In what circumstances does a father get full custody of his child?

[athenaswrath]

Hi,

I was just wanting to know the answer to this question, the father of my child who is a complete narcissist and bully has stated to the judge yesterday that he going for full custody of our child after trying to prove I was mentally unstable which didn’t work and I was granted permission to take our daughter abroad. He is using everything he can which is very little to try and make my life as difficult as possible. I’ve got another court case after my holiday and he has stated he wants her full time or if not full time 50/50 (make up your mind)

This bloke has put me through hell the last 2 years and he’s really affected me mentally. As you can imagine trying to co parent with a narcissist is unbelievably hard.

He is also going to use my eldest son as a means of getting her too he has said she is unsafe round him and he worries about her round him because my eldest has a diagnosis of ADHD and is being assessed for ASD he has in the past been verbally aggressive and has put holes in my walls from his outbursts, he did two years ago accidentally break his younger brothers arm when play fighting but social come round and that case was closed. He is not a threat to our daughter he absolutely adores her but this is one of the things he will use in court. He has tried to make me look mental and like I am unstable too because I suffer with depression and anxiety.

I know I have a huge battle coming up and need to prepare for the vicious lies he’s going to attack me with. I just need some advice if possible please.

The one I know, he had the money to fight it in court and she didn’t. He painted her as a nut job and turned the DC against her. I’ve only heard her side of the story, but it seems to fit what I see.

My son has full custody of his teenage daughter. The mum has documented drug and alcohol issues and mental health problems. She sent abusive texts to her daughter threatening suicide and blaming her daughter for driving her to it. My son kept the texts as evidence. There are many other incidents although the mother was never physically violent towards her daughter. The mum still will not accept any blame for her actions and took my son to court twice . She now has a barring order (I can't remember the correct term) preventing her from going back to the court. Cafcass were fully involved and were very supportive of my son It's all been an absolute nightmare and the stress has greatly affected my son. My granddaughter seems ok but who knows how this will affect her going forward. She sees her mum once a week at my sons discretion but mum and her family are still blaming my son and doing their utmost to cause a wedge between father and daughter. They don't care how it affects the child.

Hi! it went well the judge was a woman in the end and saw right through his BS! Where as it was men last time. I got what I wanted and he didn’t have a say to be honest. Everything has finally settled but every now and then he will make a comment or a dig and try and start a row to which I just ignore. He has tried to control and manipulate what the agreement is but I have stuck to my guns with it.

100% this is what he did. Even now he will say I’m bipolar (I have never been diagnosed with it either)

Well done - it can be very stressful and daunting feeling like you have to prove you aren't mad, but the Courts have honestly seen it all before and can see when a mother has cared for her kids and done things just to keep the peace with an abusive partner. It sounds like you have had a really rough ride, so I agree finding someone else is unlikely to be your priority right now. Relax with him out of your hair and enjoy the kids.

Well he has to prove that irrefutably and they do not give people full custody except in very extenuating circumstances such as my first husband who was a paranoid schizophrenic who refused to take his medication and lived in absolute filth, in that case I got full custody but we had to get medical reports, an independent psychiatrist etc etc. It wasn't automatic. They decided he was too dangerous even to see DS under supervision.
Your ex is bullshitting you.

No proof no custody. They don't just take anybody's word for it. It has to be proven. They are more likely to take any custody away from him for parental alienation.

100% I’m quite happy being on my own, have been nearly 3 years now and I do not plan on meeting anyone else.