. In real life not so much.

Hons123 · 09/11/2025 17:58

No, no, no, have some self-respect! If you send it, you will feel crushed with embarrassment the following day!

Tuesdayschild50 · 09/11/2025 17:59

Don't send.

shuggles · 09/11/2025 17:59

OnlyOnAFriday · 09/11/2025 17:57

And in some sort of chick lit romance novel that would happen. In real life not so much.

In real life, it would depend on the man.

Chase an asshole, get an asshole's response.

Chase someone who is gentle and kind, get a gentle and kind response.

Bikergran · 09/11/2025 18:00

Just don't.

ginasevern · 09/11/2025 18:01

Fuck no. Is this real?

singthing · 09/11/2025 18:01

You don't need to send it, you've already had the tortuously long conversation all by yourself, both sides.