is she wrong

[prettyfly1]

ok - i am doing this for a friend who is in a bit of a muddle - and yes it really is for a friend.

She has been seeing a man for about 8 months who was married. seperated when they started seeing each other. he wont divorce his wife - alarm bells there. he wont tell her he is seeing her. alarm bells again but the situation is slightly complicated so she let it drop. he spends time with his wife as friends, which my friend has always been cool with as she feels it is best for their children if they get on. He went out with them on sunday night for his ex wifes sons birthday, told her he would be ignoring her for the night and then got drunk and spent the night with her. he was still incommunicado monday afternoon at which point she freaked. she has just had enough. He finally responded tuesday afternoon to tell her he slept in the boys room on sunday and ignored her on monday night as she was overreacting.

now if it were me i would have gone nuts. he has a history of cheating and has been caught lying to her a few times. what would you say.

and do you know what really fecks me off about myself and this is really really bad. i was supposed to go to x factor last week. to try out. i was a singer for years and its still a bit of a dream. i didnt go and told him it was cause it would affect work. the truth is i didnt go because i was worried that it would put HIM in an awkward position if i got through and I didnt want him to have horrible stories about him coming out. WHHHYYYYYYYWHHYYYYYWHYYYYYWHYYYYY. I am so going to go to one of the other auditions next weekend. DOOR MAT MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh my days. totally surprised myself tonight. my friend next door has had a hard time as well- total coincidence but she knocked on my door this affie to ask if i wanted to come to a bbq at hers. bbq stopped at9.00 and she came over here and i have had the best night in ages. not laughed so much in a really long time. because we both have shit bag exs we have decided to swap mobiles to stop each other being tempted to do something silly and she knew me pre mr n so she reminded me of things even i forgot. like the fact that mr n did not cheat on his wife after a really big argument. mr n arranged to meet me the afternoon before said argument and argument was about him going out. mr n also likes to tell everyone i am obsessed. mr n only came back into my life in september of last year. he found me through the electoral register in feb last year and was checking my myspace pages for months beforehand to see if i was still single or not. those of you who told me to run were right. mr n called me three weeks and three days before he got married - despite the fact that i had been living in devon with someone else for two years to ask what i was doing - i ignored it at the time. my friend tonight reminded me of this. he has always and will always make it out to be me. i had a nice life and will again and never ever looked for him - it was the other way round and now i have learned to shut the door. i feel so much better. Nothing like a bloody good female friend in a crisis. !!!!

Maybe you need to promise yourself not to post any more- you do seem obsessed with this, and the more you post, IMO, the more it keeps it in the forefront of your mind.

lol- girl next door - i think youll find it was more a massive emotional outpouring while i dealt with it - my friends in r l would only say i told you so. Kind of like therapy - just pour it all out where people dont know me and apparently wont judge [sceptical]and its safe to do so. i do need to promise myself not to write when drunk though and actually i had already decided my last post was going to be on this subject.

mac i concede defeat. the dating thing was a knee jerk reaction and tit for tat. which i would like to be better than. I have taken myself off the sites and will be going out this morning to buy some new furniture for the house i will be buying this week. then i am going to go out with my son and tomorrow i am going to go back to working 60 hour weeks to pay for it, spend my time with my lovely fab friends and beautiful boy and walk away from this whole sordid little mess with my only real regret being that i didnt do it sooner.

thanks for the supportive posts those that have stepped in to do so. mac eve etc. I really really needed that help this weekend and i needed to just pour it out until there was nothing left. You are lovely women and i wish you the very best of luck.

and girl next door - it took 18 hours and copious amounts of wine outpouring for me to deal with 10 years of a nightmare relationship and be ready to just leave it behind. with the greatest respect thats not obsessive love. its human. skanky mistress or not i loved him and it hurt. and as i have learned the hard way this weekend there but for the grace of god go i. eight months ago i gave my friends no time when they broke up with their partners to shut up about it, told them to suck it up and get on with it and just move on. I will never ever be that judgemental again. point over.