Long post, thank you for reading.
The background:
I am the eldest of 3, the only girl. Also an army brat, childhood was characterised by toxic masculinity, in that my Dad took the boys fishing/football clubs etc. Spent no time with me. I guess he thought my place was with mum. However, I never felt loved by her. I’d go as far as to say she was emotionally abusive. Very lonely childhood.
Significant incident:
My brother & his partner had a child. They texted Dad the details of the christening. He forwarded this on to my other brother but not to me. Lots of conversations etc occurred about it, none included me. Long story short, they forgot to invite me. I reacted with upset, and rather than apologise, I was made out to be the villain, they removed me from their social media, and I’ve seen this child less than 10 times (he’s now 8yrs). Dad never intervened or stood up for me.
Decision made by me:
I was very ill this year and was in hospital and reflected. Came to the conclusion that 8 yrs was a long time to treat someone badly. Told Dad I was having nothing more to do with my brothers. (Not on a heated argument, was done in a gentle way when I got home from hospital). You should also know Dad lives two doors down from me. They drive past my house every week, never let me know they’re at Dads, call into mine, or enquire about my children. I buy the child birthday & Christmas presents anyway.
Today:
Nephews Holy Communion. Dad sent me a pic, and it triggered something. Told him to stop sending pictures of the child coz it hurts. Also hurts that he never misses this child’s school events, but never once attended any of my children’s things. Reminded him he forgot my child’s birthday; also that when my son passed his driving test he bought him a card, whereas he bought my niece a car.
Dads response:
you are no longer part of this family. I hope you are happy. Do not contact me again.
What do I do now?