Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Mounjaro affecting friendship

202 replies

MounjaroBore · 11/09/2025 13:00

Name changed for this and i'm posting it in relationships because there is no aibu and weight loss injections isn't the appropriate outlet because people are there seeking support.

I have a friend who has recently gone on mounjaro. A few months ago. She wasn't that overweight, and only had about a stone and a half to lose.

I'm happy for her that it's doing what she wants, but I am finding it's affecting our friendship. Whenever we go out, she's decided she wants to go for dinner despite being unable to eat more than a few mouthfuls. She eats barely a few mouthfuls of her dinner and then asked the restaurant to box it up.

All she talks about is mounjaro, and how much weight she's lost. She shares about buying needles off the internet for the golden dose and the extra dose, and tells me about the new community community, she's found on reddit, to help her do this. She said she's beginning to feel like a drug addict.

Whilst doing this, she encourages me to finish everything on my plate and order more food. I am a bit overweight, too, and I was actually more overweight than she was. I suggested perhaps I should get it and she was like, no, you don't need to lose weight.You look great order something else... encouraging me to order more food.

She keeps asking me if she looks as if she's lost weight. Every time I see her. She tells me how many people haven't commented on her weight loss and she wishes, they would.

She tells me this every time I see her and I reply with the same thing every time I see her which is it is generally a faux pas to comment on someone's weight. Perhaps people haven't noticed or if they have, they don't want to comment because it's impolite to mention somebody's weight.

Sorry. What's going on here? We've been friends for years suddenly I need to eat more food when I was more overweight than her to start with and all she talks about is her weight loss. She seems to ask me to go out for dinner with her to demonstrate me how little she eats.

She had her dinner boxed up, and she made such a thing of it that she'll barely be able to eat the other half for lunch tomorrow.

I don't want to back away from the friendship, but the last few times I ve met with her.I end up eating alone with her commenting.How little she eats and how I don't need injections.On how I should eat more.

The last time we did something that didn't involve eating.We went to the cinema. But then when she got home, she texted me to ask what I was having for dinner, and I told her, and she said she was eating nothing. She just has to get it in how little she has eaten or how she's eaten nothing.

Any idea how to handle it tactfully. Or just ignore.

OP posts:
HansHolbein · 11/09/2025 13:03

Of all the people I know taking Mounjaro, including myself, none of us behave like that. All sounds very extreme.

I would have an honest conversation with her about it.

IWantThisJob · 11/09/2025 13:05

Oh that sounds a bit rubbish for you. I would hate to be eating on my own with someone commenting along! Personally I would stop doing things with her that will involve eating. I’d suggest your next meet up time/place to avoid food entirely if possible.

But if it’s too much, this is your permission to put yourself first and stop seeing her.

YodasHairyButt · 11/09/2025 13:08

If she’s a good friend, have the conversation. Tell her she’s coming across as obsessive and it’s making you uncomfortable. I’d be wondering if she’s getting something out of watching you eat, that feels a bit odd to me.

pikkumyy77 · 11/09/2025 13:09

I think you are noticing something real and a bit creepy. I would be honest with her and tell her she is becoming a bore. I wouldn’t see her if food is involved. Just say no and wnd any interaction that starts to involve weight loss talk. Its like squirting a cat with water if it climbs on the table.

MounjaroBore · 11/09/2025 13:10

Also I was moreover, weight than she was an I too have an underlying health condition that makes me prone to put it on weight. PCOS

I'm already on diabetes drugs for the pcos. She was telling me she was on it for underlying health reasons, and I said, I have them, too

She said, how amazing it is.Its switched off all of her food noise, and she doesn't think about it anymore. I really struggle with that. Constantly craving food.So every reason I said I probably should be on it too.She said there was no need for me to have it.

What is going on here. I am just really sick of it. I'm beginning to feel embarrassed if I clear my plate in front of her.

OP posts:
Suednymph · 11/09/2025 13:13

Honestly I would stop going out with her. How bloody boring like to talk about weightloss injections. Honestly she sounds like a twat.

pikkumyy77 · 11/09/2025 13:13

She means to embarrass you. She wants to put you into a competition that you lose without risking your joining the competition and “winning.” She isn’t friends with you because she likes and supports you. She is constructing a world in which you are cast as her ugly wingman at the bar so she looks better.

gfaorrmeirnr · 11/09/2025 13:15

She isn’t a freind she is an utter arsehole.

Suednymph · 11/09/2025 13:15

Agree with @pikkumyy77 she is actually trying to fatshame you, irony of course her taking the easy way out to lose weight to do it. I would needle shame her back lol

twilightcafe · 11/09/2025 13:16

pikkumyy77 · 11/09/2025 13:13

She means to embarrass you. She wants to put you into a competition that you lose without risking your joining the competition and “winning.” She isn’t friends with you because she likes and supports you. She is constructing a world in which you are cast as her ugly wingman at the bar so she looks better.

Blunt, but true.

She no longer sees you as a friend - just competition.

QueenClinomania · 11/09/2025 13:16

She wants you to stay fat.

MounjaroBore · 11/09/2025 13:17

Suednymph · 11/09/2025 13:15

Agree with @pikkumyy77 she is actually trying to fatshame you, irony of course her taking the easy way out to lose weight to do it. I would needle shame her back lol

I was going to take my weight loss journey more seriously, but i'm just quite lazy and it's difficult. I've had a lot going on at work lately.And it's just one of those things.

If I do end up losing the weights I don't want to do it with injections because I m worried about the side effects. I'm not that overweight, so I see it as the risks to my health by being a bit overweight are lower than the risks of being on those injections and the side effects. I only have about 1.5 to 2 stone to lose.

Maybe I should go and lose a pile of weight and tell her I did it without drugs to do it.But I would never do that. I'm not an arsehole. It's not a competition we just lose weight in the way that works for us. and do what's best for us and our bodies.

OP posts:
Grumpyrager · 11/09/2025 13:19

Could you meet her on a morning with no food involved?
otherwise you should consider stepping back

MounjaroBore · 11/09/2025 13:20

Grumpyrager · 11/09/2025 13:19

Could you meet her on a morning with no food involved?
otherwise you should consider stepping back

I'm gonna have to start going to things with her that don't involve eating maybe coffees.

OP posts:
SilenceInside · 11/09/2025 13:20

She sounds odd. Presumably she's been like this in other aspects of her life which haven't affected you directly before so it hasn't been a problem in your friendship? Or is this a recent change??

I would refuse to meet up if it involves a meal out. I wouldn't respond to questions about what or how much you're eating. If you want to, you could tell her that you find the constant talk of weight loss and the weight loss injections to be boring and a little obsessive, and you'd like her to stop doing that around you. If she's actually a good friend, she might realise what she's doing and tone it down.

carmak · 11/09/2025 13:22

If I went on a diet at work, the only other overweight woman would bring in a bar of chocolate for me. Doesn't take much to work that one out.

TheChosenTwo · 11/09/2025 13:22

Agree with the others, next time there’s a meet up suggested and you actually do want to spend your spare time in her company suggest something that doesn’t involve food.

I’ve been on MJ for a year and have never behaved so oddly. I have been out for meals throughout and just ordered a smaller plate of something and eaten what I could and left the rest. I also never ever comment on anyone else’s body nor do I like people commenting on mine!

MounjaroBore · 11/09/2025 13:22

This is a recent thing because i've never seen her on the weight loss injections before.

Before she went on them, she mentioned that she'd like to lose some.Weight for health reasons, but largely she didn't say anything about it. I never noticed what she was eating or not eating because it wasn't a thing.

Come to think of it, she chose this particular restaurant which I didn't really want to go to purely because they will box up your left overs. She literally ate a few mouthfuls of it and ask them to box it up.

I actually felt embarrassed eating most of my food. And it was a normal amount of food.It wasn't a huge portion.

OP posts:
Suednymph · 11/09/2025 13:22

Suggest walks on the beach or in a park or something. Tell her that spurned on by her very quick and recent weightloss you have decided to trim down a pound or two yourself and are looking forward to healthy walks instead of going for meals. Might shut her up.

MounjaroBore · 11/09/2025 13:23

Suednymph · 11/09/2025 13:22

Suggest walks on the beach or in a park or something. Tell her that spurned on by her very quick and recent weightloss you have decided to trim down a pound or two yourself and are looking forward to healthy walks instead of going for meals. Might shut her up.

Oh I forgot that part of it.She keeps telling me how many kilometres she's walked per day on the treadmill to assist her weight loss.But she can't exercise too hard because of the reduction in her food intake, she actually finds she's a lot weaker and can't exercise much.

OP posts:
Orangesandlemons77 · 11/09/2025 13:23

I have this with my MIL. Who is not on WLI, but has an eating disorder. Is it possible your friend might be developing one I wonder?

She doesn't sound very supportive. I'm on mounjaro myself and have recommended it to friends, rather than saying they don't need it etc.

Ineedanewsofa · 11/09/2025 13:24

The MJ/weightloss is a red herring IMO, she sounds like she’s finally (in her mind) found something she’s ‘better’ than you at and is using every opportunity to lord it over you which is horrible.
If you both had the same hobby she’d probably be boasting about her wins, if you both had babies she’d be always wanging on about how advanced and amazing her child is, etc…
Honestly she’s not really a friend, she’s a passive aggressive knob

Suednymph · 11/09/2025 13:25

@MounjaroBore honestly she sounds like shes possessed. Keep away from her till she gets a new topic of conversation.

Bliss1985 · 11/09/2025 13:26

“Oh sally, every time you mention the jab/how little you want to eat it makes me a step closer to signing up myself”,
that might shut her up, she wants to ‘win’ 🤮

Sunnyscribe · 11/09/2025 13:26

pikkumyy77 · 11/09/2025 13:13

She means to embarrass you. She wants to put you into a competition that you lose without risking your joining the competition and “winning.” She isn’t friends with you because she likes and supports you. She is constructing a world in which you are cast as her ugly wingman at the bar so she looks better.

This. I think she's really enjoying being able to compare herself to you and "come off better" in comparison, which by the way she definitely isn't coming off better, she sounds intolerable, very self absorbed and a crap friend.