I’ve got the Ick and I don’t want to fix it

[theickisrealurgh]

It’s finally happened, my partner has given me the biggest ick that I just don’t want to be with him anymore. The sheer thought of being with him for much longer fills me with dread.

He’s paying for his daughter to have breast implants, she’s 19. I think it’s weird, and it’s made me feel sick. It’s want she wants and I get that, but something about it just doesn’t sit right with me. It might be normal to some and if it was anything else I wouldn’t be bothered but I can’t shift this feeling of discomfort. She’s a B cup.

I get on with his daughter very well, never had an issue so it’s not that. Luckily we don’t live together but we have been together for 10 years.

I don’t know how to get out of this

@MrDobbs I have no idea how this thread became a thread about my apparent benefit fraud 😂

Are you ok? You seem weirdly hostile and coming up with very strange comments

Anyway...back to your original issue, how are you going to move forward with this?

In Korea, facial cosmetic surgery is often a graduation present from parents. (Korea is more about facial enhancements, Brazil more about the body)

What benefit you peculiar person

I’m thinking of just being somewhat truthfully, we’ve grown apart, both want different things, lives going in different directions? But I want to remain friendly for the sake of dd

ok, op
if you are sure they don't have psychological incest - I don't believe this....there are many men on here who parents daughters only !!!! , are you booting him and when

@bumbalooThank you for defending me, some people on this app are so strange

@BathingforestI’m going to speak to him on Thursday, on neutral ground and just get it over with

My mum told me mine looked like oranges in socks and gave me 1000k towards them - 2500 pound at the time. If hes making his daughter happy its really none of your buisness

Sounds like a plan.

But are you saying he wants her to look more sexual?? Is it because it’s her breasts specifically?

I had a tummy tuck a few years ago; if my dad had paid for it to improve my mental health (he didn’t but it massively improved my mental health) would you think that was weird?

You’re projecting sexual feelings onto something that I doubt has that motivation.

Did you read how the dad described his daughter's medical appointment?

Talking about anyone playing with his daughter's "titties" like that, honestly I'd dump him on the spot. That text is vile. I don't like to date 13 year old boys who'd say things like that, nevermind someone talking that way about their child 🤢

The fact he's paying his daughter to have a breast procedure wouldn't bother me personally, if he was more mature and she was making an informed decision. I'd have to think about it. She could just get a loan to get one done and I wouldn't want my daughter getting into debt if we could avoid it, if it's what she really wanted. I don't have an adult child so haven't come up against this yet, thankfully.

But that text? BYE.

Lovely words about her❤️ it’s a shame she can’t see it!

I guess for you this is just the last straw then really . On its own, you might not have been too bothered but you sound like you’re just at the limit. Good luck with it all , I hope it all goes smoothly x

Ew ! Saw this after I commented! That’s horrible, I would absolutely get the ick from this! Who talks about their daughter like that !

OP - you could pave the way now. Perhaps a text ahead of your chat? Something like

"I know I said I had the 'ick, but that last comment has genuinely given me pause for thought. I'm sorry if that seems over the top to you, but I thought you should know how I am feeling. I was already a bit uncomfortable around the whole idea of a dad paying for a daughter to have bigger boobs, and your comment has sort of compounded it and I am not sure I can get passed it. I really don't want to fight but we do need to talk".

Or something like that?

I know you're trying to be helpful, @Piknik , but I don't think the OP should apologise. She's not in the wrong here. You're right about the DH comment, that's the issue.

That text would kill the relationship stone dead for me as well. All 10 years of it. Fuck that right off. What a rotter.

And please don’t be led into composing any walking-on-eggshells over explainey messages to soften the blow for him either.
You find him grim/turns out he is not the guy for you/it’s over boom.

Whilst it’s not something I would do - I can see why a parent might pay for it if it was something that was important for the daughter. But that comment would be too much for me. Absolutely gross and immature way to talk about his daughter or any woman having a medical consult.

Yes, it's because it's her breasts specifically, but also because OP's DP messaged her "Shes just got the dr playing around with her titties" - that's beyond ick-inducing! He's in his mid-forties FGS. Any normal, mature man would have messaged 'The Dr's examining her (breasts) now'. He made it "sexual" with his repulsive teenage language, not OP.
I have no doubt that OP wouldn't be concerned if her DP was paying for a tummy-tuck for his daughter because she has mental health issues in relation to her tummy.

What an odd thing. In my opinion I do not think I could ever get the ick from my significant other. But that is so weird. I do think he can do what he wants on the other hand! I am very much in the middle of this situation.

I wouldn’t normally see the issue, but going to the consultation with her and talking about the dr and titties just 🤢

Really? What benefits do you think two employed homeowners would be entitled to exactly? Enlighten us. 🙄

She was clearly projecting, hopefully now put the wine down!