Husbands food preferences driving me crazy - NEW THREAD

[Jessa85]

NEW THREAD for those following my thread from yesterday!

I will post the update of my conversation with my husband in a second.Original thread

Congratulations on keeping your calm and getting this far. I think I would find it hard to grey rock in the circumstances, I am very impressed with your abilities. A quick question, if I may, no need to answer, you must be exhausted with it all, but did he realise when you handed him the car keys that for you it is all over and you want a divorce, or is that a revelation yet to come for him? Did he understand by your moving the money that the marriage is over as far as you’re concerned?

Just a little message to say I think you have been so composed and brave. I hope my daughter grows up to be a woman like you. Form experience I know this anti climax bit is really difficult emotionally, but keep moving forward, thinking about how your life will look in a couple of years. Huge well done xx

Well done @Jessa85 I would suggest a takeaway for tea and early night for you tonight, try to get some rest as I suspect you have been running on nervous energy this week. Please take care.

Have you changed rhe password on the ipad yourself so you can keep tabs?

You are awesome.

When the shock wears off you are going to be knackered. Take it as easy as you can.

Do you have a ring doorbell? Might be worth getting one, just to have an extra record if he turns up to berate you in person.

That will alert him

Never regret this for a second. You've absolutely done the best thing for you, your girls and your future. All the best to you OP. Always come back here for support. Sending hugs to you

It never ceases to amaze me the sheer size of this type of mans ego! They really think that they are so clever, so untouchable and will never get found out. That their wives are too stupid to see what they are up to.

And as for moving the money, how DARE you foil his plan to take the lot and run?! Because I am sure that was the idea. Play nice until August, fuck off to the UAE and take the money with him because it will be nigh on impossible to get it back if he is out of the country. And the big reveal didnt bring him what he wanted did it? How dare you not turn in a blubbering mess begging him to not leave you for her and doing the pick-me dance? I suspect that the anger will be as much about the fact that you proved he isnt as clever as he thinks he is, as it is about the money. He is on the serious back foot and he is panicking.

Well played @Jessa85 very very well played.

@Jessa85 wins Mumsnet.
Respect.

Have to feel a teeny weeny bit sorry for this man. He swanned off on business abroad safe in the knowledge that he had a mistress at home, a whole bunch of secret savings and investments, and a dowdy subservient unsuspecting wife. Comes home to discover that the wife has been transformed into a confident, efficient, power house of a woman.
At some point in the next 24 hours, he will realise the full impact of what is happening. Far from shacking up with his mistress with his secret savings tucked away securely. he has lost his home, lost at least 50% of the savings, lost part of his pension. and will have to pay child maintenance in line with his earnings (and this is likely to be a lot, lot more than the current meagre contribution to the household). And he still does not know the extent of what she knows!
Sad, really😂😂

Well done, especially for staying calm in face of his shouting when he realised you were entitled to take your half of the money and didn't give a shit about his 'other woman'.

Hope the divorce papers hit him first thing tomorrow so he realises you've been preparing to do this for a while.

And now he’s turned up at Stiletto Sonya’s. She got the cheap Prosecco on, something flammable from the Ann Summers Sale Rail and she’s repackaged some Wotsits because she’s watched the new Meghan Markle show, Clive has bounced through the door breathing fire. And Sonya is about to find out who she’s hitched her wagon to.
Because what he’s been doing isn’t just abusive. It’s illegal and unethical and he can scream all he likes, but OP pre-empted him. He left all of that lovely evidence in his own home, thinking she would be none the wiser.
And he can argue anything he likes but OP literally has all the evidence she needs.
To think he told her to get a better job. What an absolute bellend.
And these are real people, it’s not a soap, this man has absolutely no conscience. His first thought was for his bank balance, not even his children.
I hope the book, the bookshelf and the library gets thrown at him.

OP you could have a new career writing short stories! The twists and turns since the first post on your original thread are gripping, you articulate things really well. Your STBX might earn big money but you’re the one with the brains and vision. This is the beginning of a brighter future, hang in there.

Yay!!!

Try and keep the iPad a secret. You might find out his next moves via messages. Hope you're okay.

You are doing great. I am sure you have already thought of it but disconnect the IPad from WiFi and remove sim if there is one

Really well done Jessa, you are awesome, so brave too 🌟🌟🌟

One thing to do for you is rest. Rest and eat as well as you are able and take a good tonic or multivitamin.

Very often in times of immense stress it's like our body waits until we are "safe" to hit you with a bug or flu that knocks you on your ass.

So some self care is in order.

Well done Jessa ❤️

I have just caught up on all this and just needed to add another hand holding well done.
The adrenalin is probably keeping you going right now so just be prepared for that crash and the inevitable what the fuck moment you might have

When that happens remember you're right. Remember you're teaching your children how to value and respect a wife and a mother and showing your them what to do when you're disrespected and how a partner should be valued and cherished

That is the best gift you could ever hand down to them

Bloody well done you xxx

Well done Champion.
Thank Goodness you had a heads up
What a sanctimonious bastard.

Well done.

Well done. And it is marvelous that you have catalogued your progress on this thread. You have no idea how helpful it will be to others going through the same sort of situation . So on their behalf thank you very much

PS You might consider quietly recording his next lot of rants. Not for public use but to keep in mind just what a total t* he is should you ever get the urge to weaken