My DH wants me to share my location with him

[1457bloom]

Do you think this is a red flag? I feel it’s an invasion of my privacy.

If you don't want to then don't. It really depends on how you feel about it.

We have a family circle on life360, but we're all comfortable with being able to see where someone is. we find it useful when needed.

If you're not comfortable with it then who gives a toss if he gets upset?

He has always been a little jealous which I find quite endearing. Maybe if he knows where I am it will stop him worrying and keep his jealousy at bay.

My wife and I share permanently because that is what she wants and doesn’t have to worry where I am. I use it occasionally to judge when she will be home. It’s not a big deal for us.

Yep, that'll work

If he is going to share his location with you then I wouldn't see a problem with it. We don't do this but each to their own.

As a side note though, about 15 years ago my sister's long term ex boyfriend was always calling her "Where are you?" "When will you be home?" Before these tracking apps existed.
Turned out he was cheating on her and the OW was coming round to their house while she was out, so he wanted to check my sister wouldn't arrive home unexpectedly.

I hadn’t considered that but I can’t imagine my DH would be unfaithful.

We have life 360. My wife’s suggestion, only because we both travel for work, but can be on calls so don’t tell each other straight away when we’ve left. We can also work out who needs to be back for picking daughter up as needed if other is delayed on the train etc

With all due respect it really annoys me when people romanticise jealousy. Not having a go at you OP because I was previously the same. My ex showed small signs of jealousy if anyone even spoke to me in a pub/club etc which I initially thought was cute but then v slowly it built up into him spying on the whereabouts of my car (we weren’t living together) and escalated into him making totally unsupported claims of cheating that’s how much his paranoia and jealousy grew. I remember a friend saying she thought it’d be great to have a guy so jealous and I told her she’s cluelsss because in the real world it’s a sign of toxic insecurity. Personally to me someone wanting the other to share their location without offering the same first considering it’s their idea is a manipulative sign of control not care.

I'm with others. How will him knowing your location 'keep you safe'?

Unless of course he means keeping you safe from falling over and impaling yourself on another man's penis.

Your updates are very concerning, classic abuser mindset. Stay safe. The face you're posting here means that deep down you know something's not right.

We share locations for practical purposes. No worries about cheating or stalking or jealousy here though. In your circumstances, I would say no, especially if he doesn't want to share his location with you.

I don't do it and never will as it's just not something that I feel necessary or wish to do.
My son (adult) seems to be able to tell where all his friends and girlfriend are but I think that's from Snapchat. It's just a normal thing to him, but not to me. I don't worry if I don't know where someone is, under normal circumstances.

This may be offensive to some but I find it creepy and weird people need and want to share locations when they are in a couple. If you want to know when they are going to be home, get them to text you before they leave with an approx time of arrival.

I am an autonomous adult and if I want to pop out, or be home late then I don't have to answer to anyone. I'll text to say that to a potential partner if they were expecting me but I wouldn't share my location so they can track me. It's an invasion of privacy and I would never ask if of another adult.

Just say no OP and if he gets mad then you leave as it's for controlling purposes not protective.

We both do this. It’s quite handy sometimes. I’d only agree op, if it’s reciprocated.

I wouldn’t even track teenage DD, let alone my DH - and I would say no if he asked to track me (which he wouldn’t). If I’m late at work or the Tube is a mess, I ring or text. I very rarely do long car journeys, though - I can’t see why people might occasionally want it for that. In your case this looks like a red flag, don’t agree to it.

Even if it was reciprocated, if her DP was using it for controlling purposes and jealousy as OP describes then it still wouldn't be okay, would it?

I wouldn't want this, but only you can decide. Once done it would be difficult to.go back on it i.think. If I was asked shall we share our location I.still think I'd be reluctant.

If others want to do it, that's their business but you are entitled to your privacy. Don't squash your own feelings about it. I wouldn't share my location either except under specific circumstances.

Obvs it wouldn’t be ok if the bloke is controlling and jealous and that’s the main reason for him suggesting this. If that’s the case the op has bigger problems than agreeing to sharing location..

If he's not doing anything dodgy himself then he'll be okay with sharing his own location with you. Not saying he is up to anything but men can be sneaky.

Absolutely not. I think its extremely controlling.

It seems that the consensus is that I shouldn’t share my location with him. I will have a chat with him and say it isn’t really necessary as if I am running late I will just send a text as I have always done. Hopefully he will be fine with that. Thanks for everyone’s comments.

It really won't.

If you feed the jealousy monster, it gets bigger.

And imagine you go off your normal routine or a different route, or stop somewhere lknger than expected, or there's a glitch with the application, and you have to explain what you were doing.

Never pander to jealousy by giving up freedoms or privacy.

Jealousy is his issue to deal with, not yours to manage. He needs to learn to sit with uncomfortable feelings and trust you, not try to police and track you.

It wouldn’t even enter my head to request this from my partner.

I absolutely would not. My late husband's was the most decent of people, not a hint of control or jealousy, so no red flag at all. And I get that some families are perfectly comfortable with it.

But I love my independence and I love my privacy. I find the idea of anyone I know being able to check in to see where I am, without my knowledge, as creepy as fuck. There's no way in the world that I would agree to it.