Have you ever been surprised when you met someone’s spouse/DP?

[littlemissworry97]

As in they didn’t look or act how you expected them to, or they completely weren’t the type you expected?

Boris Johnson?

😂😂😂😂 NO! But maybe Bozza is a great lover. There has to be something!

Agreed.

Lucky for me I’m married to a woman 🙌🏻

So did you actually fancy him at any point? Did his intelligence and the physical relationship make him seem handsome?😅

I don't think anyone should be extrapolating from this thread that they themselves are unattractive. It's just people sharing anecdotes of couples who've surprised them. It can't be taken as a reflection on how any individual reading it looks.

Probably because it suggests they have a strong personal connection - shared values, interests/hobbies in common, or just getting along really well.

I disagree. A lid for every pot. And often people are the worst judges of their own attractiveness! Leonard Cohen had a song based on a real encounter with Janis Joplin, where she says to him, "Well, never mind. We are ugly but we have the music."

Both utterly gorgeous IMO.

Whereas Piers Morgan always seemed quite pleased with own stupid face which I always wanted to introduce to a brick at speed. See also: Boris Johnson.

Edit: forgot to quote whom I was disagreeing with, but it was someone who said there are generally agreed attractive and unattractive people as though it were in any way objective.

No, nothing made him seem handsome!

Fancy him - well, yes. You don't need a man to be handsome when he can give your orgasms that actually go on for too long! (He stopped when asked to, never before.) I'm sure his high-quality wife is a very happy woman.

I also found this troubling as yesterday I took a selfie of myself and DH where he looked like a golden god and I looked like a potato!

Men are shallow fuckers. Unless he's a visa scamster or something then he wouldn't have married you if he didn't fancy you!

I thought this would make a good prompt for Designer .. 😏

I know it's not totally objective, but come on, there are some more popularly held opinions/tastes than others. Most people wouldn't, for example, find Leonard Cohen very attractive. Same as many people wouldn't think (and sorry to have to mention this name again!!) Paula Vennells was very pretty.

I'm also not talking about people's self perception of their attractiveness, but just how many others see them.

I am sure you do/did not look like a potato! A photo isn't reality, it's just a 2D image. The camera does lie - it can distort us, for better or for worse.

I'm not talking about my own relationship....Me and my boyfriend were very much an instant attraction.

Not every man marries a woman he's absolutely head over heels smitten with. You just have to look around at couples; not all men are married to a woman who they would have said was their pin up ideal type. Ditto for women.

Lots of people used to just marry the first person they started going out with. Entirely possible that they 'grew on' each other over time.

I remember a MN thread years ago where several posters said they would to a photo of the young Joseph Stalin. Not my cup of tea at all! Whereas Leonard? I'd join the queue if he had a kissing booth, 100%.

Pictured: Stalin

@JackGrealishsBobbySocks I agree Stalin was handsome but I wouldn't because of who he was/his actions!! Don't find Leonard Cohen attractive but do respect his talent.

I've just spent a horrible five minutes googling pictures of Leonard Cohen 😀. I do think he falls into the objectively handsome category (and fully knew it). Whether you fancy/are attracted to him is all about that x factor but he was definitely handsome.

It was such a huge part of my culture and upbringing to be catty about other woman’s looks, I definitely had a sort of competitive thought process of, ‘I have low self esteem about my looks, but at least I don’t have the physical feature that SHE has’. Instead, I now try really hard to not let my brain even think negatively about another woman’s physical features. It’s nasty, shallow, and brings nothing of any value to the table. It’s amazing how many good qualities shine through when you change your focus. I’m much happier in my own skin now too.

OP, all you’re doing is slating a woman you’ve just met, calling her skinny, haggard, and goofy faced. It’s just unpleasant.

It’s simple really, disrespectful & harmful behaviour thrives when it’s not challenged. By myself and many many other posters calling you out you managed to change your tact within this thread in a way that reflected our views of what you have written. And although you have not been able to directly acknowledge or accept what myself and others have pointed out to you (instead deflecting and excusing your words) back tracking in the way that you have is an admission in itself. So that’s progress I suppose.

Gosh. I don't even know where to start with this comment! 😱

Hubba hubba.

Yes, to me personally, Leonard Cohen is very physically attractive!
I think this is a cruel thread, sparked out of jealousy.
If you completely ignore the personality…
Superficially, we all have different tastes: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
For example, I worked as a model, all through my twenties, however, I kind of love a bit of a ‘beer belly’ (it makes for better cuddles!). I also LOVE beards, which lots of women hate (and yes, I do get beard-rash after kissing but I can live with that!)

I imagined him differently to those photos.

@OpheliaHamlet True that tastes vary but not everyone marries what they originally thought was their ideal type.

The husband in the anecdote I shared frequently eyes up women who look nothing like his wife…🤷‍♀️

The original subject was about people being shocked by others spouses. People are shocked when they see us together. Totally different abet similar to the TikTok couple with the very handsome husband with his pretty but shorter overweight wife. My husband has been hit on by women while I’m standing there. Don’t get me wrong he doesn’t tolerate such disrespect. But it happens and people judge and they are nearly always surprised when they meet me.