Found women's stockings in our laundry basket

[AmyRoger]

Hi all, probably a stupid question to ask but I found a pair of women's stockings in our laundry basket at home today. OH is away for work trip and my heart sank. I've sent photo asking what they are and who they belong to and he's not replied . I'm not imagining things right ?

Sounds dodgy to me!

My tired perimenopausal brain can't work this out 😢. Someone put my out of my misery, please? Something to do with stockings being used to rob banks?!

i know most mums netters think men are stupid but come on , you’ve got to be monumentally stupid to a) have an affair

Are you 12?!

How did they get there, they were in your bed and just thrown on the floor with his clothes and he dumped everything in the basket without looking?

And really, who wears stockings anymore?

I know it looks bad but maybe think about if there is any other way of it getting there. I once found a women's sock in my house, wasn't mine, too small for OH and I was furious. OH was adamant it wasn't his. It was a very particular sock (as in not just a plain black one). I very nearly left him over it because I couldn't see any other explanation than he had had another woman round. Weeks later I was with my sister and she was wearing odd socks, one of them was the other sock to the one that I had found! I had been to stay with her before finding the sock but it was a few weeks before I spotted it SO I hadn't connected it up.

Robbers such as @BurglarAndSwag put stockings or tights over their heads so they're less identifiable (or leave evidence such as hairs?). Therefore there's less call for stockings now that high street banks are closing due to fewer opportunities for in person robbery.

A lesser appreciated effect of the move online, the inconvenience to criminals.

He’d been away with work and met up with her and I presume stockings got caught up with his clothes and he emptied his things out and put them straight the washing basket without looking (or thinking). Was over 10 years ago so I can’t completely remember.

Thank you! I should have been able to work this out, but I had nothing!

No.

Not sure what my age has to do with anything though.

let’s be honest, it’s pretty dumb to have an affair, you always get found out.

if you think affairs or casual sex outside of marriage is ok then good for you, I don’t , and I think it’s pretty stupid….

well I am really so sorry, but if they are not yours, then they are another woman's, and the only way they've got into the house is via him.

Really sorry and you need to have a phone call with him about this.

I think sometimes there are occasions where the OW deliberately leaves something to out the relationship.

If I didn't live in male dominated household, I think my husband might be a little suspicious to find random male underwear which I professed to know nothing about in our laundry. (In our household it just means that stuff got put away in the wrong drawer.)

I think your husband's very blasé attitude is a little weird. I mean short of somebody staying with you who forgot their stockings or them being accidentally tucked in with some shop purchase, I can think of how they might have got there. Did your husband dump the clothes, complete with stockings, when he last emptied his suitcase before he went away?

How often does he go away and does he have enough autonomy, money, discretionary time and so on to conduct an affair or see an escort? I'd be having a look through bank statements - look for cash withdrawals as well - and maybe needing to borrow his phone?

@AmyRoger I realise it's too late now, but what a pity you messaged him about them. I would have waited to show them to him face-to-face to see his reaction. Anyway, there may be a not-so-concerning reason so try not to over-react until you've had a proper conversation with him about them.

We had some unidentified mens boxers in our room which mystified us for a while.
A month or so later I managed to work out that my Mum, when we went to go stay, had put them into my husbands bag thinking they were his- they were actually my stepdads. From there my husband had been quite lax about unpacking the suitcase in our room for a bit and they'd ended up on our bedroom floor.
Thankfully he never thought I'd been playing away!
But do you think you might have swept them up when staying with relatives/ friends/ having people come to stay with you in the past few months?

Jeez...Took me a minute, too!

you don't by any chance have a cleaner / nanny or a babysitter ?
and she has used your washing machine - without your knowledge / permission and she has left a pair of tights/ stockings in the machine ?

Stockings are for sex, tights are for warmth.

OWs do have a habit of marking their territory - the earring under the pillow, the lipstick mark, the stray hair on the car seat.

If they're not yours, and too small for him - they're hers.

I'd be investigating for more signs.

I'm sorry to hear this. I can't think of an innocent explanation. You need to have a think about what you want to do before he gets home.

Stockings are for sex, tights are for warmth.

Stockings are also for not ending up with BV or thrush, which some women are prone to get when wearing tights because of the nylon gusset.

However, if OP doesn't wear them, then they can't be hers.

Stockings or tights? If he is having an affair, it's a bit weird to randomly pick up the two stockings, pack them away, then put them in the laundry at home for your wife to wash. Same with tight actually. Plus, I imagine the affair partner would notice her bare legs.

I must be being slow , missing the joke here

I bet you been waiting to use that for a loooooong time.

People used to put stockings over their face to rob banks to "hide" their identity.

I'm slightly wondering if it's a work trip now

Oh wait, you didn't find them in the laundry basket. You found them when you were sorting out the dried clothes. So they could have been in the basket, the machine, or the dryer. Think hard: Have you had people to stay? Christmas was only a couple of months ago and tights can stick places and get caught up with other things, and then randomly turn up. Have you had anyone get changed in your house? (Tights can get caught up with stuff.) And are you absolutely SURE they are not yours?