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Original poster

Husbands pitbull becoming snappy in old age, and I’m pregnant

367 replies

Oliveover28 · 10/04/2025 22:17

It took me two years to convince my now husband to keep his pitbull dog with his mum for me to move into his house with my two small dogs. The reason for me not wanting my two dogs around his dog is his dog previously attacked and killed his mums small dog. Apparently he done this because the smaller dog kept snapping at him and the family seem to think it’s justified? Bear in mind this was a teacup senior dog. Awful.

anyway the agreement was the pitbull can come back once we buy a bigger house as I pushed for the can’t separate 3 dogs in a small house excuse. Anyway we are looking to buy a house this year, and husband is saying why wouldn’t his dog come back to live in the house he buys. Well, lately the dog has been snapping at people a little more, husband says oh it’s old age.

problem is, I’m now pregnant. I feel extremely uncomfortable around this dog, this dog around my dogs and now this dog around a defenseless baby? He says we will keep them separate, but that sounds like hell having a new born, and 3 dogs to keep separate whilst he’s at work all day. He said sometimes he will take him to work, and I could probably push for only having the dog at home on the weekends. But still, I just don’t know if I’ll be able to relax in my own home and I want to be in the best mindset possible to raise my first child. I want to feel relaxed at an already stressful time.

AIBU? Any suggestions on what to say to my husband as to why I don’t want his dog coming back. He is saying oh he only snaps at people he doesn’t know, not his own family. I will also add the dog only snaps at weak people (a senior with cancer, and a friend with MS) it’s like they can sense weakness. He fully believes this dog is going to see our baby as his family, but this dog is already ten years old.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
JoyousEagle · 10/04/2025 22:27

Admittedly, I’m not a dog person. But I would move out before having my baby around a dog that has previously killed another dog, and frequently snaps at people.

summerlovingvibes · 10/04/2025 22:29

Quite simply - it's you and baby or the dog. Don't risk it.

Maitri108 · 10/04/2025 22:29

Keep Cujo away from your baby. It should have been put down after it killed a dog.

ToBeOrNotToBee · 10/04/2025 22:31

For God's sake OP.
This is the 3rd time I've seen posts from you asking for advice on what to do.
You moved continents to be with this man, knowing he would always put his dogs above you, his mum and now your child.
Congratulations. You truly have a prince amongst men.

bumbers1 · 10/04/2025 22:33

I wouldn't even engage in the conversation. If flat out say that dog is not ever coming to love with us and will never meet our child. Your job as parent is to protect your child. If your DH can't manage it then you will have to leave.

bumbers1 · 10/04/2025 22:34

Scuse the typos Blush

doodleschnoodle · 10/04/2025 22:35

Jesus wept.

’will also add the dog only snaps at weak people (a senior with cancer, and a friend with MS)’

This dog is dangerous and shouldn’t be around people full stop, whether they are ‘weak’ or not. Of course you can’t have a baby anywhere near it. The fact you have to ask is extremely concerning in itself. You’re going to be a parent. Wise the fuck up.

CountryQueen · 10/04/2025 22:37

If you allow this dog in a house with a newborn you are neglecting your baby.

Original poster
Oliveover28 · 10/04/2025 22:37

CountryQueen · 10/04/2025 22:37

If you allow this dog in a house with a newborn you are neglecting your baby.

I agree but what do you say to someone who says “we will keep them separate” and is buying the house….

OP posts:
Starlight7080 · 10/04/2025 22:38

Well common sense should really tell him and you that this dog should be nowhere near children . Especially not a baby .
If he can't put his child above a dog then he needs to reevaluate his priorities.
He hasn't a clue why the dogs snapping at people. And to be fair when it killed another dog it should have been put down

Grimbeorn · 10/04/2025 22:38

That would be the end of the relationship for me. You will feel the same once you have had the baby, but it will be too late to leave him by then, assuming a pp is right and you have moved away from your home country.
You need to move back before you have the baby, or you could be trapped there forever.

tillyandmilly · 10/04/2025 22:39

This dog has already killed another dog! The dog should be PTS- end of

Grimbeorn · 10/04/2025 22:40

Oliveover28 · 10/04/2025 22:37

I agree but what do you say to someone who says “we will keep them separate” and is buying the house….

Show quote history

You say, "Let's be clear Andrew. Your dog has a long history of vicious attacks on dogs and humans. My baby will not even meet it, let alone live with it. Rehome it now or I'm leaving you."
Obviously you need to return to your home country otherwise he will just leave the dog and baby together during his access times and you won't even be there to watch them.

AnSolas · 10/04/2025 22:41

Oliveover28 · 10/04/2025 22:37

I agree but what do you say to someone who says “we will keep them separate” and is buying the house….

Show quote history

Simple.

You get to pick one to live in the new house
• The baby or
• The dog

Derbee · 10/04/2025 22:41

Oliveover28 · 10/04/2025 22:37

I agree but what do you say to someone who says “we will keep them separate” and is buying the house….

Show quote history

What do you say to someone who is so weak and clueless that they have moved in with a man who has a dog that has killed another dog, but doesn’t really see it as a problem, and decides to have a baby with him?

YourWinter · 10/04/2025 22:42

No way. If his dog moves in, you, your dogs and your unborn child move out. And never, ever let it in the same house, garden or outside space as you, your dogs and your baby.

Do you seriously need to ask, or are you going to wait until your dogs and your child become tragic statistics?

Polecat07 · 10/04/2025 22:42

I wouldn't even risk trying to keep the pit bull separate from the other two dogs let alone a BABY.
This is insanity OP, human error will occur one day, you could never 100% guarantee there would be no slip ups keeping them apart. The consequences with a dog like this are never ever worth the risk of traumatising everyone involved.

Lookuptotheskies · 10/04/2025 22:44

I wouldn't even risk my dogs, let alone a baby. 😱😭

I'd rather set up home completely alone (and far far away so this idiot can't have unsupervised contact with your baby and his Pitbull in the same house).

Endofyear · 10/04/2025 22:52

Oliveover28 · 10/04/2025 22:37

I agree but what do you say to someone who says “we will keep them separate” and is buying the house….

Show quote history

I would tell him he has a choice - he can live with you and the baby or he can live with his dog - but that you will not live in the same house as the dog under any circumstances. You cannot have this dog anywhere near your baby. It would be extremely irresponsible and negligent to do so.

TubeScreamer · 10/04/2025 22:52

No child of mine wouid ever be in the same house as a pitbull. I say that as a dog person.

Barleysugar86 · 10/04/2025 22:52

My dog was nothing but sweet around my baby but I obviously never let them be alone together. I'd shut the dog out of the sitting room where the baby was sleeping when I went to the bathroom, but I came down and the dog was sat next to the baby basket (honestly looking kind of judgmentally at me like 'I can't believe you left the baby alone!'). Baby was untouched BUT I never knew he could open the sitting room door before that day. So yeah- all the best intentions of keeping them apart you can never guarantee, especially if the dog is motivated. I couldn't take the risk.

Isamummy2021 · 10/04/2025 22:54

Oliveover28 · 10/04/2025 22:17

It took me two years to convince my now husband to keep his pitbull dog with his mum for me to move into his house with my two small dogs. The reason for me not wanting my two dogs around his dog is his dog previously attacked and killed his mums small dog. Apparently he done this because the smaller dog kept snapping at him and the family seem to think it’s justified? Bear in mind this was a teacup senior dog. Awful.

anyway the agreement was the pitbull can come back once we buy a bigger house as I pushed for the can’t separate 3 dogs in a small house excuse. Anyway we are looking to buy a house this year, and husband is saying why wouldn’t his dog come back to live in the house he buys. Well, lately the dog has been snapping at people a little more, husband says oh it’s old age.

problem is, I’m now pregnant. I feel extremely uncomfortable around this dog, this dog around my dogs and now this dog around a defenseless baby? He says we will keep them separate, but that sounds like hell having a new born, and 3 dogs to keep separate whilst he’s at work all day. He said sometimes he will take him to work, and I could probably push for only having the dog at home on the weekends. But still, I just don’t know if I’ll be able to relax in my own home and I want to be in the best mindset possible to raise my first child. I want to feel relaxed at an already stressful time.

AIBU? Any suggestions on what to say to my husband as to why I don’t want his dog coming back. He is saying oh he only snaps at people he doesn’t know, not his own family. I will also add the dog only snaps at weak people (a senior with cancer, and a friend with MS) it’s like they can sense weakness. He fully believes this dog is going to see our baby as his family, but this dog is already ten years old.

Your 100% right there's no excuse !!! and I would be giving him a choice you and the baby or the dog I'd find my own place I would never risk my baby or my dog for a dog that's already mauled a dog. Please never let the dog near your dogs or the baby it's never worth the risk any dog can be a risk near kids but pitbulls are legally required to be muzzled outdoor due to their bite force they are lethal, it's one of the strongest originally bred for pit fights and it's in the genes. Once the dog killed his mum's dog was it assessed by a vet ? Really it should have been euthanised your husband admits it's losing it with age. OMG I love my pets but in my opinion that's not a pet dog is it. Dump the husband if you have to trust me it will kill you if anything happens and there's no way you can watch and separate 24/7. Be firm and say it's us or your dog it needs a single owner with bully experience I'd reach out to a rescue. But it's unlikely they would even take it with it's history it's killed there's no excuse it's a risk to people and animals.

Original poster
Oliveover28 · 10/04/2025 22:54

tillyandmilly · 10/04/2025 22:39

This dog has already killed another dog! The dog should be PTS- end of

Apparently he says it’s the other dogs fault and he has been castrated since then, blames it on him being young. For me, a leopard never changes its spots and I’ve been explaining to him I am not willing to take the risk.

OP posts:
titchy · 10/04/2025 22:54

Oliveover28 · 10/04/2025 22:37

I agree but what do you say to someone who says “we will keep them separate” and is buying the house….

Show quote history

What do you say? You say ‘I’m off back to my own country. Bye’ Obviously.

Or plan your baby’s funeral - your choice.

titchy · 10/04/2025 22:56

And aren’t pit bulls banned anyway?

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