A thread for FwB survivors (perhaps a little tongue in cheek) Part 2

[Clytemnestra21]

Hi all 👋
New thread to continue the old one for those of who still take part. Hope this works and everyone can see it?

Yep it does start again after the 4th or 5th time of him telling me it’s done

Good. Just remember you don’t owe him exclusivity if he won’t match your energy.

@Clytemnestra21 Don’t let this drift back to what has made you unhappy in the past. If he’s not going to grow up even now it’s really time to call it. I do think he likes you but there’s a point where that’s not enough and I really think that’s where you’re getting to. You want a proper relationship and you DESERVE a proper relationship.

Thanks @mummypigoink saw him and it was lovely. I’ve totally lost my head. But I don’t think the situation as it would need to for my needs to be met.

I think with mine it’s the whole bad boy thing. And the adrenaline when you get a text/go to see them etc. But I’m learning though although he might like me, it’s never gonna be enough for a relationship for him

It’s hard. Was it lovely enough?

from what you’ve said about him I really don’t think he likes you. Sorry

If you need to have a proper chat it needs to be in public over a coffee or something otherwise hormones and lust take over and everything is (temporarily) forgotten- I’ve learned that the hard way!

Can I ask why x

@ThatRubyLion I think therapy has been mentioned as being something you should explore. It is quite concerning that you need to ask why. I feel very sorry for you

I do know why really, I know he’s dropped me 4 or 5 times etc etc, I do get it I just wanted to hear someone else’s perspective xx

I agree. He’s clearly very toxic and PP is unable to walk away for some reason, despite being in a short-term fling with him.

@mummypigoinklovely enough for now. But we spent a lot of time together including some out in the world. Made me realise that skipping the dating before all the Intimacy over such a long time meant we haven’t had the same opportunity to explore whether we’re truly compatible in terms of interests and values.

Oh, that’s a bit of a twist. How so if you don’t mind me asking?

It’s hard to summarise. But little things annd big things - like about what we think constitutes a good date. Attitudes to food and spending, phone etiquette. I can’t imagine how we’d go down with one another’s friends and family. Obviously that doesn’t matter if we just see each other intimately. But if we were to blend, meet each other’s children etc it becomes bigger doesn’t it?

I met a bloke recently who is a really nice guy. But what I would consider a perfectly normal lunch out he viewed as a huge extravagance. Foods I think are normal he views as out there. So yeah, I can see how that would have you wondering how it would work in reality.

I’m intrigued. French cheese? Mango? Pomegranate? Escargot? Quail eggs?

Hard to say if it’s worth the upset! We are all different.

Used to have various FWB when I was younger - then found my first real boyfriend and realised what mutual love and trust was all about.

I don’t regret my various life experiences - but I think they taught me some good lessons about what’s really important and about my own personality.

how old are you ruby?

43 x

Basically anything more than a Greggs or a meat and two veg meal was out there. A plain eater as my gran would have described it.

Im not a gourmand, but I do like eating different things in nice places.

😂 He would get on with my 6yo nephew, for whom lasagna is a step too far into “exotic” territory!

That’s really interesting. Has it changed your feelings for him at all? Maybe you need to get back on OLD!

@Moresunlessraini don’t feel any less affection or attraction for him, but i feel a bit despondent again after having felt really elated over the last few weeks. It takes the shine off the prospect of building a future together. I think I may have to make a decision - again!

Id love a FWB lol