I’m in a right mess. What the fuck do I do?

[IAmInAPickle]

I am 26, I have a stable job and my own house so that doesn’t have a bearing on the situation I am in.

My ex and I (I’ll call him Leo for the sake of this post) broke up a year ago. It was entirely mutual, because we were both too busy to dedicate enough time to our relationship. We’d been together for two years and it honestly broke my heart. We were both just as upset and heartbroken as each other, but we knew it had to happen because we just weren’t good partners for each other. He has always felt like my “what could have been”, he was the right person at the wrong time.

About twelve weeks ago, I met up with a friend (I’ll call him Adam) for coffee. Adam mentioned quite off the cuff that he had always liked me and wanted to take me on a date. I agreed, because I really liked him too and decided it would be fun.

After a couple of dates it became clear that the limit of our relationship was lust, and wouldn’t become romantic.

We ended up in a sort of friends with benefits situation and it was all good, until I realised that I’ve missed my period. I’ve done a test and it’s positive, and I think I’m about four weeks.

I’ve told Adam and he has said the ball is entirely in my court. If I want the baby, he will step up and we can coparent. If I don’t, he’ll support that.

I was leaning towards keeping the baby until Leo texted me and said he misses me, he wants to give things another go and he is serious about me. This has really thrown my head into a scramble.

i don’t know what I’m hoping to achieve by posting this and I guess I just need some sort of advice because I don’t know what to do

But you could have got the morning after pill!

Glad it worked out for you

The OP might want to read the dozens of I'm a single parent I'm miserable threads on here, or the constant blended family nightmare threads to get some other perspective. Happily she seems to have made her mind up.

Unless it's daddy's law firm?

Do you think abortion is acceptable as a form of contraception?

I think we live in a country where we have free access to abortion. Abortion is healthcare.

I didn’t realise to. It’s really not that awful a mistake.

I don’t exactly see what my relation to my employer matters here. It’s nasty, vindictive people who have tried to tear me down who are questioning it.

I think you’ve made a wise and sensible decision OP. You have your whole life ahead of you.

I would keep baby because I would never have an abortion and that is exactly what I did 16 years ago, had a lovely single life for 9 years then met a lovely man, got married had another 3 children, he is a great sdad every single child is treat the same and my oldest now 16 sees him as his dad tho has always been aware as he got older that his real dad never bothered with him. Recently 16 year old decided he wanted to see real dad, made a date to meet we arrived and waited and waited almost 3 hours and his real dad never showed up as arranged and ignored son text and calls. Luckily my hubby was in area and came straight to cafe we were at went straight to 16 year old said come on son let's go home and since that happened in April son has never asked about his biological dad again.

side bar: WTF is "content creation" ? I keep seeing it on social media, but what is it?

Id be in the clinic ditch both men and move on with my life.
But thats if it was me i do wish you the best op.

Posters are questioning the city law on 3day week & side hustle as it’s not the norm 3yr post qualifying. It really isn’t.You would normally be immersed in career with training contract & appraisals. Not giving up steady career,money and progression for a side hustle
3 day week in a lawyer I’m thinking solo practitioner family firm above a retail outlet on zone 6. Doing conveyance.

are you Kim Kardashian doing the
baby bar and beauty business hustle?

are you Nepo lawyer? Swishing about in family firm?

Whatever you're on about regardless of the thread, you can have an abortion for any reason you like

This is your answer.

What on earth does this have to do with anything?

@Barrenfieldoffucks , it's not an alternative to using contraception.
If someone has unprotected sex, they can get the morning after pill.

What, you didn't realise you had unprotected sex? How drunk were you? If you couldn't remember what happened, it would have been wise to get the morning after pill anyway.

Oh my god will you all leave her alone!!!

Absolutely mental - she asked for some advice as she’s in a tough situation and has to make a massive life changing decision!

No need for constant judgmental posters going on with themselves because she had unprotected sex or bashing her job!

Some of you are absolutely shocking!

Jesus Christ have none of you been young?

Yes, I fucked up. Yes, I realise that, I had had a very stressful few days and got pissed with a friend and had sex. Is that really crime of the century?

No, but getting pregnant means there's a living thing taking the consequences.

You’re the lawyer you know it’s not a crime however the it’s the impact of the inactivity after the event eg unplanned pregnancy. No MAP has had significant consequences you’ve had to tell one friend that he’s the father of your baby. You have to tell your exboyfriend whom you still have a romantic connection to that another man got your pregnant. As a result, now you’re having to plan an abortion. Most definitely not a crime certainly a lot of consequences for an unplanned event when you can take the morning after pill up to 5 days after unprotected

The embryo is not a living thing. I have to get an abortion, yes, but that’s not a crime either.

How can you say it isn't a living being?

Because biologically at this stage it isn’t.

It is a living thing like an amoeba isxa living thing. It is a clump of cells that she could easily bleed out without ever being any wiser.

Far better to terminate now than to bring an unwanted child into the world.

Lay off with the forced birth nonsense.