Lied about his height

[rubberduck68]

I went on a date last night (met online). In his profile he said he was 6ft (I have nothing set for height restrictions) but when he turned up I knew he was not 6ft. My ex-husband, family members and male friends are 6ft. I know what 6ft looks like. I’d put him at 5ft 10” on a good day. I asked him about it and he said, “I’m 5ft 11” seemed silly to worry about an inch.” I don’t care how tall he is, but I am worried that this is an indication that he will lie about other things too? I don't date the men who put in their profile “Not really 55, 65” as though my chosen age filters are not important. Is this the same?

Anyone dated someone who lied about this online, and they turned out to be an honest, okay guy?

Thing is... (dear, honest) friend, I saw her dating profile... the photo was side on and it REALLY didn't show her size. I dare say that photo took 45-60lbs + off of her true size. It felt like a lie to me.

So yeah... men add to height & women deduct from weight, is very common. And that's before somebody tarts up or does photoshop to their picture.

Surly his just rounding up, its only 1 inch if he is 5ft 11, my husband and I met online he said he was 49 he was 51, he admitted it straight away and his reasoning was valid, many people have a cut off point like below 50 so he just wanted to keep within that , my cut off age was 50 if he hadn't of " white lied" we would never of met, we have been together 10 wonderful years and he really is the most wonderful person ever.

erm no, i don't think that.

I couldn't tell you the last time i was measured in all honesty. If someone asked my my height i could guess but it wouldn't be accurate, i would be within 2 or 3 inches of my actual height.

Curiously, my height was measured in a health check recently and it’s dropped by half an inch (1cm). I was previously 5’6.5 and now I’m 5’6. So I could have seemingly ‘lied’ about my height, but it would have been in good faith. (I was very surprised as my height had been the same for a very long time.)

As it happens, I am attracted to tall men (my DH is 6’5), but I wouldn’t have even commented if I thought my date had added an inch to his height. I wouldn’t even have been sure enough to accuse them of lying.

Same! I thought I was 5ft 5 until I was measured recently and it turns out I’m 5ft 4 😳, so if I’d ever done online dating I could have inadvertently lied about it!

It sounds like you have made your mind up, if that white lie is something you can't forgive then just don't meet him again.

People's height typically changes throughout the day and in the evening you are an inch shorter than you were in the morning. This is due to gravity and muscles and ligaments compressing throughout the day. You reset over night and then the process repeats the next day etc.

So this is why the whole "he lied over an inch" is rather silly. A morning or evening date could make a "massive" (1 inch) different for the OP.

If that happens to everyone then the relative height difference between people remains roughly constant.

Lying about height is incredibly common for men as many women won't consider a guy under 6".

That’s a totally fair concern — and honestly, you’re not overthinking it. When someone lists a detail like height inaccurately, it’s rarely about the inches themselves; it’s more about what it says regarding honesty and self-awareness.
That said, it’s not always a clear red flag — it depends why he did it and how he handles being called out. Some people round up a bit because they think everyone does, or because they feel insecure and think “it’s harmless.” Others will double down or get defensive, and that’s where you can learn a lot about character.
From what you said — he claimed he was 6ft, then when you questioned it, he shifted to “5’11, silly to worry about an inch” — that’s a small lie followed by a bit of dismissiveness. That doesn’t automatically mean he’s untrustworthy, but it does give you a glimpse of how he might handle being wrong or uncomfortable.
A few people do end up dating someone who fudged their height or age online and turn out fine — if the person shows genuine integrity and transparency once they get to know each other. The lie doesn’t define them, but how they respond when confronted can.
If you liked other things about him, it’s okay to give it one more chance while keeping your eyes open. But if you’re already feeling uneasy about his attitude toward honesty, that intuition is worth trusting too. It’s not about height — it’s about respect.

Estimates suggest women swipe right on about 5% to 6% of profiles on dating apps, while men swipe right on a much higher percentage, around 53% to 62%, with these stats from such platforms such as Tinder, Bumble, etc. As well, the "6-6-6 rule" is a popular dating idea that females suggest ideal partners must be at least 6 feet tall, have 6-pack abs, and earn 6 figures a year. You wonder why men aren't always honest about a few inches now?

You are saying that in a way which suggests that dating profiles are of a similar standard and that women are being unreasonably picky.

The vast majority of men’s dating profiles are very very poor, and indicative of individuals who will subtract from your life rather than add to it.

I’m 5’9”, I never use the height filter, I have no idea on swiping what someone’s salary will be, and I am old enough to know that a six pack lifestyle isn’t what I want at all. In my opinion the 6-6-6 trope is invented by men to criticise women and to avoid looking at whether they are someone worth being in a relationship with (you know kindness, communication, sharing the tasks)

The fact that most men under 6’ are in relationships suggests you are wrong.
The fact that most women are in relationships with men less than 6’ demonstrates that you are definitely wrong.

One every man on international dating has exaggerated their height by an inch or 2 - unless they are actually well over 6ft. I know it’s a lie but you might find yourself cutting your pool down significantly if it’s a deal breaker 😬

I suppose 2 out of 3 ain't bad. A 6'+ guy will be too busy working stupid hours for his "6 figures+" to acquire or maintain a six pack!!!!

“The vast majority of men’s dating profiles are very very poor, and indicative of individuals who will subtract from your life rather than add to it.”

This part - so true. I was talking to a man I thought was 31 since his profile said so. Didn’t answer when I asked what he studied at uni (he claimed postgrad on his profile) then he said he worked at a winter resort. I had to pull out of him what he did for the rest of the year (bar work in Ibiza). It was basically casual work and not the lifestyle I’d want, but I said “well I guess you are a bit young compared to me” (I’m late 30s)

He immediately said “oh no I’m 41. I just made a mistake and the app won’t let me change it” Pathetic lie.

Taking one or two years to avoid being filtered out is one thing but lying about a decade is downright scary. The only thing this man was offering was lies so I unmatched. Good luck to the younger women who match with him!

He will probably tell himself it’s because he wasn’t earning 6 figures. But I specifically said in my profile I wanted someone ambitious so even if he was say a teacher it would’ve been fine. Doesn’t need to be earning big bucks. It’s the lies and lack of stability/career that wasn’t fine.

.

That’s proper ‘manosphere’ talk, right there

It is. These red pill men are also being disingenuous when they trot out those figures. Just because men will swipe on every second woman it doesn’t mean they actually are interested in properly dating them let alone having a relationship.

Men who are looking for FWB will happily swipe right on women who have stated serious relationships only.

It literally is a numbers game for them so the way they see it is the more they swipe the more matches they’ll get. Out of those matches they often don’t bother actually messaging the women or will even unmatch once they’ve got their ego boost.

And even when they do bother messaging the women, they’re often being creepy or extremely low effort with terrible conversations skills.

A significant number of the men on dating apps are actually not single as well! They are on there for validation or to get casual sex. I’ve had men try and rush me off the dating app onto WhatsApp or telegram which is often a sign they’re not single and just want to sext.

I was just watching the show married at first sight the other day and one of the grooms has been caught on Hinge by his brides flatmate weeks into the process.

I was actually talking to a (short) man around this the other day. He basically said that he gets no interest from OLD due to his height, he met someone IRL who told him that she filters out men under 6ft on OLD, but that IRL it didn't matter to her and that she found him personally appealing IRL.

So it seems to me that people are basically seeking unicorns on OLD, whilst not using the same filtering criteria IRL. The unreasonable expectations from OLD (that are not persisted IRL) are a driving factor in people's unhappiness.

That makes sense. IRL, you get to know people naturally and you can find that you fall for someone who isn’t your usual ‘type’.

6 ft tall women here who hated the apps lol.

If he says he's 5"10 he is 5 ft 8.

If he says he's 6 ft he's 5'10 max.

At my height I only went for profiles that said 6'2 +. My DH said he was 6 ft and I said f it cause he's so hot and be turned out to be 6 ft 3 🤣

cant believe there are 400+ posts about 1 inch

If you actually read the posts you’ll find most are not just about “one inch” but are discussing related wider issues which have been thrown up.

I wouldn't bother seeing him again.