Is my partner still stuck on his ex

[Zoezoe25]

I've met my partner in October last year, he cheated (I didn't know) on his then partner and 5 year old son at the time, she found out about us in November he said, then we went official in December. They were together 6 years, and from he told me the relationship was toxic. However I do not condone the cheating, but I do love him and believe he will not do that to me, we have an amazing relationship.
He currently lives with me and my 2 DDs, we are incredibly happy together, there are a few small issues but I'm sure we can pull through.

The issue is this
His ex refuses to communicate with him on anything other than email.
I helped him get set up on an email address and show him how to use email.
His ex doesn't really bother him TBF only for money and contact, she has a bf as far I as know.
He asked to use my phone the other day and logged into his email account as his phone has died, but forgot to log out.
Last night I had a meal out with family and the Uber home was over a 30 min drive back home so I went on my phone emails and what I came across is an email from this ex on Sunday.
He's was lying to her, told her a month ago that I was pregnant, then told her a week ago we was having a boy, and then told his son twice he was having a brother, his ex was on the call.
He told her the truth on Saturday, she obviously went mad from her email in regards to him lying to their son on one occasion.

He was asleep when I got home, but I can't help but think he must still love her, or else why would he lie to her about this, why wind her up for some long.
I'm really confused and worried - should I confront him?

Indeed. As the old saying goes "There are none so blind as those who will not see. The most deluded people are those who choose to ignore what they already know."

No one is perfect, however there has to be a standard that you set yourself in life, how bad was your ex that this man seems to be "the one'

He shit all over his son and ex, and yet you move him in weeks/months after his betrayal (which you claim you had no knowledge of, find that hard to believe) and then join in with the smear campaign! Do you not see what he is doing here? He's got you right where he wants you.
If he was not living with you, where would he reside? I'm guessing sofa surfing or back with his mother.
Right now, you are good as you are meeting all his needs
No nagging
No questions
Sex on demand
Food on table
Etc etc
9 months is nothing in a relationship, you are still in the honeymoon period, you barely know each other and there's 3 children in the mix, I doubt you get much time to "yourselves"

The ex is entitled to loose her shit, I would too - does your ex pay for his DD? How would you feel if your ex didn't pay a penny but shacked up with another woman, and ensured her household was covered financially while ignoring your pleas for help? And twice a month, with you all in tow? Really, c'mon you don't see why she would have had an issue with that?

Have some fucking compassion, you really do get everything you deserve, I just hope your DD have good family around them to pick up the pieces when it's your TURN to be betrayed. Because it WILL happen.

Omg is this a wind up….

I hope so, it all beggars belief

This. Please, please let me meet such a scumbag I can obsess about over the internet!

extra points if he has a weed habit and a neck tattoo….

@Lolo2000 yes he would be living with his father in Devon, and what is the issue there?

He isn't perfect at all, and my ex was and still is a good man, he has a partner has moved on, I'm happy for him I don't have an issue with my 2 girls spending time with his partner at all so I don't see why she should have an issue with us all spending time together, after all I will be in her son's life for a long time.
I get everyone's message. Stop with the negative posts I will deal with what you all expect to happen if it ever does, so please don't wish bad energy/thoughts my way.
Thank you and goodnight

Wow. He's a cheater, a terrible father and didn't know how to use email? Does he even work if he didn't have an email address?

And he was moved in with two young, non-related girls in a few months.

This is so SO messed up.

And I say this as a non-middle-aged woman who's younger than you OP.

It must be.

Honestly op what you've both done to his ex is appalling, don't drag your kids into your poor moral code, it must be humiliating for them not to mention dangerous.

It was far too soon to allow another man in your home even if you're lying about the duration you have known him.

Poor children, I bet friends and family have got their beady on you, and probably the school if there is talk at the gates about you.
These things don't go unoticed and all you care about is if he still loves his ex.

Terrible.

Yes how dare everyone doubt love’s young dream over here! With two such mature, intelligent, classy people meeting under the perfect circumstances what in the Jeremy Kyle could ever go wrong?! Nothing for Social Services to see here at all, everyone is super smart and acting in the children’s best interest…

Op, I can see that some of the posts on here are very mean, but this is because we are all beyond exasperated that you are unable to see the truth. They say that ‘love is blind’ and it’s so true, when we’re full of hormones we are simply unable to apply common sense and see the truth. I’m sure this has happened to you before, you met a man, you were so certain he was great and yet he turned out to be a dick! I know this has happened to me many times and every time I thought i’d be wiser next time but, when my brain was full of hormones I couldn’t be wiser.

I’m not saying he is a ‘bad’ guy, few people are truly bad. He may not be malicious but he is an idiot, and you should aim higher than that! Please allow yourself to consider that you may actually be blinded to his true character. Can you imagine yourself lying to your children, telling them that they’re going to have a little brother or sister and seeing them get excited whilst you knew that this was not true and that they’d be disappointed when you told them the truth? Or could you imagine your children being away from you and in need of food/clothes etc but you refusing to pay for these things (for whatever reason)? This is what your boyfriend is doing!! Please please have a think about what that says about him as a person

'Don't say such nasty things'. Meanwhile you're out here hating a woman that's been left holding the baby with no support and calling her batshit, and worrying more about whether he still fancies her rather than what kind of man this makes him.

this has to be fake otherwise it’s really disturbing. The worst part has to be lying to a 5 year old telling them they are getting a new brother. What kind of a grown adult would do this to a child ? There is simply no excuse for that level of pathetic behaviour. Honestly I would be so concerned for those 2 girls if this is real.

One thing I have to say, credit where it's due, his stbxw refused to communicate except via email probably knowing he had no clue how to email. Love that for her

No man falls in love quicker than one about to be homeless

This has to be a reverse surely

We’re all jealous of her too 🙄

Sorry to burst your bubble but you're also middle aged. As for jealous, I'm struggling to think what of.
I have been happily married to my first love for thirty year. No baggage, no mortgage, retired in my forties, no blended family, lies or cheating, just three happy well adjusted succesful adult DC. I do have a life limiting condition but I'd still choose my life over yours, the one you're inflicting on your DDs and you're considering bringing a baby into this shitshow! It'll be you being called batshit for expecting that prince amongst men to support his DC.
You keep consolling yourself with the delusional thinking and do come back in thirty years to let us know how you're getting on. Actually, don't bother, I'll be long gone but it doesn't take a genius to know how this ends...

So why didn't he move to Devon?
I'm not saying you can't spend time with his son HOWEVER if he only sees his child twice a month and the "family" all rocks up, when does this little boy get to spend time with him 1on1.
Dad left and pretty much moved in with a new family the next day in his eyes!

As for lying about a pregnancy, I remember a school friend doing that at 15 to keep a boy she liked - we all thought she was a bunny boiler. I've never heard of a man doing that, let alone tell his DS that he was going to have a brother. What a fucking crazy man, is he alright? Seriously?

Don't worry about if he still loves his ex - that's not the issue here.
The man is a dick end of.
I'm pretty sure you will be pregnant by the end of the year, in a bid to keep him.
Poor kids!

Spot on.

You have no idea whatsoever that your children are safe.

He’s a terrible man. You are your own worst enemy. This is doomed but I’m afraid you are beyond help.

Sadly true