Husbands pitbull becoming snappy in old age, and I’m pregnant

[Oliveover28]

It took me two years to convince my now husband to keep his pitbull dog with his mum for me to move into his house with my two small dogs. The reason for me not wanting my two dogs around his dog is his dog previously attacked and killed his mums small dog. Apparently he done this because the smaller dog kept snapping at him and the family seem to think it’s justified? Bear in mind this was a teacup senior dog. Awful.

anyway the agreement was the pitbull can come back once we buy a bigger house as I pushed for the can’t separate 3 dogs in a small house excuse. Anyway we are looking to buy a house this year, and husband is saying why wouldn’t his dog come back to live in the house he buys. Well, lately the dog has been snapping at people a little more, husband says oh it’s old age.

problem is, I’m now pregnant. I feel extremely uncomfortable around this dog, this dog around my dogs and now this dog around a defenseless baby? He says we will keep them separate, but that sounds like hell having a new born, and 3 dogs to keep separate whilst he’s at work all day. He said sometimes he will take him to work, and I could probably push for only having the dog at home on the weekends. But still, I just don’t know if I’ll be able to relax in my own home and I want to be in the best mindset possible to raise my first child. I want to feel relaxed at an already stressful time.

AIBU? Any suggestions on what to say to my husband as to why I don’t want his dog coming back. He is saying oh he only snaps at people he doesn’t know, not his own family. I will also add the dog only snaps at weak people (a senior with cancer, and a friend with MS) it’s like they can sense weakness. He fully believes this dog is going to see our baby as his family, but this dog is already ten years old.

If you're the poster I'm remembering, this guy said right at the beginning that his dog 'would recognise your children as part of his pack' and that was his reasoning for his feral dogs not attacking your children. We told you then that he wasn't someone to uproot your life and move to the US for. But you went anyway and now it's happening - your ONLY hope is to ignore his redneck family with their 'you've got to make a go of it' and get out of there, fast.

Sure I read recently about a pit bull killing its owner .
But agree with everyone else - you and your baby are way down the list on things he considers important.
Not really a good sign when you will need him to be very considerate and supportive for the next few years.

How the hell are you even CONSIDERING having a pit bull in a home/in the vicinity of a newborn baby....especially one that has killed another dog and is obvoiusly so aggressive....beggars belief.
Aren't they a banned breed?! Regardless, surely you can see the risks.
Midwifes/health visitors etc should be able to make safeguarding referrals when there are such dogs present in a home with young children.
The amount of deaths these bully dogs are causing is sickening....don't let your child be another statistic OP.
Your husband is clearly an idiot for thinking it's OK, and his mother too.
Get out and protect your baby.

You just got married in the last 10 days ?
as in your 31st March thread you were saying MIl was annoyed that other people knew you were getting married before she was told...

Did you see what pitbulls did to these kids in America?

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/baby-sister-killed-pitbulls-memphis-b2197336.html
They literally ripped the 5m old baby in half, the first responders have ptsd.

Look at all the child fatalities recorded on here. https://www.reddit.com/r/BanPitBulls/s/zMYP3607cS If you bring a newborn baby into a property with a pitbull, never mind a pitbull that has killed a creature bigger than a newborn, then frankly you need the baby removed from your care.

‘Goodbye’?

Get rid of both.

Dog and man.

Now he is saying he doesn’t trust my two small dogs around the baby and I should get rid of mine too?

Pit bulls are banned in the U.K. for very good reason. How the hell has nobody reported him for keeping one?

He would reply to this saying oh you think he’s going to suddenly run over and maul the baby. Eye roll. I don’t know what the right thing to do is right now. Thanks for all the comments.

You say, "Yes I do. I think your dog is dangerous and you're going to have to make a choice."

This man sounds like a stunningly stupid human.

You actually moved there to be with him and willingly married a man who values a dangerous dog above everyone around him? And then willingly decided to be impregnated by him?

Am I hallucinating?

Tell him he drops the idea of the dog ever even meeting your baby, or you're leaving.

Then follow through. Preferably before the baby is born so you're not trapped in the US.

This isn’t the same one surely! Ffs talk about making a rod for your own back!

I'd be very clear that I am not comfortable with a dog with a pattern on aggressive behaviour around myself or the baby.

But you need to mean it and be prepared to walk away from this.

I don't know why you'd chose to marry and have kids with someone like this.

"This" and I am a dog lover (and owner) His dog is looked after by his parents but no, given the dogs biting he should not be back. Hopefully someone is helping this dog with training.

You say “that dog is not living with my baby. It’s not up for discussion.” And if he refuses you leave, back to your home country, so he doesn’t get unsupervised access with your baby.
You get no prizes for saying the right thing but not actually doing it

Personally I think you should move back, and mind you I’m a Brit living in the States. Isn’t the US known for being particularly inflexible about American-born children leaving the country with only one parent?

It sounds like you don’t want to do that, however, so I’ll try to give some other advice too. How big is the house he’s buying? While it would be preferable for the dog to stay gone, I do think it’s possible to keep it separate in an American house with an American yard. Does it have an attached garage? Many houses here seem to have quite a few exterior doors (front, 2 or 3 back doors, and doors on each side). Is there one that he could install a kennel off of?

I do think you have options there, at least. American houses are so much larger and nearly all of them are detached. There will be room to keep them separate, if he actually does it.

He may have a point there.

You move the fuck out. If you love your baby.

Sorry this is hard, but you just have to draw a very firm boundary - I am a dog lover and have a big(ish) bully-faced(ish) dog and I wouldn't have anyone I love (or can see or know about for that matter) near this dog. He needs to be PTS, and I don;t say that lightly at all. If anything ever happens to your baby or your dogs or anyone else you;re responsible for as a result of this dog you will be culpable. Sorry - if he won't protect you from the fear of the dog let alone the risk then you need to leave him.

And you say yes I do and I will never ever let this be a possibility. it's the dog or me.

if he says your two small dogs are a problem you say if they ever attack and kill another dog i will immediately make sure they are never on the property with our baby.

but you have to move out. book a flight and go home. your base state has to be the only house you live in is one that dog doesnt. imagine being the mum who lets her tiny helpless baby be mauled by a pitbull because her partner said it would be fine.

For god's sake move back to the UK before having this poor baby. If you don't you are stuck in the US forever - complete with loser boyfriend and savage dogs.

And if you do get back to the UK get yourself some therapy to find out why you are making such awful choices.

I feel sorry for the baby. I actually feel sorry for all the dogs too.

Oliveover28 · Yesterday 22:37

CountryQueen · Yesterday 22:37
If you allow this dog in a house with a newborn you are neglecting your baby.
I agree but what do you say to someone who says “we will keep them separate” and is buying the house….

You CANNOT BE SERIOUS! If you cannot see what you are actually saying, then your child should be removed from you at birth.

The fact that your husband is prioritising the dog, the fact that you can't figure for yourself what you should be doing about the situation and the fact that so so many posters have told you you need to leave and you are still saying you don't no what to do... Unfortunately I think it's best the child be put up for adoption less they become another devastating statistic.